They Call Today "Good"

Every Triduum, starting with Maundy Thursday through Easter Sunday, I re-read T.S. Eliot’s “The Four Quartets”. It is four of his best poems, and for anyone who only knows his poetry ala in “The Hollow Man” or “The Wasteland” (critiques of modernity, not praise), his words may be surprising.

For instance, it is in “East Coker”, the second of the quartet, in which Eliot wrote,

The dripping blood our only drink,

The bloody flesh our only food:

In spite of which we like to think

That we are sound, substantial flesh and blood—

Again, in spite of that, we call this Friday good.

How can this Friday be good? Today Jesus was denied, whipped, humiliated, crucified. And why? In today’s gospel, John remind us that all this happens to fulfill the Scriptures. Jesus accepted the cup his father passed him – he accepted, fully, what must happen. Did he have the power to prove himself, as Satan tempted him to in the desert? Of course. But the hardness of the high priests should not be softened by might, but by truth.

What is truth? asked Pilate; a question so modern still that audiences cannot help but relate. Good Friday is the day when Jesus seems the most human. He is condemned and he dies. We are reminded in the second reading that “we do not have a high priest/ who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses,/ but one who has similarly been tested in every way,/ yet without sin” (Hebrews 4:15-16).

Indeed, as the reading continues (Heb 5:7-9):

In the days when Christ was in the flesh,

he offered prayers and supplications with loud cries and tears

to the one who was able to save him from death,

and he was heard because of his reverence.

Son though he was, he learned obedience from what he suffered;

and when he was made perfect,

he became the source of eternal salvation for all who obey him.

The goodness of this day lies in Jesus’ very passion for us all; a love to conquer death, a truth that “I AM” is a witness as well as a declaration. Today, the veil has been torn and we enter Golgotha, the place of skulls. The King of the Jews is dead, and so Eliot finishes his poem: “In the end is my beginning.”

Today was hard. Today was terrible. Today was good. We wait. The tomb is close by…

{Published at Ignitum Today}

Follow me: Bloglovin // Facebook // Google+ // Instagram // Twitter

Internet Ire and Righteous Results

The readings for February 6, 2015:

First reading: Hebrews 13:1-8
Responsorial Psalm: PS 27:1, 3, 5, 8B-9ABC
Alleluia: Luke 8:15
Gospel: Mark 6:14-29

Pope Francis “hanging out” via Google with kids with disabilities from around the world

There is a lot of hostility being generated in the online worlds. I teach my history students that this is the result of fear. Fear prompts a tongue lashing, or a dismissing of people and ideas. Fear prompts distrust, disloyalty, and a vengeful spirit. There is no peace where there is fear, and the growth of hate.

The LORD is my light and my salvation;
whom should I fear?
The LORD is my life’s refuge;
of whom should I be afraid? 

Who do we hate? We hate the ones who disagree with us, who challenge us. We hate that our pope makes gaffes (like we all do – and none ex cathedra, I might add). We hate when fellow Catholics misrepresent the universal Catholic Church. The Venerable Archbishop Fulton Sheen rightly said, “Not 100 in the United States hate the Roman Catholic Church, but millions hate what they mistakenly think the Roman Catholic Church is.” The kaleidoscope of faith should keep us humble. Too often, however, we miss the irony of ourselves not showing mercy and love to others.

Blessed are they who have kept the word with a generous heart,
and yield a harvest through perseverance.

The ability to be kind in the face of cruelty is the redemption of humanity; to seek to benefit others, not just ourselves; to spread love instead of coveting it; to know the race is worth running, even when we struggle to keep up. This is what sainthood means: to be generous in this life as God is with us, and to bring Christ to others in reflection of the way He seeks us. To know of Christ and to know Christ are two different hearts.

Let brotherly love continue.
Do not neglect hospitality,
for through it some have unknowingly entertained angels.

In all our interactions, we must love. These are the greatest commandments. It is our love of God which motivates us to love our neighbor as ourself. Hospitality is in the home, yes, and in all interactions. The internet is not a safe-zone. It is a place where hearts can be met, changed, and nourished. Today, let us not be as King Herod – let us not slaughter the righteous because they mis-worded their argument, or believe something we disagree with, or fear others if we do not publicly act in a certain way.

Remember your leaders who spoke the word of God to you.
Consider the outcome of their way of life and imitate their faith.
Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever.

Jesus Christ is the same forever, no matter what someone’s Facebook post or Tweet said. Let the Lord be our light!

{Originally posted at Ignitum Today}

Sacred Heart, Change My Heart

Today is the Solemnity of the Sacred Heart of Jesus. The feast was requested in reparation for the ingratitude for the sacrifice that Christ made for us. This feast day also means we can eat meat today (Canon 1251), which is another reason to rejoice.

I have a special devotion to the Sacred Heart of Jesus. The image of Jesus and his Sacred Heart was on my fridge during my childhood. In college, the Sacred Heart helped me discern marriage as my vocation in life. After college, I prayed to the Sacred Heart to let me lose my want of marriage and for me to bear fruit during my single period. By Christmas, I did. I was completely happy and content as a single person. As blessings befall, I met my to-be husband Will a week or so later.

