"Woolies for the Winter": Here We Go A Wandeling

One of my best friends, Betsy Howard, and another very dear friend, Laura Kern, have started a women's publishing house, Wandeling Press, and are publishing their first children's book - "Woolies for Winter"!

Fellow Hillsdale College grads who became friends through Mars Hills Academy - a small classical school where Betsy and Laura's husband both worked - they reconnected and collaborated in lyrical poetry and beautiful watercolors.

The best part? They met their goal - for the first book! They plan on writing at least one more per season, and many other books to follow. Help stretch their goal - hear more from Betsy here!

With Betsy's finesse of language and Laura's attention to details, these books will be treasured for years to come.

1. Become a backer - today! Goal ends at midnight of December 20, 2015.
2. Share this project (They were a staff pick in Publishing - featured on Kickstarter!)
3. Follow on Facebook

Want to know more? Here's their blog.

Support Wandeling Press, get your own copy of "Woolies for Winter" and help launch a great renaissance of children's literature.

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"If you tame me, then we shall need each other."

Hello, I'm back in PA now! It took us 12 hours (including rest stops) to drive home, and it was as good as it could have been... minus, perhaps the man who started shouting obscenities at Wendy's because the person behind the counter gave him the side eye or something. He had just smiled at the girls. La la la la Grace and Laura!

This post will be a short update because I've had some sort of bug and it keeps waxing and waning (this weekend was the worst - Will ended up writing me a script on Sunday because I was so bad and that really helped), and now I'm in recovery mode.

Fortunately, my MIL was able to help Sunday through Friday. Unfortunately, she left. Fortunately, Will is on anesthesia right now, so he's usually home by the afternoon and on weekends. That has made a huge difference - especially this past weekend, when I was not in a good place to watch the girls.

It's really humbling having your husband take total care of you while you moan, are not exactly "nice" company, feel nauseous and are utterly helpless to do anything besides sort of watch the girls while they play in front of you. We're going on three years of marriage, and the word that comes to mind is "tame" - not in the calm down!! sense, but "The Little Prince" version:

What does that mean -- tame?"
"It is an act too often neglected," said the fox. "It means to establish ties."
"To establish ties?"
"Just that," said the fox. "To me, you are still nothing more than a little boy who is just like a hundred thousand other little boys. And I have no need of you. And you, on your part, have no need of me. To you I am nothing more than a fox like a hundred thousand other foxes. But if you tame me, then we shall need each other. To me, you will be unique in all the world. To you, I shall be unique in all the world....” 

It's important to need people. I reflect on my former ultra-independence, always willing to be a friend and give to others, but less willing to expose a more vulnerable side. I'm able to have that with Will, and I'm able to give more to others with his encouragement. But even before I met Will, I met and loved "The Little Prince" by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry. The stories from this other world always brings me to tears ("What is essential is invisible to the eye.") and makes me laugh and has me think.

So, of course, when my sister Marianne sent me this trailer... I immediately cheered up. Release for the US is March 18, 2016, so y'all have plenty of time to read and/ or re-read this short, concise book.

“People have forgotten this truth," the fox said. "But you mustn’t forget it. You become responsible forever for what you’ve tamed. You’re responsible for your rose.”

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Reading as Enjoyment

"Those are the important things, the permanent things.  If you are not reading The Wind in the Willows as Theodore and Edith Roosevelt and their children were reading it, then you should not read it at all.  If you are turning Tom Sawyer into a linguistic exercise with a veneer of intellectual sophistication, then you should not read Tom Sawyer—in fact, you cannot have understood a blessed thing about Tom Sawyer.  If you are reading The Jungle Book for any other reason than to enter the jungle with Mowgli, Bagheera, and Baloo, then you had best stay out of the world of art, keep to your little cubbyhole, cram yourself with pointless exercises preparatory for the SAT, a job at Microsoft, creature comforts, old age, and death." --Anthony Esolen, How Common Core Devalues Great Literature

What is a favorite book to enjoy?

Flannery O'Connor Reads "A Good Man Is Hard To Find"

Vanderbilt University - April 1959, Miss Flannery O'Connor reads her short story, "A Good Man Is Hard To Find":

There was a piercing scream from the woods, followed closely by a pistol report. "Does it seem right to you, lady, that one is punished a heap and another ain't punished at all?" 

"Jesus!" the old lady cried. "You've got good blood! I know you wouldn't shoot a lady! I know you come from nice people! Pray! Jesus, you ought not to shoot a lady. I'll give you all the money I've got! 

"Lady," The Misfit said, looking beyond her far into the woods, "there never was a body that give the undertaker a tip." 

There were two more pistol reports and the grandmother raised her head like a parched old turkey hen crying for water and called, "Bailey Boy, Bailey Boy!" as if her heart would break. 

"Jesus was the only One that ever raised the dead," The Misfit continued, "and He shouldn't have done it. He shown everything off balance. If He did what He said, then it's nothing for you to do but thow away everything and follow Him, and if He didn't, then it's nothing for you to do but enjoy the few minutes you got left the best way you can by killing somebody or burning down his house or doing some other meanness to him. No pleasure but meanness," he said and his voice had become almost a snarl.

