My View (vol. 14)

French Quarterfest 2014

The people, the dancing, the music: it was an awesome experience - much more "of the people" than Jazz Fest, and very local!

An InLinkz Link-up

Happy Saturday!

#7QT: Eating Our Way Through The Week

Back by popular demand... Grace Harriet here to dialogue about my week. It was Mom's birthday on Wednesday, so, between naps and feedings, we've been having a rawther good time.

{one}

My debut as Super Grace with my loyal sidekick (Mr. Muscle) went smashingly! The Lower Garden District is safe. Jackson Ave., I'm watching you.

Super Grace and Mr. Muscle

{two}

My people!

Mom's excited because it's her birdday

{three}

Those donuts. Dang. Mom made a good choice for breakfast. When do I start solids again?!

wedding cake & glazed

Even my not-a-sweets-person Dad duly enjoyed his:

Nom.

{four}

Then, we got a big package from Cincinnati! (What's Mom's is mine, right?)

And red velvet cupcakes!

{five}

Tulane sponsored a crawfish boil yesterday, which is Dad's favorite food. Dad said it was the best day of his life, but he clearly meant of that week... Because my arrival was the best, right? Right?!

Heaven will be a big ole crawfish boil

It was delectable. Not pictured: brass band playing. 

Hamming for the Gram.

Baldwin babes.

{six}

Mostly, though, I just like hanging out with my people. Both of them! 

Here's one before bed. While walking down memory lane, Dad showed me his cards.

Not pictured: Mom reading The Happiest Baby Guide to Great Sleep by Dr. Harvey Karp. Not sure why, I am super well-rested. I even get up early! 

{seven} 

Tomorrow, we'll watch the St. Patrick's Day parade down the Irish Channel! That and me rolling by myself for the first time... Quite a week! Mom is hosting My View link-up again tomorrow; you should join in too!

Happy weekend! Joining in with Jen!

Weekends with Grace

Hello Y'all,

Grace here. Dad had spring break this week for Mardi Gras, so I had my grandparents visit! Then, a present from Cincinnati!

For me?

Why? Why not! I need a St. Patrick's Day outfit! I'm Irish! (Thanks Mom!) Dad has Irish in him too, but tends to defer to his stoic English side... oooh, tissue paper.

A few new outfits helped me feel better about this teething business. Teething has been bringing out all the emotions, especially sadness...

But nothing a little baby wearing didn't solve. Thanks Mom! Sorry about the, you know, drool.

On Saturday, there was weight-lifting/ flying lessons with Dad!

Then he carried me around in my princess chariot because I am a princess and he is my servant. I mean father. He is my father-who-does-what-I-imply-through-cries-and-coos.

I know, I'm pretty cute, right?

Mom and Dad decided on Saturday afternoon Confession and Mass so Dad could focus on his protocol work all of Sunday... exhausting! 

My behavior: A
Pews with seat cushions: B+

Teething toy bonding while Mama folded laundry...

Little Lefty Baldwin

Sunday was spent mostly outside, enjoying the sunshine of New Orleans.

Totally natural, not posed

Then a family walk up the street where we perused through Nadeau - lots of pretty colors!

Who's the fairest of them all?

Finally, after my blowing bubbles marathon, leg kicks, reaching up towards my parrot under my gym, and a few more meals, I settled in for a nice deep sleep.

Psych!

Good night, all!

My View (vol. 2)

Mardi Gras has started in New Orleans, and there are parades every day. I like to watch on the ParadeCam, but last night we joined the crowds on St. Charles Street to watch the Skeleton Krewe parade go by - it was so fun!

All the people on the floats wear masks and pass out cups, beads and other novelties. There are krewes of all women, or all men, or mixed - and they have a theme, and dress up accordingly, and sometimes dance. There are high school bands and dancers and twirlers and cheerleaders. There are also men who walk with huge torches, and other men riding on horseback, straight out of The Horse and His Boy.

I like the people who get right up next to the float, shouting for stuff. It was hilarious, and totally over-the-top.

Nice float, eh? The Skeleton Krewe was awesome! Very macabre. Then a packet of beads landed between Grace and me - nice catch, baby ergo! Will put them on Grace.