I prayed a Sacred Heart novena before Will and I started dating: for Will to show initiative, and for me to be content in whatever happened in the course of our relationship. In those months leading up to our engagement, it was the first relationship I felt free to love and be loved; I also felt comfortable enough that, even though we loved each other, if it did not work out, I could have broken up with him with a knowing heart. We talked about it, even, as we talked towards marriage. It was Christ alone who put such peace in my heart.

The modern devotion to the Sacred Heart of Jesus was led by Sr. Marguerite Marie Alacoque, a French nun and mystic who lived from 1647 to 1690. She had visions of Christ and increased devotion to the Sacred Heart. If people keep this devotion, our Lord told Sr. Marguerite Marie, he promises 12 things:

1. I will give them all the graces necessary for their state of life.
2. I will give peace in their families.
3. I will console them in all their troubles.
4. I will be their refuge in life and especially in death.
5. I will abundantly bless all their undertakings.
6. Sinners shall find in my Heart the source and infinite ocean of mercy.
7. Tepid souls shall become fervent.
8. Fervent souls shall rise speedily to great perfection.
9. I will bless those places wherein the image of my Sacred Heart shall be exposed and venerated.
10. I will give to priests the power to touch the most hardened hearts.
11. Persons who propagate this devotion shall have their names eternally written in my Heart.
12. In the excess of the mercy of my Heart, I promise you that my all powerful love will grant to all those who will receive Communion on the First Fridays, for nine consecutive months, the grace of final repentance: they will not die in my displeasure, nor without receiving the sacraments; and my Heart will be their secure refuge in that last hour.

“And He [Christ] showed me that it was His great desire of being loved by men and of withdrawing them from the path of ruin that made Him form the design of manifesting His Heart to men, with all the treasures of love, of mercy, of grace, of sanctification and salvation which it contains, in order that those who desire to render Him and procure Him all the honour and love possible, might themselves be abundantly enriched with those divine treasures of which His heart is the source.”
— from Revelations of Our Lord to St. Mary Margaret Alacoque

Pope Leo XIII consecrated the world to the Sacred Heart in 1899. The Sacred Heart novena starts, “O my Jesus, you have said: “Truly I say to you, ask and you will receive, seek and you will find, knock and it will be opened to you.” Behold I knock, I seek and ask for the grace of [mention the purpose of your prayer]”

Then, your intention(s), followed by an Our Father, Hail Mary and Glory Be, and ends, “Sacred Heart of Jesus, I place all my trust in you. Amen.”

The Sacred Heart of Jesus is my go-to prayer for all of the ups and down in our marriage, and I feel so grateful for the ability to stay close to his heart when I feel the winds push hard against my life.

Thank you, Jesus! Your Sacred Heart continues to change my heart.

Originally posted at Ignitum Today

Book Review: Under the Influence of Jesus

Under the Influence of Jesus: The Transforming Experience of Encountering Christ by Joe Paprocki (Loyola Press, 168 pages, $15.95)

Disclaimer: This book was sent to me by Loyola Press for my honest review.

Accessible, humorous, earnest, and faithful are all words I would use to describe the latest book by Joe Paprocki, a national consultant on faith formation for Loyola Press.

Paprocki discusses what a relationship with Jesus is and is not, and how it manifests in our hearts. What happens when we are truly inebriated with the love of Christ is a “subtle but observable” transformation in our personal lives, one to prompt others to ask us about our joy (1 Peter 3:15).

The book is manageable, sitting under 200 pages. The writing style is conversational. Paprocki frequently invokes modern culture to help make a clear picture or better connection for the reader. For people looking to have a more intimate, sincere relationship with Jesus, he also gives practical advice about how best to start, grow, and truly know the greatness of our God.

I love Papracki’s advice on “vision therapy” and how to daily engage your senses to recognize God in your life. He shows a very real and alive faith, and explains the habits we can form to encourage our journey to carry our own cross.

Too often, people feel pressure to “be” a certain kind of Christian. Paprocki writes, “Likewise, the Gospels make it clear that following Jesus, while transformative at the spiritual level, does not require us to become something we are not. Rather, we are to become a more authentic version of who we are, continuing to do what we do but with a new, single-hearted focus.” In Christ, we are fully ourselves, and we use our unique gifts to help serve the Church and our fellow humans. Peter and Paul were both essential to the Church, just as Mary and Martha served the Lord in different ways. It is in our individuality that joy is made manifest to many.

The book shows the multi-faceted sides of our Lord, and warmly brings the reader in; the Scripture passages used feel well-timed and placed. Paprocki reminds us that “Jesus does not desire fans who cheer from the sidelines but rather friends who will roll up their sleeves and work shoulder to shoulder with him to build the kingdom of God.” Discipleship is an invitation for more; a desire planted in the heart to serve.

Paprocki invites the readers to personally know Jesus: the Word made flesh - for “it touched heaven, but it stood upon the earth” (Wisdom 18:16). This book is worth studying and savoring in the pursuit to best know our faith. The title of the book refers to the centuries old prayer Anima Christi: “Soul of Christ, sanctify me; Body of Christ, save me; Blood of Christ, inebriate me.” The book encourages us all to experience life in Christ, and with him.

Originally posted at Ignitum Today

Daily Readings: Your Grief Will Become Joy

Friday of the Sixth Week of Easter mass readings

The responsorial response sets the tone for today’s readings: “God is king of all the earth.”

The first readings in Acts, Paul passed on a message from the Lord: ““Do not be afraid. Go on speaking, and do not be silent, for I am with you. No one will attack and harm you, for I have many people in this city.”