Vivian and I sitting on Flannery O'Connor's porch in Georgia. (February 2011)

What a writer; what a lady.

#7QT: Will, Fourth Wise Man

It's Friday, Friday... Hi to Jen and y'all!

{one}

Writing is more fun than packing. I wrote The ABCs of Gift Giving for The Imaginative Conservative and hey-o! You should check it out.

More Advent posts to come too so stay tuned... I really like this one.

{two}

I've been dressing Grace all wrong...

Will (to Grace): What are you wearing?! It looks like a kitten wearing an astronaut suit! You look ridiculous!
Julie: I think that is an owl...
Will (upon inspecting more closely): Ah yes, an owl. Still looks like a kitten in an astronaut suit.

Will: How do you like not wearing pants?
Grace:
Will: I don't like your pants. They have a reindeer on the butt, and then people look at your butt.
Grace:
Will: It's all about the precedent, Grace!

Grace is not amused.

{three}

Or have I??

Practicing kicks!

Sitting on the bed, helping me pack... or distracting me, either one

{four}

Okay, I know you've all been waiting with baited breath... our Christmas decorations:

O [first] Christmas tree!

Grace is getting her stocking for Christmas from Mimi!

Yes, Jesus is already out. 

{five}

If you're on FB, I'm sure you've seen the request to share your favorite ten books (not thinking too hard, just the ones that have really stood out to you); here are mine:

DRUM ROLL. {in alphabetical order}

The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
Go Down, Moses by William Faulkner
Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl
The End of the Affair by Graham Greene
The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe by C.S. Lewis
Anne of the Island by L.M. Montgomery
Shizuko's Daughter by Kyoko Mori
Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy
All the King's Men by Robert Penn Warren
The Loved One by Evelyn Waugh

{six}

December TBM Topic #36: "Feast Days and Holidays" 

Christmas is the feast day of Jesus' birth, and it's also an occasion of Santa Claus. Where does liturgical living come in - celebrating feast days as well as national holidays! How they are both important to celebrate? People do parades for Fourth of July, start playing Christmas music after Halloween -- and what about Our Lady of Guadalupe? Or the anniversary of our Baptism? Celebrating our birthday and our Confirmation saint's day! How do you see it?

Join us!

{seven}

Staring contest. Anddddd go!

Pals!

Happy days, y'all!

Do You Try Too?

From Dandelion Wine by Ray Bradbury (Douglas' best friend has just moved away): 

"Tom," said Douglas, "just promise me one thing, okay?"
"It's a promise. What?"
"You may be my brother and maybe I hate you sometimes, but stick around, all right?"
"You mean you'll let me follow you and the older guys when you go on hikes?"
"Well... sure... even that. What I mean is, don't go away, huh? Don't let any cars run over you or fall off a cliff."
"I should say not! Whatta you think I am, anyway?"

"'Cause if worst comes to worst, and both of us are real old - say
forty or forty-five some day - we can own a gold mine out West and sit
there smoking corn silk and growing beards."
"Growing beards! Boy!"
"Like I say, you stick around and don't let nothing happen."
"You can depend on me," said Tom.
"It's not you I worry about," said Douglas. "It's the way God runs the world."
Tom thought about this for a moment.
"He's all right, Doug," said Tom. "He tries."

#7QT: Hey Jealousy

Apparently it is Friday... I am losing all track of the days. Thanks to Jen, Cari & co. for keeping "it" going! (psst, look at Cari's awesome post about her awesome book)

ONE

Okay, I am giving myself 15 minutes to write this post as Will paces back and forth with Miss Fussykins, a.k.a. Grace Harriet, the newest member of the Baldwin Bunch. (Birth story here for those late to the game!)

Yawn.

This morning, I woke up with the newest emotion to add to my "new mom emotion spectrum": jealousy. I was wildly jealous of how Grace just plopped to back to sleep after her morning feedings because "someone" kept me up till 2 a.m.

Instead of getting mad, I sang this song instead:



I saw them in concert a few years ago with my cousin Sarah... it was free, and awesome. Grace and I also jump in the car, but the cops don't chase us around. I also thought his song was "Hey Jessie" growing up, but we all know Rick Springfield already tapped that for a title.

TWO

If you want delicious reads to appear in your inbox each day, may I recommend subscribing to Prufrock: Books, Art, Ideas by Micah Mattix via The American Conservative? Just lovely. Subscribe here!

THREE

In college, my Latin professor loved telling us that at school, you could study, sleep or socialize - that is, pick two out of those three. I hated that advice, but maybe because my socialization usually fell through the cracks - clubs, newspaper writing, Kappa, eating, etc.

Now that I am an adult, I wonder: what are the three things one can do in a day, and then pick two of them? I've decided it's clean - write - take care of baby. (Coffee, eating and sleep are non-negotiable!)

What are your three?

FOUR

In honor of Blessed John Paul II's feast day on October 22:

FIVE

If someone told you they were considering converting to Catholicism and asked you to weigh in, what would you say? A friend asked me this week. Now, I've been blessed to have a couple friends convert and talk me through their thoughts, and pray with them, and pray for them. But every person is different, and so my answer is never quite the same... but it always comes back to the Eucharist for me. The whole of life stems from that, what it means, and our physical encounter with Christ.