And in the spirit of not trusting the people next to us (the lady asked if Grace was a month old...no, Miss 92nd percentile is 5 months...), we took a grainy selfie to commemorate that we were all at the parade together. Happy weekend!

An InLinkz Link-up

#7QT: Love What You Do

Joining Jen - Happy Friday!

{one}

New adventures: typing one-handed while your baby has your left index finger in a Chinese finger trap, except that attempts to squeeze out results in tears. But, this is good for me. As the perpetual planner, I'm learning to enjoy the moment more and jump ahead less. I like it.

Waking up snuggles

{two}

Last day of Black History month - shout-out to Dr. Mildred Jefferson, the first black woman to graduate from Harvard Medical School, the first woman in the Boston Surgical Society, and a leader in the National Right to Life movement. She died in October 2010.

{three}

Here she is giving an awesome talk about the National Right to Life movement:



Real, honest, charming.

{four}

Another awesome woman: Mayim Bialik. From PolicyMic:

During a red carpet interview at the SAG awards this January, the actress was forced into an awkward situation after Bono's doppelganger tried to asked her if people assume that she can do advanced math because she plays a smart character on TV. As it turns out, she can do calculus in her sleep because she's secretly a neuroscientist. And by secretly, I mean she publicly taught for several years, wrote a book about the science of hormones for parenting and has given several public (and very recent) lectures about the importance of investing in STEM careers and research. Oh and she's also the official spokesperson for Texas Instruments graphing calculators.

Her author bio is pretty rockin' too:

Mayim Bialik, Ph.D., is perhaps best known for her lead role as Blossom Russo in the 1990s television sitcom Blossom, and she currently appears on the top-rated comedy The Big Bang Theory. Bialik earned a B.S. from UCLA in 2000 in neuroscience and Hebrew and Jewish studies, and a Ph.D. in neuroscience from UCLA in 2007. She designed a neuroscience curriculum for homeschoolers in Southern California, where she also teaches middle and high school students. Married to her college sweetheart with two young sons, Bialik is also a Certified Lactation Education Counselor. Visit her at MayimBialik.net.

You go, girl!

{five}

Verily's Life Style Editor wrote a "Love What You Do" article, and it is so well-said.

While there’s nothing wrong with doing what you love, I have a more universal mantra to propose: “Love what you do.” Turning the DWYL mantra around can help see through the false liberty that our culture maintains as true—that happiness can only be attained if you do what you love. On the contrary, it’s a journey to love—not merely doing things you enjoy—that leads to true happiness.

Read the whole thing.

{six}

"Chasing after the DWYL [Do What You Love] mentality can easily transform into a sense of entitlement (“I deserve to do something more,” “I’m too good for this,” “If only I were happy in my job, then I could . . . “) which leads to self-centeredness and bitterness toward others." --Krizia Liquodo

I think it is natural to have these feelings as we people search for our likes and dislikes; but it's also easy to form resentments, and start comparing lives.

Why does she get that job? I've been job searching forever!
He got engaged? But he's so weird! I want to be engaged too.
Why does she keep posting pictures of her dog/ baby/ new purse/ cool location where she lives?
He always posts the coolest posts. Why don't I find those kind of interesting posts?

Like it or not, you're you, and there is a reason. That's why we're on this earth - to pursue our adventures!

• You want to be in love; nay! Be married! Yes, the snuggles are great - but married people do not sit around snuggling each other all day. They continue living their lives, and some days are great, and some days are hard, and every day is a choice to love. And the harder thing is often loving yourself as much as you love the ones you care about - learn to love yourself today so you can best know how to love another when the time comes.
• So you don't have your dream job? Keep working towards it. No one should want to peak early - keep earning it. 
• Lonely? So are a lot of people. Start volunteering at an older people's home - give companionship to people who can't get out like you can.

Stop feeling sorry for yourself. I say that because I do it all the time. Moping occasionally, whatever. But when I get sleep deprived, I get silly. The demons have a play day, and poke me: I'm so far from family, Will is gone at school, Grace take-yer-nap-right-now, I have to stop reading about residency, and, and, and... God has blessed me. I am blessed. I take life one moment at a time. In fact, I should do so much more with my life! Life is not a series of social media posts; life is real, and a struggle, and delicious, and active.