The Jews went up against Paul, saying,“This man is inducing people to worship God contrary to the law.” The governor of the province dismissed the case, saying that as their complaint was about doctrine and titles, and not any “crime or malicious fraud” – so he would not judge it. The Jews, in turn, publicly beat a synagogue official in retribution, and Paul stayed quiet and left for Syria (then shaved his head, because he made a vow).

It is not hard to picture the above scene: Paul is going against the human response of squashing truth by any means possible, including in violation of religious laws. The cards are stacked and the schism is felt: Christianity has arrived, and they are attracting more and more followers. By publicly attempting to control Paul’s message, the Jews were attempting to put fear in his (and other Christians’s hearts); but Christ came for peace, in our hearts and in the world. And so we keep quiet, when necessary, and continue to carry on with our mission. Paul did not gloat that the case was thrown out and he did not verbally attack or taunt – he kept quiet, so the ease the pain many of those people may have been feelings.

Fear often motivates bullying. In the Gospel, another side of feeling overly burdened:

Jesus said to his disciples:
“Amen, amen, I say to you, you will weep and mourn,
while the world rejoices;
you will grieve, but your grief will become joy.
When a woman is in labor, she is in anguish because her hour has arrived;
but when she has given birth to a child,
she no longer remembers the pain because of her joy
that a child has been born into the world.
So you also are now in anguish.
But I will see you again, and your hearts will rejoice,
and no one will take your joy away from you.
On that day you will not question me about anything.
Amen, amen, I say to you,
whatever you ask the Father in my name he will give you.”

And when you ask God the Father for a new car, please be aware that the Gospel is not about material possessions any more than it is about winning Facebook arguments. There will be pain and suffering – even an epidural will not take away birth pangs or the effort that goes into bringing a new creation forth into the world. There is goodness in the struggle; there is light in the darkness.

I have noticed, especially in the Catholic blogosphere, the permeance of negativity. Instead of seeking Truth, we seek to Be Right – and often on topics that are going to be differences of opinion. For some of those topics, the Church gives us nice parameters. On other topics, we must reasonably discuss with compassion. For though God is the king of all, our world is still permeated with sin. We still grieve, and we still cling to our joy.

We must not be afraid to share the Gospel and the Good News: we must also not be afraid to let go of hurts and the ability to belittle another. We must know that our fellow Christians are supporting each other, loving each other, even when we misunderstand each other. The best advice a priest ever gave me was this: “You do not have to like a person, but you must love them.”

When we love each other, we curate joy. God gives us the grace to overcome our sins and glorify the Kingdom. And when in doubt, sing this in response: “All you peoples, clap your hands,/ shout to God with cries of gladness,/ For the LORD, the Most High, the awesome,/ is the great king over all the earth.”

His will be done: may our words and deeds be blessed, and may we be silent as Paul was, if necessary, in order to further the message of hope and love.

Originally posted at Ignitum Today

When People Make Mistakes (But Not You!)

Life, in all its glory, is pretty messy. Sin skips and trips us through life as we try to be faithful and nothing halts us up more than the compare and contrast game.

You know the game: Why did she do that? Can you believe he said that? I would never…

You would never… lie or cheat, commit adultery or covet your neighbor’s good fortune, speak poorly about another to the advantage of your own reputation?

The golden rule — to love our neighbors as ourselves — is not a friendly suggestion:  It is a commandment of God, and it teaches our heart to love until it hurts. And it will hurt, sometimes. Loving another does not mean liking them. It means giving them the benefit of the doubt, holding your own tongue from a harsh rebuke, gentle counseling when they are taking the wrong path, and forgiving.

It means training your mind to combat the vices planted by jealousy: why not me?

Instead of why-not-me, try, What does God have planned for me?

We all have a different story to tell, a different vocation to fulfill, and our own life to lead. None of us are in charted waters all our life; mistakes will happen. Things will not go as planned; but do not give up hope! God wants the kind of relationship where you wrestle together through the rough patches, like Jacob, unwilling to let go until he received his blessing.

As Holy Week approaches, let us remember that Christ died for us and our sins, and your neighbor and his sins, and that lady who honked her horn at you, and the co-worker whose jokes rub you the wrong way, and the guy who would not just take a hint. Instead of stewing, turn toward prayer. The Book of Lamentations, Job and the Psalms are full of frustrations.

Saint Ambrose wrote in Explanatio Psalmorum (XII, 1, 4, 7-12),

“In the book of Psalms, the way for progress for all men is to be found, and there lies the medicine for the health of all. Whoever reads it, will find the way to cure the wounds of one’s own defects with a specific prescription. Whoever takes the trouble to look at it will find, as on a training ground for virtues, various kinds of exhibitions. And one can choose for oneself, whatever one considers most suitable. The prize is thus more easily within one’s grasp.”

The reality is, we are humans prone to sin. Only God is infallible, and it is wisdom that recognizes our own fallibility as well as that of others’. Instead to dismissing or condemning, we should see others’ weaknesses as an opportunity to be a non-judgmental listener, a support system, and/or, someone to pray with and for them, and hope that they see our own weaknesses in a similar merciful light.

It does no good to say or think: If I had been in that situation, I would have acted differently. We can only learn, and lean more on God. Jesus, I trust in you. Holy Spirit, fill me with courage – give me the words to say.