Perhaps that is why my favorite part of mass is, "Lord, I am not worthy to have you come under my roof; but only say the word, and my soul shall be healed."

SIX

In a fit of exhaustion earlier this week, after finally settling Grace down for her nap, I threw myself on the bed and my glasses broke. Join me in mourning the loss of my dear friends.

I know Grace; I'm really sad too!

SEVEN

Annnnnnnd Grace is still sobbing. But here's a cute picture of her to go! My friend Kate got her a "Future Senator" hat.

Her dad doesn't want her to go into politics; I think she looks smashing in pink!

Oh! Oh! For those who live in places where it is perpetually summer, how do you celebrate Fall?? I miss the leaves changing colors...

Happy weekend!

TGIS

It's the weekend. And what a looooovely weekend it's been too.

• My sister Katie is home from Africa today! She's also the birthday girl today. Wish her a good one.
• Carrots for Michaelmas blogger Haley's husband Daniel wrote an awesome response about kids bringing the party to church.
• Rod Dreher asked his readers to recommend 3 books about one religion, and list in order of preference. Here is Leah's response (and more background) and now, here are mine:
• An Affair to Remember by Graham Greene (fiction)
• The Imitation of Christ by St. Thomas a Kempis
• Introduction to Christianity by Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI (as Joseph Ratzinger)
• Comedian vs. Smart Phone - the saga continues at TIC. 
• How do you like my new blog look? Because I am actually very happy with it... and I did it! (With a friendly thanks to my friend Kate for helping me with re-sizing the header picture.)
• Talk to me about meat for dinner. What kind of meat dishes do you like? How do you decide? Do you think it's worth buying meat at Whole Foods/Fresh Market vs. "regular" grocery stores? How much of your budget (% or $$) do you allot for meat?

Love so great for a person so small...

And now, an excerpt of a reflection by Pope Francis (as Jorge Bergoglio) on the lepers' encounter with Jesus (today's Gospel is Luke 17:11-19); as found in October's Magnificat (emphasis mine):

Everything in our life, today just as in Jesus' time, begins with an encounter. ... 

We cannot understand this dynamic of encounter which brings forth wonder and adherence if it has not been triggered...by mercy. Only someone who has encountered mercy, who has been caressed by the tenderness of mercy, is happy and comfortable with the Lord. ... 

In front of this merciful embrace...we feel real desire to respond, to change, to correspond; a new morality arises. ...Christian morality is simply a response. It is the heartfelt response to a surprising, unforeseeable, "unjust" mercy... The surprising, unforeseeable "unjust" mercy...of one who knows me, knows my betrayals and loves me just the same, appreciates me, embraces me, calls me again, hopes in me, and expects from me. This is why the Christian conception of morality is a revolution; it is not a never falling down but an always getting up again. ... 

Jesus is encountered, just as two thousand years ago, in a human presence, the Church, the company of those whom he assimilates to himself, his Body, the sign and sacrament of his Presence. ...It is a question of starting to say "You" to Christ, and saying it often. It is impossible to desire it without asking for it. And if someone asks for it, it is because in the depths of his being he feels attracted, called, looked at, awaited...There from the depths of my being, something attracts me toward Someone who looked for me first, is waiting for me first.

I hope you all are enjoying a blessed weekend!

#7QT: Life, Listlessness, and The Ladies Who Lunch

Hey-o, gang! Check in with Jen and the crew here!

ONE

Officially 11 days till my due date... the bets are rolling in steadily. My brother John lost first; he said September 11. My MIL bet I will go into labor tonight and deliver tomorrow... fingers crossed that doesn't happen either.

Any bets, readers? We're asking for date, time and gender! And thank you all so very much for the sweet prayers, notes and comments y'all have sent my way during these past nine months. I couldn't have made it through the nausea without my vast support system!

TWO

I love Pintrest, but do you know what would make it even better? REVIEWS.

Here's one Amazon reviewer who had me laughing out loud over his reviews of hummingbird nector, milk, toilet seats, et cetera. (H/T to this lady for pointing me there.)

But seriously. We need a Pintrest reviews board! This Epic Pintrest Fail website will suffice for now.

(Pinning? Follow me! I loves it.)

THREE

“Brother, I’m not depressed and haven’t lost spirit. Life everywhere is life, life is in ourselves and not in the external. There will be people near me, and to be a human being among human beings, and remain one forever, no matter what misfortunes befall, not to become depressed, and not to falter – this is what life is, herein lies its task.” 

― Fyodor Dostoyevsky, 'The Brothers Karamazov'

FOUR

I plan to tackle tasks this week with muffins, specifically blueberry, which I will be making without a box of mix and a can of blueberries for the first time EVER. I hope they'll be delicious. I've stalked Pintrest for delicious blueberry muffin recipes, but I think I am going to stick with my cookbooks for now... too many healthy recipes and substitutions abound. People! Some people just want their muffins to resemble a dessert!