#GraceADay keeps the thugs at bay...

{seven}

But then I read posts about cats that go missing and I laugh. Life is goofy.This article on Jane Austen re-writing the history of England is gold too.

Oh, and The View (vol. 2) is going up tomorrow - join me!

Five Favorites (v. 6)

A few indulgences in my life lately:

{one}

The Frozen soundtrack

Okay, I've never seen the movie... but I want to; plus, my siblings share all these secret inner stories and loves and knowledge that only movie watchers understand. Brittany wrote a great piece on it for The Mirror Magazine, and I've spent most of today listening to the soundtrack on Spotify.

What's not to love? Sisters, heartache, humor, courage, love and Broadway star Idina Menzel (yes, from Wicked). Swoon, Disney.

I don't know what those little people are, but they're hilarious:

{two}

On that note... here is a hair tutorial for Elsa's braid. I'm always looking for ways not to wear my hair in a ponytail (little fingers hold tight):

{three}

King Cake. Apparently, not everyone celebrates happiness. I mean, Mardi Gras. My husband, for example, did not know what a king cake is before last night when I brought home a delicious one from Whole Foods. But honey, we live in New Orleans... indulge! Lent is in one week! The colors of purple, green and gold stand for justice, faith and power.

Look at dat baby!

Fun fact: down here, they fix more than cinnamon king cakes - praline, raspberry cream cheese, berry chantilly, and more!

{four}

Instagram. Total gramification. Totally in love. Follow me for giggles.

{five}

Today is five months since Grace was born. Love you, smiley baby!

Joining Hallie!

Five Favorites (v. 3)

I've decided I need an outlet for fluffiness. I bet you do too!

{one}

I'm on the perpetual trail of nutritious, healthy and budget friendly breakfast options. Breakfast is my favorite meal of the day; brunch is my second favorite, and brinner is my third favorite. My morning starts with oatmeal, a spoonful of brown sugar and two tablespoons of ground flax seed. I've heard great things about flax seed and chia seeds, so I'm experimenting. I'm here to say - I love flax seed. I've put it in my pancakes and greek yogurt now too: bueno! Affordable too at $4.99/ bag at Whole Foods.

Flax benefits include an amazing source of fiber and omega-3 fatty acids, and helps reduce risks for diabetes, cancer and heart disease.

{two}

Trumpette Jitterbug Jenny socks! Grace was sent a set from a family friend, and they are adorable, frilly, colorful socks. They look like the cutest little shoes, and they keep Grace's toes warm, which is important since she inherited my perpetually chilly-cold hands and feet. The little elastic at the top (which does not cut off circulation to her pudgy legs) are an extra bonus!

Did I mention they are adorable?

(And so is Grace.)

{three}

This house a few blocks from our house - the deep teal color with the buttery cream, Mardi Gras beads off the mailbox, the American flag, and the front step garden complete with two trees growing in a bathtub.

{four}

After writing my piece on St. Elizabeth of Hungary and the homeless, my mention of my want (vs. need) of this Mega Seat for Grace landed baby girl a very generous gift from her fan club. It really is everything I wanted and more - plus Grace enjoys it too, which is a double plus! I am still totally bowled over by the generosity and love given to my little family.

Hey girl... want to play Patty Cake with me? Mark it with a 'G'!

Look! It's those cute socks again!

{five}

Have you ever been wrong about someone after priding yourself on being an excellent judge of character? I joined a book club for this year, and first up is Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen, the classic tale of coming to age, mistakes, humility and intellectual honesty. The pace of the book, the character sketches, the drama and - of course - the excellent writing voice of Miss Austen makes this book a must-read. I'm also on the BBC P&P movie train; Colin Firth as Mr. Darcy? The obvious choice. 

There was a live discussion on this book, as part of the Motherhood + Jane Austen book club I joined this year: listen here!

#7QT: Just Jogging in Sperry's, Y'all!

It's between 12 a.m. and 2 a.m. and I have a Grace Harriet on my chest, bobbing her head... so let's get our link-up groove on with Jen & co.!

ONE

The most important thing: I woke up to this face yesterday morning.

I know. She's fabulous.