The sooner we remember that we are responsible for loving God above all and our neighbors as ourselves, the sooner we can forgive as our Heavenly Father forgives, and love as our Heavenly Father loves.

Originally post at Ignitum Today.

Another Shoe To Fill, Another Branch To Grow

Ignitum Today has a new Editor-in-chief... and it is me!



Please pray for me in this new role, and thank you for all your encouragement!

"All of us belong to the communion of Saints, we who have been baptized in the name of the Father, and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, we who draw life from the gift of Christ’s Body and Blood, through which he transforms us and makes us like himself. Yes, the Church is alive – this is the wonderful experience of these days. During those sad days of the Pope’s illness and death, it became wonderfully evident to us that the Church is alive. And the Church is young. She holds within herself the future of the world and therefore shows each of us the way towards the future. The Church is alive and we are seeing it: we are experiencing the joy that the Risen Lord promised his followers. The Church is alive – she is alive because Christ is alive, because he is truly risen. In the suffering that we saw on the Holy Father’s face in those days of Easter, we contemplated the mystery of Christ’s Passion and we touched his wounds. But throughout these days we have also been able, in a profound sense, to touch the Risen One. We have been able to experience the joy that he promised, after a brief period of darkness, as the fruit of his resurrection. 

The Church is alive – with these words, I greet with great joy and gratitude all of you gathered here, my venerable brother Cardinals and Bishops, my dear priests, deacons, Church workers, catechists. I greet you, men and women Religious, witnesses of the transfiguring presence of God. I greet you, members of the lay faithful, immersed in the great task of building up the Kingdom of God which spreads throughout the world, in every area of life. With great affection I also greet all those who have been reborn in the sacrament of Baptism but are not yet in full communion with us; and you, my brothers and sisters of the Jewish people, to whom we are joined by a great shared spiritual heritage, one rooted in God’s irrevocable promises. Finally, like a wave gathering force, my thoughts go out to all men and women of today, to believers and non-believers alike." -- Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI, during the homily of his inaugural mass

Under His Mercy!

#7QT: Will, Fourth Wise Man

It's Friday, Friday... Hi to Jen and y'all!

{one}

Writing is more fun than packing. I wrote The ABCs of Gift Giving for The Imaginative Conservative and hey-o! You should check it out.

More Advent posts to come too so stay tuned... I really like this one.

{two}

I've been dressing Grace all wrong...

Will (to Grace): What are you wearing?! It looks like a kitten wearing an astronaut suit! You look ridiculous!
Julie: I think that is an owl...
Will (upon inspecting more closely): Ah yes, an owl. Still looks like a kitten in an astronaut suit.

Will: How do you like not wearing pants?
Grace:
Will: I don't like your pants. They have a reindeer on the butt, and then people look at your butt.
Grace:
Will: It's all about the precedent, Grace!

Grace is not amused.

{three}

Or have I??

Practicing kicks!

Sitting on the bed, helping me pack... or distracting me, either one

{four}

Okay, I know you've all been waiting with baited breath... our Christmas decorations:

O [first] Christmas tree!

Grace is getting her stocking for Christmas from Mimi!

Yes, Jesus is already out. 

{five}

If you're on FB, I'm sure you've seen the request to share your favorite ten books (not thinking too hard, just the ones that have really stood out to you); here are mine:

DRUM ROLL. {in alphabetical order}

The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
Go Down, Moses by William Faulkner
Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl
The End of the Affair by Graham Greene
The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe by C.S. Lewis
Anne of the Island by L.M. Montgomery
Shizuko's Daughter by Kyoko Mori
Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy
All the King's Men by Robert Penn Warren
The Loved One by Evelyn Waugh

{six}

December TBM Topic #36: "Feast Days and Holidays" 

Christmas is the feast day of Jesus' birth, and it's also an occasion of Santa Claus. Where does liturgical living come in - celebrating feast days as well as national holidays! How they are both important to celebrate? People do parades for Fourth of July, start playing Christmas music after Halloween -- and what about Our Lady of Guadalupe? Or the anniversary of our Baptism? Celebrating our birthday and our Confirmation saint's day! How do you see it?

Join us!

{seven}

Staring contest. Anddddd go!

Pals!

Happy days, y'all!

#7QT: Kill with Kindness

Four days till my due date... and that's all the baby news I have. Holla back to Jen!

{one}

Pope Francis and his awesome interview - my thoughts here at Ignitum Today, "Whom Would Kindness Kill More: Them or You?" on the interview and the spiritual work of mercy of comforting the afflicted.

{two}

This week I made two larger meals out of the ground beef we bought. One was spaghetti and meatballs, the other was a casserole. Will does not like cooked vegetables, which is a good reminder to me to think more before I make a big meal of foods I like, because then I have to finish them. Since we don't eat meat on Fridays, this pushes leftovers back even further. Sadly, I am already over both these meals (and ground beef) and onto my next culinary adventure dreams...

Crock pot time!

Will requested a rump roast, and I found this recipe for Pioneer Woman’s Perfect Pot Roast; its only flaw is that it lacks potatoes, though, which we have an abundance of - it seems like I could add more vegetables too (for my own benefit).

Natalie of The Busy Budgeting Mama posted Round 3 of her freezer crock pot meals, and they look delicious. She also posted the recipes + grocery list, because she is an angel.