This recipe understands me. Then again, these zucchini blueberry muffins do look enticing.

FIVE

I'm also exhausted. I have not posted on the blog since last Saturday, but I've started four pieces... I just can't finish them. Listless is the word I've been searching for when people ask how I am doing - "characterized by lack of interest, energy, or spirit" and "lacking energy or disinclined to exert effort; lethargic"... dot dot dot.

Next week I'll be 39 weeks. I'm having contractions but ... yeah, no. Yesterday at the gym/ Tulane rec center, Friends was on t.v. in the elliptical area and Rachel was rushed to the hospital by Joey because she was experiencing contractions. The doctor told her not to worry, they were only Braxton-Hicks, a.k.a. practice contractions.

Which made me preggo-rant/ think while sweating/ labor training, Had her doctor SERIOUSLY never talked to her about Braxton-Hicks?! What kind of doctor does she have? And why did she go to the E.R.? And why did the doctor tell Joey he did the right thing by bringing her in?!

Sure, they hurt. Fine. But the E.R.? C'mon Friends writers. No-no-no-no drama!

SIX

Prayer request: one of my in-laws' chickens might be biting the dust soon. My MIL is very sad about it, even though she will soon have a grandchild. (Will thinks this is a good trade-off!)

I call them "The Ladies Who Lunch"

Also, my husband and our friend Katie start the Match process on Sunday. It's a stressful time, but I pray it will be a fruitful time as well. Three months of interviewing, followed by two and a half months of waiting, and a grand reveal in mid-March after the giant algorithm computes where the aspiring doctors are to spend the next couple (or many, many more!) years of their life. All the prayers you can spare, please!

Prayers for Colorado, peace abroad, and an increase of charity too.

SEVEN

Have I shared this picture yet? Me at 38 weeks:

Happy times as Casa Baldwin. Happy Friday, all!

Creating Order, Or Working in Order?

Today at the Austrian Economics and Literature blog:

"However, writers are wrong to think this. First, language is not chaos. The language they use evolved in a spontaneous order. That language follows the rules of grammar and syntax -- a deep grammar which is instinctual and, thus, genetically inherited; an evolving surface grammar and syntax which evolves more quickly in the linguistic order."

--Troy Camplin, "Creating Order, Or Working in Order?" 

To See A World

I give my Thanksgiving reflections at The Imaginative Conservative.

And in the spirit of giving, I leave you with some James Joyce, excerpted from 'Portrait of a Young Man as an Artist':

—And thanks be to God, Johnny, said Mr Dedalus, that we lived so long and did so little harm.
—But did so much good, Simon, said the little old man gravely. Thanks be to God we lived so long and did so much good. 

Have a happy and blessed Thanksgiving, dear readers.

The night Dickens had a Marian vision

William Oddie writes in The Catholic Herald:

Though Dickens hated all displays of religious feeling, he had a distinct and sincerely held religion of his own, possibly influenced by the Unitarianism of his friend and biographer John Forster. In 1868 he gave a New Testament to a son setting out for Australia, “because it is the best book that ever was, or will be, known in the world”; and he wrote to him in order “most solemnly [to] impress upon [him] the truth and beauty of the Christian Religion, as it came from Christ Himself”. “Never,” he went on, “abandon the wholesome practice of saying your own private prayers, night and morning. I have never abandoned it myself, and I know the comfort of it.”

This was the Dickens who in 1844 underwent a religious experience (rarely written about), which he described vividly in a letter to Forster. “Let me tell you,” he wrote from Venice, “of a curious dream I had, last Monday night; and of the fragments of reality I can collect; which helped to make it up … In an indistinct place, which was quite sublime in its indistinctness, I was visited by a Spirit. I could not make out the face, nor do I recollect that I desired to do so. It wore a blue drapery, as the Madonna might in a picture by Raphael; and bore no resemblance to any one I have known except in stature … It was so full of compassion and sorrow for me… that it cut me to the heart; and I said, sobbing, ‘Oh! give me some token that you have really visited me!… Answer me one… question!’ I said, in an agony of entreaty lest it should leave me. ‘What is the True religion?’ As it paused a moment without replying, I said – Good God in such an agony of haste, lest it should go away! – ’You think, as I do, that the Form of religion does not so greatly matter, if we try to do good? or,’ I said, observing that it still hesitated, and was moved with the greatest compassion for me, ‘perhaps the Roman Catholic is the best? perhaps it makes one think of God oftener, and believe in him more steadily?’

“‘For you,’ said the Spirit, full of such heavenly tenderness for me, that I felt as if my heart would break; ‘for you it is the best!’ Then I awoke, with the tears running down my face, and myself in exactly the condition of the dream. It was just dawn.”

Was this a vision of the Blessed Virgin Mary, as many Catholics will naturally assume? During the course of the dream, Dickens made the assumption that he was speaking to his wife’s sister, Mary Hogarth, who had died in 1837, and whom he had dearly loved (though he also perceived that the spirit “bore no resemblance to any one I have known”). But he also explained the dream afterwards in explicitly Catholic terms, pointing out that there was “a great altar in our bed-room” where Mass had once regularly been said, and that he had been “listening to the convent bells (which ring at intervals in the night), and so had thought, no doubt, of Roman Catholic services”.