TWO

The second most important piece of business is the Liturgical Living: Advent link-up I am doing. Why? Because you should join in! I'm dying for insights into the holy season and how to make it more festive. Like, feast days: talk to me. Which ones do y'all celebrate? How do you celebrate? What about caritas in this giving season? And decorating. Please. In the mean time, it's raining/ misting down here in New Orleans. I thought hurricane season was over? Maybe this is what winter looks like.

So join in! You know you want to participate.  Will and I watched Christmas Vacation tonight; now that movie is full of good cheer! We love the neighbors.

THREE

On Tuesday, I had Will do Xtend Barre with me. Since it's pilates + ballet, I think he thought it would be "easy"... and he was wrong. Feel the burn, darling. For me, however, what hurt more was what we did Wednesday.

I put our mail on hold three weeks ago, before I went home with my Dad and Grace, since Will would be gone most of the week on interviews. I asked Will to meet me downtown so we could get the mail together (I can't carry a box of mail and push Grace in the stroller). First post office gave us a package but says our mail is at the other downtown location.

Well. My car was getting an oil change, but Will's car only had a half hour on the meter. So he pushed Grace and walked so fast that I had to jog to keep up. Jogging in Sperry's on the unforgiving pavement of downtown New Orleans - 10+ minutes there, and another 10ish minutes back - is the best way to bring your shin splint pains back. In case you have plans to mimic my exercise style(s).

And no, we didn't get our mail, since you are wondering. Yes, I filled out the yellow slip. (The man at the other post office remembers!) Thank you, post lady, for giving us two names and phone numbers and telling us not to mention you by name. Another day then? Retrieving one's mail is top secret business down here... Aaaaand we're jogging again.

FOUR

It feels really good to be home, and by home, I mean our townhouse in New Orleans. It's a mess right now, as I get to sort through a large stack of papers I left for "later", writing more thank you notes (a wonderful blessing!!), my organization binder is in chaos, and there is always more laundry and cleaning to be done. Still - it's my work, it's my home, and it's my responsibility. That feels really good.

I feel a steep learning curve in decorating my own home. I'm glad Grace won't remember this Christmas, and a little disappointed she doesn't see how cute her binky looks sitting in her tiny shoe for St. Nick's feast day! We head back up north in less than two weeks... hard to believe! Will took an exam today, and has more, plus a couple of interviews before we drive north for another one and Christmas break. It's exhausting seeing people and sharing Grace, and so thrilling at the same time.

FIVE

Most surreal part of my week? A recommendation which lead to a phone interview that resulted in a job offer. I'm going to teach AP and regular US history, y'all! For a classical school online! More on that later.

SIX

I like this article by Mary:

Pioneer and medieval women spent a lot of time sewing and cooking, sure, but that can't have been so much more boring than the plowing and animal-feeding the men were doing. Those same women spent a lot of time pregnant (earlier marriages, no modern means to postpone/avoid pregnancy, etc.), which was probably about as risky as fixing the roof or going to war, and probably seen as a good thing if for no other reason than that more kids meant more hands to help run the farm. 

This division of labor seems more sensible than sexist: if you're breastfeeding, you should be where the babies are, and if you're pregnant, you should do less heavy lifting. So it makes sense that the never-pregnant men would do the heavier work and the frequently-pregnant women would do the lighter -- but equally demanding and equally important -- work. In the days before Hot Pockets and Ann Taylor, someone had to cook and sew or the family wouldn't be fed and clothed. 

(Mary C. Tillotson, "Redeeming 'Women's Studies'", The Mirror Magazine)

SEVEN

Thursday Thrills: Will is re-reading Mockingjay. Grace is less enthusiastic.

"What's in this for me?"

Happy Friday, all!

Alabama Roads

Traveling at present from an interview (yesterday) - baby's first big trip!  Three days, four states, seven new friends (for Grace), and an open road to take us home.

"I am a great believer in variations on routine." -Kaye Gibbs, Charms for the Easy Life

Nothing quite like having a friend you loved in your girlhood be just as dear in your womanhood. 

Blessings in Southern living!

What the Opposite of Insomnia? Zombie Land.

When I was pregnant with Grace, I had insomnia, even while taking sleep medications. It was positively horrible. I was so tired that I couldn't do anything but think about how tired I was. I would try to pray the rosary, but forget where I was (usually counted on my fingers) or how to say the prayers. I would get up to work, bur be too tired to read or write. It was a fate worse than death - tired and unproductive by day and night.