I also found this recipe for balsamic vinaigrette, Will's favorite dressing, so we can eat happy salad this week. BOOM. VEGETABLES.

Do y'all have any favorite crock pot or make ahead meals?

{three}

The Myers-Briggs test - have you ever had yourself personality tested? Will and I took it at our pre-cana retreat, and I'm glad I wrote it down for reference! I am an ISFJ (married to a ESTP! Which, I was thrilled to read later, is the natural pair to my personality - isn't that fascinating?).

I mention it because Jen asked in her 7QT, if our personality was a song, what would it be?

I've picked Natalie Merchant's "Wonder":



What is your personality type?! What is your song? (It's subjective - just pick one!)

{four}

The coolest part of reading my personality "portrait" were my different career starting points:

ISFJs have two basic traits which help define their best career direction: 1) they are extremely interested and in-tune with how other people are feeling, and 2) they enjoy creating structure and order, and are extremely good at it. Ideally, the ISFJ will choose a career in which they can use their exceptional people-observation skills to determine what people want or need, and then use their excellent organizational abilities to create a structured plan or environment for achieving what people want.

One of my possible career paths is child care, and as silly as it sounds, it was exactly what I needed to read today. Nannying for almost two years was my most favorite job - more than writing, more than editing. I have high hopes for this mommy job!

{five}

Here is a just found picture from my MIL's camera! Will and I where we got engaged, 6 months into our marriage, right before we moved to NOLA.

{six}

Okay people, taking a poll about my bloggy-blog. I'm thinking of changing the name to "The Julie View" (same as my Twitter handle) from "The Corner with a View" (for simplicity's sake). I'm not in the mood to start a new blog, just fixin' up the original for now. May even add a tagline... and an actual, personalized header!

{seven}

I miss my family! But they're having a good time anyways.

Four of the six of us

The dogs in my sister's high school uniform shirts

Oh hey, E!

Happy Friday, everybody!!

Pro-Life Compassion

In the 2011 film Friends With Kids, two platonic friends decide to have a child together without the entanglements of marriage (which they saw as tearing their other friends's relationships apart). A year or so after their child is born, Jason (the father) meets "The One" and at their initial meeting, he explains that yes, he has a kid, but no, he is not in a relationship. She, in turn, asks he knocked up a Catholic girl.

 It's possibly my favorite part of the movie, which is not saying much. Friends With Kids was a very bleak look at having kids, and the lack of proper communication between the adults was surely everyone's downfall. But it was a strangely pro-life film. Even with the adults crying and getting their knickers into a twist, there were kids running around everywhere. I think they were supposed to seem annoying and unruly, but I enjoyed their vibrancy and the liveliness they offered to the  film.

Kids!

Moreover, all the parents had their kids on purpose. All the children were "wanted". By the end of the film, the very character who had been criticizing kids being brought to fancy restaurants at the beginning was now staring at them with doe-eyes and compassion, and asking the parents how old they were. For the first time in the whole movie, a character showed real compassion toward the lives of children.

 The main characters, who avidly hate organized religion (their words, not mine), would more than likely be contemptuous of the pro-life movement, and really, any one who did not wholly support their decision-making process. But would they really have been as rabid as what we saw in Texas? The yelling, the signs, and the insinuations that "my body, my decision" means that fellow women cannot plead and pray, men have no say in the decision-making process, and the child inside is not its own autonomy.

As Mary C. Tillotson wrote in "Disabled Babies, Moms, and Men: Can We Please Love Them All?", " If we really need to turn men into straw men and tear them down, we’re buying into the (false) idea that men really are superior and all we can do is mope about it and resent everything. If we honestly believe that men and women really are equal in worth and dignity, we won’t feel threatened when a man speaks with kindness or offers to help." As this is the end of NFP Awareness Week, I wanted to make suggestions for a more fruitful and successful pro-life attitude and movement. It starts small, with every person.

1. Pray

 It is more than praying ceaselessly (1 Thessalonians 5:17), and adding "the unborn" to prayer intentions - we must earnestly pray for women (especially those in domestic violence situations, and victims of sexual assault and rape); pray for people's hearts to be open to life, to understand its sanctity, and to uphold human dignity; for men; for all families affected. We must broaden our understanding of what it means to be "pro-life" to include the care and love of every single human being - especially those we disagree with, and who cause us frustration and anger.

2. Watch your thoughts, curb your words 

Never, ever, ever say "baby killer" to a person who is pro-choice. First of all, they do not see their decision as killing a baby. They see it as preventing a baby from being born. The difference may seem "tomato/ tomatoe" but it is that sliver of mercy that justifies their actions. Empathy is what these mothers need; it is called a "difficult decision" for a reason. They are not debating that. These women need healing too, and just as often, so do the men. It is too easy to look at people who use contraception, have abortions, are pro-choice and think, They are taking the easy way out. They are not taking responsibility for their actions. But you too are doing that if you allow yourself to think this way: you are guiding your thoughts to not be loving. You are not actively seeking their best interests if you so easily dismiss people. Do not let other people's mistakes be your downfall.

3. No yelling, ever.

Who likes being yelled at? Does that make you listen better to other people's arguments? I don't think so. (This includes yelling over social media, peeps.)