“Put the case,” he wrote to Forster, “of that wish” [the ambition he had expressed in an earlier letter, to leave in his writings his “hand upon the time … with one tender touch for the mass of toiling people that nothing could obliterate”] “being fulfilled by any agency in which I had no hand; and I wonder whether I should regard it as a dream, or an actual Vision!”

Read more here>>>>>>>

Leah: You Say That's Exactly How This Grace Thing Works

In honor of Leah Libresco of Unequally Yoked converting to Catholicism, here is a little Cormac McCarthy:

The old man swung his head back and forth. The way of the transgressor is hard. God made this world, but he didnt make it to suit everbody, did he?

I don't believe he much had me in mind.

Aye, said the old man. But where does a man come by his notions. What world's he seen that he liked better?

I can think of better places and better ways.

Can ye make it be?

No.

No. It's a mystery. A man's at odds to know his mind cause his mind is aught he has to know it with. He can know his heart, but he dont want to. Rightly so. Best not to look in there. It aint the heart of a creature that is bound in the way that God has set for it. You can find meanness in the least of creatures, but when God made man the devil was at his elbow. A creature that can do anything. Make a machine. And a machine to make the machine. And evil can run itself a thousand years, no need to tend it. You believe that?

I don't know.

Believe that.

--Cormac McCarthy, Blood Meridian

(I do so enjoy that passage. Hat tip to my Southern Lit. prof, Dr. Sommerville!)

Welcome home, Leah! You've been in my prayers for so long. God is so good!

Let us all pray for Leah, each other, and all those seeking Truth. Just as we'll never know what happened to Paul on the road to Damascus, we glean that each life has a its own path to God through Christ which shall never end in this world.

Oh, and here's a little Mumford and Sons, which is more than appropriate to blast for any occasion!

 

 Oh happy Monday!!!!!!!

Please Sir, I Want Some More!

"Let us be moral. Let us contemplate existence." -- Charles Dickens, who was born exactly 200 years ago at the stroke of midnight.

h/t Cincinnati Public Library tweet

My Name's MacWhat?

A MacBeth rap by the Cincinnati Shakespeare Company



Also, some perspective on this Anonymous nonsense:

"Anonymous should be ignored by all Shakespeare lovers" by Francis Phillips at the Catholic Herald

"Shakespeare authorship fantasists don't understand how plays actually get written" by Allan Massie at The Telegraph

And still more, from P.G. Wodehouse's Episode of the Dog McIntosh:

Wooster: "What did he say?"

Jeeves: "I cannot recall his exact words, sir, but he drew a comparison between your mentality and that of a cuckoo."

Wooster: "A cuckoo, eh?"

Jeeves: "Yes, sir. To the bird's advantage."

Cootie Shots and Conundrums

TBM Topic 17: Emotional Chastity

"Cootie Shots and Conundrums" by Julie Robison
"Daydream Believers and Emotional Disasters" by Trista at Not a Minx, Moron, or a Parasite
"Easy Bake Love Story" by Elizabeth at Startling the Day

We three are from the oft-mentioned, widely-speculated upon demographic of young, twenty-something Catholic women. We're here to dispel the myths and misconceptions- please join us for the discussion on Facebook and Twitter!

In the second grade, I received a cootie shot/ anti-boy inoculation from a retractable lead pencil. Don't worry, it was given to me by a professional- my seatmate had given them to nearly every other girl in the class too. From then on, I was (mostly) immune to male charms. I was one of the few girls still playing soccer with the boys in junior high. I focused on making good friends, both male and female, in high school. I was realistic about dating in college, following the sage wisdom of my parents: A date isn't a proposal. A dance isn't a commitment. Enjoying another person's company doesn't mean you're meant to be together forever.

Emotional chastity is about protecting your heart. It does not mean being unwilling to give it, but rather, give it selflessly, without regard to return. A perfect example of this is Elinor from Sense and Sensibility. She really liked Edward, but when she found out he was secretly engaged to another woman, she protected her feelings and let life play itself out. On the opposite side, her sister Marianne committed crimes of emotional exhibitionism. Fortunately, for us readers as well as both Dashwood sisters, true love wins out in the end.

I'll give a more probably example: menfolk as friends. I've never believed the old adage of "men and women can't be friends." I think such generalities are poppycock. Friendship, like love, is a choice and an action. Attraction, on the other hand, is not.

On of the biggest conundrums women face today is the acceptability of "friends with benefits." Girl meets guy. They become friends. They're not interested in each other, so they only pursue friendship. Then, something changes. They start to feel attracted towards each other. What then?

One of possibility is to pursue a relationship.

Another possibility is to have a mature conversation and decide friendship is the best course of action.

Then, there is technically a third option. Really, a fraction of a choice, an algebraic mixture of the above: the friendship as the core, plus the heart-break, minus the commitment, and plenty of unknown variables. Friends with benefits is possibly one of the worst violations of emotional chastity. The benefits are purely physical. It is a utilitarian friendship where two people seek something from the other person. Neither party will grow as a human being because humanity needs virtue and goodness, not consensual vices or an emulation of shallowness, to flourish.