So, pretty much preparing me for a normal life post-Grace.

Monday: Grace was awake between 2-4 a.m. As I fed her and burped her and changed her diaper (twice) and paced around the six steps between our bedroom door and the outside wall), I wondered, Why you were still awake?

Wednesday: Grace cried for 3-4 hours for seemingly no reason. Fortunately, before bed. 

No! Not my gum drop buttons!

Friday: We're having another crying day. She cried with her Dad. She cried with her Mom. She cried in the 10 minute drive to pick up Will from class, only to promptly fall asleep for the next two hours. After dinner, Miss Fussykins and I walked to Wal-Mart to look for a new day planner (no success, but Christmas decorations are out!), and she fell asleep. She's awake again, so this post will be short.

Her, earlier. I'm savoring that moment.

The opening to this morning's Psalm was Isaiah 28:8 - The Lord God will wipe away/ the tears from all faces. I laughed when I read that - thank you Lord! I need a good wiping too!

Grace is officially 15 days old today. She's expanded our hearts in so many ways, and stretched me further than I thought I could handle. When I was asked today "what I do all day", I said that my day starts around 3 a.m., when I feed Grace and change her diaper. Back to sleep. Then 6 a.m., when I feed Grace and change her diaper. Maybe sleep? (Will gets up around then; I'm toying with daily mass in the morning vs. before lunch.) Same for 9 a.m., etc. and all the way till the evening, when she goes to sleep for a few hours before her 3 a.m. wake-up call.

My mom left this morning, so this week will be our first alone - just Will, Grace and me. My mother-in-law and sister-in-law will be down in a week or so, but I already miss my mom (and not just because she fixed me an omlette every morning, made sure I ate plenty of vegetables, and believes strongly in dessert). She reminded me to nap and to suppress my "busy bee gene". She helped me not feel overwhelmed when Grace refused to be soothed. She carried Grace, changed her diapers, gave her baths, showered Grace with love, and introduced her to the "No Such Thing As Too Many Pictures" family motto.

Okay, you caught me. Binky to the rescue!

I'm so tired now. I can fall asleep and stay asleep. Tonight, on our quest for a new day planner, I could have sat down and snoozed for a few minutes. I walked around in a daze, jealous of Grace sleeping while being cuddled in the baby snuggly.

And it is such a good tired. The kind of tired after a good work-out; the kind of tired when you know you're doing a job well done. I'm tired, and I've never felt so fulfilled day after day. It really is amazing. I'm not totally organized - I did two loads of laundry and folded one - I did not make it to the grocery store - I'm still writing out thank you cards - I'm hopelessly behind on my real writing projects - I am content.

This evening's verse before the Canticle of Mary prayer is Acts 3:6 - Peter said, 'I have neither silver nor gold, but what I do have I give you: in the name of Jesus Christ the Nazarene, [rise and] walk.'

The beauty of living out one's purpose, one's vocation, is that one's soul is happy. The work load may be heavy or tedious or crabby, but the reasons for your work is in its fruits. I still can't believe how blessed I am to be married to Will and doubly blessed with our daughter. God is so good, and works through all the cracks of our flaws and failures to lead us on the path of salvation.

I fully admit that I'm a bit terrified of being a stay-at-home mom. I'll still be writing and editing, but even that has taken a backseat through my rough pregnancy and now recovering postpartum time. My mom worked outside the home while I was growing up (her vocation is in medicine as well as being a mom!), so my main influence has been a work-home balance. Fortunately, most of my mom's side as well as my mother-in-law stayed home with her kids, so I'll have many sounding boards.

Friends, how do you walk in this life? Is there a hop in your step or do you drag your heels? Do you consider your job part of your vocation or more of a career which will you will gladly relinquish one day?

Annnnnnnnd she's asleep (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!). And so I adieu, adieu, to you, and you, and you! This zombie needs to re-charge her batteries.

The Need for Self-Care

Originally published at The Mirror Magazine

Last Sunday, I drove two and a half hours to a beach in Alabama with my husband and a friend, chatting and laughing and singing along to the radio and our CD collection. A couple hours later, we were driving back to New Orleans, with white sand stuck to all the crevices and skin (and in our hair), sunburns, and conversations that would dwindle off as a favorite song came into play.