4. No judging why a person is pregnant, no matter how old or the circumstances around it

Can you imagine becoming pregnant when you were not trying, and not in a supportive environment? That sounds terrifying to me. I can't imagine how I'd react if my husband did not want our child, or my family shunned me. These are realities many, many, many people face. If we truly believe every baby is a gift, then we must act respectful and supportive to all moms, and let them know they are "wanted" as well as their child. Many women and men are not blessed with having excellent chastity education (or any at all!) which teaches them to value their bodies (and others). Instead, many retaliate against any feelings of unjust shame or curiosity by "taking control of their sexuality" by being sexuality active. This is different than understanding one's fertility, and both are important to learn.

  Be merciful, then, as your Father is merciful. Judge nobody, and you will not be judged; condemn nobody, and you will not be condemned; forgive, and you will be forgiven. Give, and gifts will be yours; good measure, pressed down and shaken up and running over, will be poured into your lap; the measure you award to others is the measure that will be awarded to you. (Luke 6:36-38)

  5. Helping and befriending the moms

These moms are scared. Bringing a baby into the world is a huge responsibility, whether or not the mother chooses to raise it or offer it for adoption. Heck, I was scared when I first realized I was pregnant, and I was married and in a stable, loving relationship with a supportive family. My parish priest told me that it was okay to be scared - Mary was certainly frightened when the angel came to her with the message that she had been chosen to carry the Son of God. This is why he said, "Be not afraid!" This is why her "Yes!" to the Lord is so significant - she was taking on another human life to nourish and love and bring into this world. This is no small feat.

 Helping and befriending these moms means supporting them emotionally and physically (hello diapers and wipes!), and hopefully, spiritually. If the mom decides to keep her child, she is making a life sacrifice. If a mom decides to give her baby up for adoption, she is making another sacrifice - after carrying her baby to term, she may never see that child again, but always wonder what he/she is up to in the world. This is an ache no water can quench.

 Volunteering at crisis pregnancy centers is an excellent way to support mothers: and if counseling is not your strong suit, there is still plenty of work to do in sorting, office management, answering phones, and helping the other workers.

 The most important thing we can do in this world is love our fellow brothers and sisters in Christ - this is not a suggestion either, but a command. We love and learn humility, learn meekness, learn sacrifice. Let us help each other get to Heaven, especially those who need God the most.  

Any more suggestions, dear readers?

[Originally posted at Ignitum Today]

Good Intentions Pave the Road

Yes, it really is Friday. And the last one in April, to boot!

Thanks for hosting Jen!

ONE

My awesome editor at Ignitum Today, Stacy "The Boss" Trasancos, is the best. These past few months for me have been trying, especially from the personal stand point that I've hardly had time to edit/ publish my scribblings - particularly ones I've been asked to do, like book reviews.

She's given this piece of advice so many times, it almost hit me in the head once I realized it applied to me too: whenever one of the writers freaks out because deadline is looming and something else has come up, she tells them,

Don't worry. Life and family comes first.

Huh. That certainly isn't rocket science. (Her Ph.D. is in Chemistry, anyways.)

But when I was feeling bogged down by work and pregnancy nausea and trying to support my husband while we lived an hour and a half apart most of the week, I remembered what she said and decided to give my two weeks notice at my part-time job. It's the first time I've put my new family before any sort of job before (in a big way, at least), and it feels really right. Begone stress!

TWO

Do you follow Pope Francis on Twitter? WHY NOT?! The man is our spiritual leader, and gives us daily tidbits (in multiple languages too!). Today's tweet is: Dear young people, do not bury your talents, the gifts God has given you! Do not be afraid to dream of great things!

Oh, and THIS: 

Totes does: https://www.facebook.com/CatholicMemebase

THREE

Did I say "pregnancy nausea"? Whoops. Nausea so bad I've been on medicine, naps and 64 oz of water a day since February? Okay, yes. I am pregnant!! Here's a picture of me at 17 weeks:

Baby bumpin'.

You can't tell -- as much -- when I'm with all my siblings:

What a good looking bunch!

FOUR

Looking for a super awesome cookbook to use? I highly recommend Cheap. Fast. Good. by Beverly Mills and Alicia Ross. My mom bought it for me when I was first living on my own as a statehouse reporter, but I've really put it to use in married life. The recipes are delicious, they use every day ingredients plus tell you how much it will cost to make per serving, and the authors give tons of newbie advice, especially great for those new-ish to navigating the grocery store on a budget (but also for people in general!).

FIVE

I'm also reading Bringing Up Bebe: One American Mother Discovers the Wisdom of French Parenting by Pamela Druckerman. No, I'm not a Francophile - but neither is the author, which is what makes the book work so well. She was a WSJ journalist who met her English husband on assignment, stopped working for the paper, moved to France and married her beau, and - lo and behold! - had herself some bebes. This book is creative nonfiction and a fascinating study of French parenting. The biggest thing I've taken away is that I will also teach my bebe to sleep through the night by four months, and I can eat sushi and brie if I'm really careful. Yes, my stomach is reading this book too. I really recommend it; read with a grain of sea salt... what am I saying. Read it while eating a baguette!

SIX

That book is also encouraging my love of cheese.

Oui-oui, s'il vous plait!

SEVEN

Reminder that April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month! I'll be publishing something by the end of the month, and if any of you have a story or post, please share it with us on the Bright Maidens FB page. Four days left!