Here are two recent Hollywood examples:

Exhibit A, "Friends with Benefits" (2011)



Exhibit B, "No Strings Attached" (2011)



I would like to point out that both movies involve the complication of falling in genuine love with the other person. Do you think anyone would want to watch the movie if the people only submitted to their animalistic natures, opposed to rising above the banal situation towards the true, goodness and beauty of Love?

What a conundrum the modern world is in! Even if one does not participate in the friends-with-benefits arena, watching these type of movies, reading chick lit and endlessly daydreaming about a future with someone you have not had that type of conversation with is hazardous to feminine mental health. The unrealistic expectations set up by thinking about handsome men and allowing one's mind to wander into fictional romance does not allow the heart to grow towards genuine love, which comes with time, honesty, purpose and virtue.

Self-control, therefore, is what is most needed in emotional chastity. It means not dwelling on the good times. It means not over-analyzing every word a cute guy said to you. It means not planning out one's future with the man you've started dating or just met. It is not easy, and requires constant vigilance. This does not mean one cannot enjoy romance, consider the future or giggle over cuteness. But people want mature love, which can only be achieved through pure intentions and not rushing into emotional bonds.

The best advice I've been given on the subject came from my bestie Julia, before I started dating B. It also happens to be the advice I gave her before she started dating her now-husband. To achieve happiness in life, you have to be content with yourself. More importantly, though, you have to be content with your situation.

If you are single and praying every night for love to find you, I suggest praying instead for God to give you purpose in your singleness. This, like most things, may only be a season, and use it as a way to serve God more fully. If you feel called towards the vocation of marriage, God will provide.

If you're still feeling like you're in a pickle, I suggest an old-school cootie shot. All you need is a #2 retractable pencil and a second grader to administer a dose of perspective!

Summer Readin', Having A Blast!

TBM Topic 14: Summer Reading

"Summer Readin', Having A Blast!" by Julie Robison
"Bright Maidens: Summer Reading" by Trista at Not a Minx, Moron, or a Parasite
"In Which I Pretend Perfect Weather Exists" by Elizabeth at Startling the Day

We three are from the oft-mentioned, widely-speculated upon demographic of young, twenty-something Catholic women. We're here to dispel the myths and misconceptions- please join us for the discussion!

I wish I could tell you more about my summer nights than the sad fact that I got home from work around 9:30 p.m. last night and was so tired/ too frazzled to write (I write for work; too much typing and thinking yesterday). Alas, my summer days are driftin' away and oh! Oh, those summer nights... reading late before bed. I recorded a video of me briefly discussing the six books I am into right now. I'm technically juggling more than six books right now, but such are the reading habits of a chronic multi-tasker!



Julie's book list
Second Friends: C.S. Lewis and Ronald Knox in Conversation by Milton Walsh
Thy Will Be Done by St. Francis de Sales
Departed Angels: The Lost Paintings -by Jack Kerouac, text by Ed Adler
Surprised by Canon Law by Pete Vere & Michael Trueman
Without Roots: The West, Relativism, Christianity, Islam by Cardinal Ratzinger/ Pope Benedict XVI and Marcello Pera
The Two Towers by J.R.R. Tolkien
The End of the Affair by Graham Greene

What are you reading right now? Tell me more, tell me more!

Bonus: Fr. Schall on why it's better to read a few authors than to stray through many.

Ain’t Tat Something

TBM Topic 12: Tattoos

"Ain't Tat Something" by Julie Robison
"In Memory Of" by Trista at Not a Minx, Moron, or a Parasite
"Needle and the damage done" by Elizabeth at Startling the Day

We three are from the oft-mentioned, widely-speculated upon demographic of young, twenty-something Catholic women. We're here to dispel the myths and misconceptions- please join us for the discussion!

Last Tuesday, I drove my brother north to his interview with the Navy. I was struck by the number of times the Lieutenant asked him if he had any tattoos. I found out later that the Navy allows tattoos if they are covered by conventional clothing (i.e. chest, back), but not otherwise. I am not sure why this is, but it made me think of Flannery O’Connor’s short story “Parker’s Back.”

O.E. Parker, the protagonist, had been in the Navy. Nearly his entire body is covered with tattoos, with the notable exception of his back. Parker was “as ordinary as a loaf of bread” and began getting tattoos put on his body after he saw a man at a fair who was tattooed from head to foot. “Until he saw this man at the fair,” wrote O’Connor, “it did not enter his head that there was anything out of the ordinary about the fact that he existed.”

Parker later falls in love with Sarah Ruth, who was “forever sniffing up sin.” She was the daughter of a “Straight Gospel preacher,” and was the first woman he met who did not approve of his tattoos, calling them “a heap of vanity.” He is not religious or interested in it, but still wants to make an effort to please his wife, who constantly threatens his lax language with references to Judgment Day.