Once we crossed back over the border into Louisiana, I asked my husband to drive because I was so tired. The waves had been strong and full, white-capping and carrying our bodies forward and onward. It takes strength to stand up against the tide, even when you dig your feet into the sand and swear you shan't move. But moving isn't the problem - it's where you end up. Let yourself get swayed, and you'll end up 20 feet down the beach. But maybe that's where the adventure starts? As I sat on the sand in the late afternoon and watched the sand crabs dive into their holes, I thought: this is self-care.

Self-care "refers to actions and attitudes which contribute to the maintenance of well-being and personal health and promote human development." Self-care starts with self-awareness.

What are you able to do? What do you want to do? Why are you feeling this way?

My husband likes reading on the beach between swims, and our friend took at least one nap on her towel, but as I was less than two weeks away from my due date (a week now!), I cannot lie on a towel without needing Will to physically help me up again or sit comfortably near the hot sand for so long. So, I thought, what do I want to do? And it was a wonderful feeling. I went and sat on the lower part of the beach, and let the waves wash over my legs and my belly, where my baby pokes me and teases me.

It's taken me nine months to get to the point where I can sit in the sand. I've never taken leisure time very seriously. There was work time, vacation time, quality time (with friends and/or family), chore time and productive time. Even sleep time got the short end of the stick, more often than not.

Leisure is not the same as self-care, but it can feel that way to me. Instead of being optional, however, self-care is possibly one of the most important things a person can do for herself. Self-care is a recognition of your limitations, a want to improve, and a desire for sanity. If a person does not relax, their body will become ragged and force rest upon them in forms of sickness or exhaustion, mental and physical.

Source

Self-care can come from necessity - my pregnancy forced me to re-evaluate how I never took time to rest. Self-care must become a habit, verses a special occasion.

I've focused my self-care on four areas: daily prayer, daily exercise, daily writing, and naps.

I've taken small steps - morning prayer, and daily mass once a week. Exercise for 30 minutes. Writing without publishing.

I learned to nap. I learned to sit down and watch. I learned that it was okay being passive, as long as you didn't get stuck there. I learned that it was okay to let people help you, and admit that you can't handle a work load.

This week, I think I'll paint my nails. I've organized the closets and re-written the chore and grocery list, for my own peace of mind. Now, to finish a few bigger projects and book reviews!

How do you self-care, reader? Do you self-care? Why or why not? What is holding you back if you're not?

Five Favorites - In Vino Veritas! Edition

Check out Hallie's here!

{one}

The top slot of the day goes to Maple Bourbon Bacon Jam.

Yes, you heard me. MAPLE BOURBON BACON JAM. I have not had this particular kind, but I have had bacon jam, and I am beyond ecstatic at the thought of going home for the holidays and creating my own jars of deliciousness with my bestie and fellow foodie Sarah.

H/T to the always wonderful April, who has made her own jars and is making me seriously contemplate driving west to obtain a jar or two...

{two}

Next, Essie nail polish - because it is a happy, classy brand. It also makes my hands look like they have a party to attend.

{three}

Every Saturday, we have Supper Club with a classmate of Will's and her sister, who have become very dear friends down here. Unfortunately for them, their neighborhood is infested by roosters. Fortunately for me, I got to spy this sweet mama hen and her three chicks this past weekend!

I know I'm not the one being woken up every morning by them, but GOSH they're cute!

{four}

We had another one of Will's classmates over for dinner and he brought the wine. If I was not preggo, I may have consumed half the bottle. It is that delicious; and the label is funny too!

Barrel Monkeys, 2011 Shiraz - from McLauren Vale in Australia.

{five}

My Dad ordered me my very own subscription of The Magnificat and it is so comforting to me to have morning prayer, the mass readings, and evening prayer at my disposal, as well as a daily reflection and saint of the day. I was especially touched by this passage: "Behold, I have left an open door before you, which no one can close." (Rev 3:8)

I love that I can read it all through my iPhone app as well - much better than bringing the book along, and then misplacing it for days.

Have a wonderful day, y'all!