Have a wonderful Friday, y'all! I'm finishing up my part-time job work and then I start a weekend babysitting job tomorrow at 8 a.m. The fun don't stop!!

Proverbs 31: Woman of Action

There is a great fear among women that we are being under-appreciated. It’s not that we women want all the power; we just want credit for sharing it! In Amanda Mortus’s “To Be Used or Appreciated?”, she laments how tired a Proverbs 31 woman seems, and wishes more of those holy verses spoke intimately of her heart and character.

“Yes, she does all these things, but who is she?” implores Ms. Mortus.

Two Sundays ago, we heard “What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone says he has faith but does not have works?” (James 2:14). The September 2012 issue of The Magnificat focuses specifically on work as the blessing of the month, and features a passage from Blessed John Paul II:

“Work is not only good in the sense that it is useful or something to enjoy; it is also good as being something worthy, that is to say, something that corresponds to man’s dignity, that expresses this dignity and increases it… Work is a good thing for man – a good thing for his humanity – because through work man not only transforms nature, adapting it to his own needs, but he also achieves fulfillment as a human being and indeed in a sense becomes ‘more of a human being.’ (Laborem Exercens #9) 

 The Proverbs 31 woman may be tired, and she is also satisfied. She has “strength and dignity and laughs at the days to come” (Prv 31:25), which directly correlates to all the mentioned work she does. And why is that? Because she has joy in serving others; she “works with willing hands” (Prv 31:13). She is an ordinary woman who respects her husband and has his utmost trust, loves and is celebrated by her family, whom takes responsibility for the running of her household, and knows where she can be of use. She may have worries, but she “does not eat the bread of idleness” (Prv 31:27).

Women have the amazing opportunity to share their gifts and talents with their family and in their community. Whatever a woman’s role, may she speak out of “her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue” (Prv 31:26). In contrast to Ms. Mortus’s speculation, these verses are not so outwardly focused but rather inward; her character is shown through her actions. It is a classic “faith with works” collaboration. Without a woman’s love, her actions would not yield laudable results. Without a woman’s actions, her love would grown barren.

As St. Paul wrote, “We urge you, brothers, to progress even more, and to aspire to live a tranquil life, to mind your own affairs, and to work with your hands, as we instruct you” (1 Thes 4:10-11). This is the essence of such a virtuous woman described in Proverbs 31 and is not meant as a disheartening load, but an encouraging example.

This is the beauty of a Proverbs 31 woman: she gets the job done. She doesn’t complain or seek recognition for her deeds; she does what is necessary out of love and she moves around from her flax to the fields to the merchants to her family. We are shown her character – she has discipline, patience and perseverance – and her heart: she seeks no reward outside God’s provisions. She laughs at the future because she is content today.

How many of us can claim such inner peace?

Originally posted at Ignitum Today!

Not So Complicated

Flying home, the college lady next to me mentioned she was in a “complicated” relationship with someone back home. I smiled and said I’d been there.

“Make sure you draw clear lines,” I said. “Relationships don’t have to be complicated.”

Perhaps this sounds too simplistic – as I fear the lady took it – because life itself is full of complications. But if it’s the wrong time for one person, it’s the wrong person for both parties. If this is the case, it is time to step back and seek perspective on what God could have planned for us during this season of our life.

In Isaiah, God says that he knew us before we were knit in our mother’s womb. In Tobit, he speaks of putting two people together before they were born. Yet, this is not to say that one specific person is destined to only be with another specific person. A highly romantic notion, to be sure, but also an unlikely one. That idea puts limitations on God’s creation and takes away the beauty of two people who choose to marry, verses two people whom accept that they are destined to be married.

Love is of God, and God allows people to be compatible with more than one person, just as people could be happy and able to do many different jobs or live in a variety of locations. God works between the cracks of choice and acts of free will. God has plans for us: follow his commandments, love and be loved. The rest is expendable.

It is easy to talk about the hook-up culture, tsk at the people who participate, explain intellectually why playing with such emotions through a physical relationship is damaging in the long-term; but in the short-term, it is much, much harder to break out of it. The people involved are not looking for easy love – they’re looking for any kind of love. They want authentic love and they’re scared it might pass them by. They have a hard time grasping an emotion without a touch, a pursuit without a guarantee, a promise worth forever.

The place to start is yourself and with the company you keep. When you ask your friends for advice, do you often turn to God as well? He is no fair-weathered friend. He may know all, but he still wants you to ask and show that you value him. Make time to pray and find quiet within so as to listen better. Frequent the sacraments for grace and read the day’s mass readings. God talks to all of us through the Holy Scripture.

The more we turn to God as our friend, the more readily our complicated situation will have more light shed upon it and the right road shall be easier to tread.

Originally posted at Ignitum Today

Christ, My Wingman

The morning after my future sister’s wedding, my fiance and I attended the family brunch and were asked the question: short or long engagement?

B. said “short” and I said “long” – the listeners laughed.

Fiance and me

We’ve been engaged for eight months now; four more months to go. It’s been a struggle intertwined with the joy of deepening our relationship and connections. As B. prepares to apply for residencies, I’m working, planning our wedding and preparing to transition into married life. We’ve made budgets and meshed five year plans. I’ve decided to delay grad school and he’s studied for and taken test after test following each rotation.

And that’s love, we’ve been told – let each struggle bring you closer together and closer to God, they say. But those practicalities are not even the hardest part for us. No, the hardest part of our engagement is that we’re still single people.