The Christ

And so, Parker decides to get a tattoo of the Byzantine Christ on his back for her. It takes the artist two days and Parker pays $20. The tattooist (and later, men at the pool hall) asks if Parker has gone and “got religion” and if he is “ saved” now. “Naw,” Parker replied; “I ain’t got no use for none of that. A man can’t save his self from whatever it is he don’t deserve any of my sympathy. …I married a woman that’s saved, ” is his defense. Parker believes she’ll like it because “She can’t help herself… She can’t say she don’t like the looks of God.”

Sarah Ruth, in  fact, doesn’t like it. She takes a broom and whacks him on the back again and again, screaming “idolatry!” at her husband; “I can put up with lies and vanity but I don’t want no idolater in this house!” When she sees the face of the Christ, she says she doesn't know him. When Parker says it's God, she asserts that God "don't look. He's a spirit. No man shall see his face."

I love this short story. Mainly for its mockery of the assertion that God is merely a spirit, which is practically a denial that Jesus is the Word made flesh and lived on this earth, but also for its social commentary. Parker's mother, for instance, "wept over what was becoming of him" after he got his first tattoo (and then began to drink beer and get in fights). She will not pay for his tattoos (except for the one with her name on it) and attempts to drag her son to a revival, before he runs away from home and joins the Navy. His wife barely tolerates the tattoos, and prefers him his sleeves rolled down and fully covered. Before her, he found that women were attracted to his tattoos and men liked to gawk at his new tattoos. He never felt satisfied for long, and always yearned for another tattoo, filling the space, searching for his next one. It's a beautiful and physical image of a man looking for personal fulfillment.

I do not think tattoos are an issue of morals or faith. The argument that one should respect one's body can easily be countered by examples of people who disrespect their body by overeating and/ or drinking, indulging in sexual appetites, and violence. In terms of my Catholicism and tattoos, there is nothing in my beliefs which sway me here or there on tattoos.

There is no right or wrong answer on tattoos. My own opinion, of course, generally thumbs its nose down at tattoos. There are, of course, exceptions and double-standards. I don't mind them on males nearly as much as I despise them on girls. There are also industries where outside appearance matters-- in banking, law, and medicine, for instance-- visibly noticeable tattoos would not be tolerated.

For me, the bigger question is why: Why are you getting that tattoo? Why are you putting it there? Why are you inking something permanently to your largest organ?

a depiction of Parker's back

Apparently tats are big chick and/ or hipster magnets. I'm sorry, I meant "tattoos." I was trying to sound hip, which I am not. In all seriousness, tattoos do hold a fascination for many people. I cannot suppose why, but O'Connor gave me an inkling into such a sentiment.

Near the end of "Parker's Back," O'Connor wrote, "Parker sat for a long time on the ground in the alley behind the pool hall, examining his soul. He saw it as a spider web of facts and lies that was not at all important to him but which appeared to be necessary in spite of his opinion. The eyes that were not forever on his back [of Jesus Chris] were eyes to be obeyed. He was as certain of it as he had ever been of anything."

In the end, in the Resurrection of the body, God-in-Three will not be concerned with the marks on our body, but the state of our souls, our pursuit of truth and our love of God and each other. A tattoo is not going to disrupt our journey towards God, and it should not be a distraction to believers or non-believers alike. One day, when we see the face of God, that will be something to stare at; but for now, tat's tat!

Do you have a Twitter? Follow us! @BrightMaidens

In addendum: If you want to know why this post is late, read here. If you want to read Will's guest post, click here.

What Are You Reading?

I'm back, after a loooong time. Can't promise consistency, but at least content. Volume 21, baby!

one

This week, I bought more books than my New Years' Resolutions allowed*. I said 3? Well, I meant 8! It's summer, does that count for anything?

I also renewed two subscriptions (First Things and The New Criterion) and took out a third (Touchstone, because its price was blessedly and severely reduced). I sadly am letting one of my newspapers go, though, and am happy to still have my Wall Street Journal, National Catholic Register, Financial Times, and The Magnificat.

Have you bought any good reads lately? Are you supporting excellent writing and the advancement of intellect?

two

Elizabeth is always marveled by how much I read. I thought I'd share the five books I am currently reading (yes, at the same time; I like multitasking):

I got this one for Christmas and am loving it:

Edith Stein and Companions On The Way to Auschwitz by Father Paul Hamans

This thick one will be finished before the summer is out - fantastic and meticulously written and researched:

From Dawn to Decadence: 500 Years of Western Cultural Life by Jacques Barzun

This one is really interesting and insightful:

Philosophy 101 By Socrates by Peter Kreeft

B. lent me this one, and it is hil-arious:

A Practical Guide to Racism by C. H. Dalton

I am listening to this one in the car, and it is, of course, just wonderful:

The Fellowship of the Ring by J.R.R. Tolkien

In July, I'm going to start Brighton Rock by Graham Greene for my long-distance book club with Tessa and Brenna! Excited to read more Graham Greene - I love The Heart of the Matter and The Power and the Glory. Highly recommend both as well, if people are looking for summer reading recommendations.

Up next: Christopher Dawson, Zora Neale Hurston, Pope Benedict XVI and some Sir Arthur Conan Doyle.

three

Here is my blog referral of the week: Born After Reagan

My friend Logan started it a few months ago, and now I am excited for the 2012 election just so I can read what he has to say about it!