Continue reading at Ignitum Today>>>>>>

To be cross-posted at The Spiritual Workout

Date the Fat Guys, Ladies

In what can only be described as “true love,” I agreed to marry my fiance without ever dancing with him.

Perhaps this seems impossible, improbable, or a smallish point in the grand scheme of our love. But I tell you, it is not. I come from a dancing family. My mom and dad fell in love in college through dancing (and homecoming committee), and continue to swing around the floor with passion and laughing, grooving to the music. We six kids have no formal dance training, but we have natural rhythm and a blatant disregard for awkwardness. We’ll have impromptu dance parties at home, in the car, and even public places, if the music is right. It is a pathway of love for us Robisons.

I mention B.’s and my lack of dancing during ten months of courtship because this was how I approached our relationship: taking him for who he is, accepting his limits (as he accepts mine), and letting God’s love for both of us lead. He said he wasn’t a dancer. I didn’t push him into a dancing situation until weeks after our engagement, a wedding, when I then found out he can dance. And all I can think now is, What a glorious gift from my God!

Too often, we gals imagine the most perfect looking man for us. We want our handsome knight, and we want him with a six-pack. But what of his character? Does he respect you? Is he interested in spending time with you? Could you grow together and be friends? Do you see potential in him as your life partner, through difficulties and diaper changings?

Continue reading at IGNITUM TODAY >>>>>>>

I Bet You Think This Post Is About You

The hubris of the Catholic Church is often a huge turn-off to many people. How can she, the Church, this whore (my mother), claim to know the will of God?

A Catholic Church in Munich, Germany

After all, everyone knows her reputation. Everyone knows her mistakes. Everyone believes they know all about her and her kind- those “Catholics” who “claim” to “know” about God, but really, they do dead works and worship dead people.

And yet, the Church lives and copes and, more importantly, thrives. Can that not imply the Church knows something the rest of us do not? Through her faith, she is saved. Through her works, she is sanctified.


Continue Reading at Ignitum Today >>>>>>>

Don't Buy Me Love

The little girl I babysit likes to give me her art. As it is now February, she is currently making Valentines. She asks me how to spell my name, writes the letters backwards and proudly presents it to me. I praise it, praise her and show it off. She makes sure I take it home with me, alongside the ones I made. I hang them up on my family’s fridge and in my room.

Isn't she talented?

I do not like the Valentine’s Day holiday season. I do not think the feast day of Sts. Chocolate Hearts, Red Roses and Hallmark Cards should be so elaborately celebrated. I do not like the idea of packaging Love; I do not like the commercialization of emotions. I do not like the supposed pressure couples feel to do something “special” or the unnecessary outrage of single people.

Continue Reading at  IGNITUM TODAY >>>>>>>

Not Even Wrong

Wolfgang Pauli, a physicist who pioneered the field of quantum physics, is famous for the critique, "Das ist nicht nur nicht richtig, es ist nicht einmal falsch!" Or, "Not only is it not right, it's not even wrong!"

Pauli reserved this most severe criticism for papers whose theories or theses were so unstable and not within the realm of evaluable science that they could not even be proved wrong. This, of course, coming from a man who created the Pauli principle, in which no two electrons in an atom can have the same quantum numbers. (Obviously.)

Stacy Trasancos wrote a beautiful piece today entitled "The Unity of Charity" and it prompted me to think beyond Catholic to Catholic relations, or even Catholic to Anti-Catholic relations, and into Catholic to Protestant relationships.

The "I Hate Religion But I Love Jesus" sentiment is beyond the video that went viral. Are you religious or are you redeemed?, asked a college friend of mine in seminary on Facebook. I listened to Pastor Mark Driscoll speak and I did not recognize such a religion as my own. My friend said he was speaking to Evangelicals; but such words translate into a disdain for all organized religion, especially the Roman Catholic Church.

Moreover, that kind of rhetoric has no substantial place in Christendom. It does not advance the conversation. It does not lead to unity between Christians.

Read More at IGNITUM TODAY >>>>>>>

The Blessings of Bunny Slippers

I’m wearing bunny slippers as I type this post. My late Aunt Tracey gave them to me two Christmases ago (her last Christmas). I wear them, but I don’t even like slippers. I’m not a fan of slip-on shoes. They always slip off. I wear them because Aunt Tracey gave them to me.

The author and her bunny slippers

Aunt Tracey was the super-super-glue of my Dad’s side of the family- the one who always had get-togethers to make sure we got together. She and my Uncle Mark were high school sweethearts, and she was one of my Dad’s best friends. You couldn’t help liking her. She made mostly accurate character judgments, had a sassy sense of humor, was always up-front and kind, and loved her family. The last five years of her life were spent in her home, as she battled various diseases and cancers that she would ultimately succumb to in April of 2010.

Read more at Ignitum Today>>>>>>>

What Is the Brightest Idea Told To You in 2011?

IgnitumToday has begun hosting a "Socialis Saturday" to bring the writers and commenters together in one forum. Today's topic is

What is the brightest new idea

that you had this year that

you would give as advice

to someone else?

Join us!

IgnitumToday is the new name for Virtuous Planet. For those who do not know, VP faced legal problems if the name was not changed, so change it we did! Please follow us (again!) on Facebook and Twitter!