Why yes, we did meet Ron Paul together three years ago:

CPAC 2008

four

The topic for next week's Bright Maidens' post is picked! Next Tuesday, please join us in discussing "Catholic Modesty."

If you're a first time participator, all you have to do is write on the same subject and post your response to the topic on our FB wall. Wa-la! If you're not on FB but still want to participate, e-mail it and we will post it for you to share with the group. If you're on Twitter, our hashtag is #brightmaidens (with an 's' on the end!) to share posts and tweets.

Also, Bright Maidens refers to we three girls, but we have both males and females participating. The male hashtag on Twitter is #cathdudes if you want to read some some cool Catholic dudes.

A re-cap of last week's topic, a response to Max Lindenman's article on "Dating Nice Catholic Girls":
Elizabeth: On Reading Confused Catholic Writers
Trista: Please Don't Call Me A Prude
Julie: Help! Help! I'm Being Repressed!

Elizabeth makes a list of all the contributions too, so please check our FB page later for that!

five

I've been home for a week, and am still actively learning to adjust to a new sleep schedule, being back at work, and hearing people talk to me in English. As happy as I am to be home, South Korea was an amazing experience. I'll give you a sneak peek from my weekend in Busan:

This is a kimbab, and the best thing I ate in South Korea (stay tuned!)

Best bathroom sign EVER.

The Eastern Sea, a.k.a. The Sea of Japan. But they don't like the Japanese, so don't call it that, please.

The Busan fish market. I'm going to have a whole post on food.

six

I'm also going to have a whole post on drinking in South Korea. Here's me trying authentic Korean beer for the first time:

So innocent.

There are so many patron saints of beer; they obviously did not invoke any of them!

seven

I bought Adele's latest album, 21. I seriously do not know why I waited so long. It is wonderful, soul-filled and beautiful.

Here's "Someone Like You" with Adele talking about why she wrote the song. Warning: I teared up a bit.



She's a two months younger than me, too. Gives a girl perspective!

Okay, one more, this one upbeat: "Set Fire To The Rain"



SHE IS SO AMAZING. Buy her music. Make her famous and wealthy, she deserves it. I want her singing forever and ever.

Happy Friday, friends! See Conversion Diary for more. Also, say a prayer for Jen! She's having her baby on Wednesday!!

*I've been miserably failing to follow most of my New Years' resolutions, actually, which is why I take the book buying limit one so seriously!

The Alpha and the Omega

Emeth, the Calormene, describing his encounter with Aslan:


"The creatures came rushing on, their eyes brighter and brighter as they drew nearer and nearer to the standing Stars. But as they came right up to Aslan one or the other of two things happened to each of them. They all looked straight in his face, I don't think they had any choice about that. 


And when some looked, the expression of their faces changed terribly -- it was fear and hatred: except that, on the faces of Talking Beasts, the fear and hatred lasted only for a fraction of a second. You could see that they suddenly ceased to be Talking Beasts. They were just ordinary animals. And all the creatures who looked at Aslan in that way swerved to their right, his left, and disappeared into his huge black shadow which (as you have heard) streamed away to the left of the doorway. The children never saw them again. I don't know what became of them. 

But the other looked in the face of Aslan and loved him, though some of them were very frightened at the same time. And all these came in at the Door, in on Aslan's right. There were some queer specimens among them. Eustace even recognized one of those very Dwarfs who had helped to shoot the Horses. But he had not time to wonder about that sort of thing (and anyway it was no business of his) for a great joy put everything else out of his head.


Then I fell at his feet and thought, Surely this is the hour of death, for the Lion (who is worthy of all honour) will know that I have served Tash all my days and not him. Nevertheless, it is better to see the Lion and die than to be Tisroc of the world and live and not to have seen him. But the Glorious One bent down his golden head and touched my forehead with his tongue and said, 'Son, thou art welcome.' 


But I said, 'Alas, Lord, I am no son of thine but the servant of Tash.' 


He answered, 'Child, all the service thou hast done to Tash, I account as service done to me.' 


Then by reason of my great desire for wisdom and understanding, I overcame my fear and questioned the Glorious One and said, 'Lord, is it then true, as the Ape said, that thou and Tash are one?' The Lion growled so that the earth shook (but his wrath was not against me) and said, 'It is false. Not because he and I are one, but because we are opposites -- I take to me the services which thou hast done to him. For I and he are of such different kinds that no service which is vile can be done to me, and none which is not vile can be done to him. 


Therefore, if any man swear by Tash and keep his oath for the oath's sake, it is by me that he has truly sworn, though he know it not, and it is I who reward him. And if any man do a cruelty in my name, then, though he says the name Aslan, it is Tash whom he serves and by Tash his deed is accepted. Dost thou understand, Child?' 


I said, 'Lord, thou knowest how much I understand.' But I said also (for truth constrained me), 'Yet I have been seeking Tash all my days.' 


'Beloved,' said the Glorious One, 'unless thy desire had been for me thou wouldst not have sought so long and so truly. For all find what they truly seek.'"

--from The Last Battle by C.S. Lewis