I am on my way

Lord have mercy on my rough and rowdy ways 
Lord have mercy on my rough and rowdy ways
--"Down in the Valley", The Head and the Heart

"Ithaka" by C.P. Cavafy
Translated by Edmund Keeley and Philip Sherrard 

As you set out for Ithaka
hope the voyage is a long one,
full of adventure, full of discovery.
Laistrygonians and Cyclops,
angry Poseidon—don’t be afraid of them:
you’ll never find things like that on your way
as long as you keep your thoughts raised high,
as long as a rare excitement
stirs your spirit and your body.
Laistrygonians and Cyclops,
wild Poseidon—you won’t encounter them
unless you bring them along inside your soul,
unless your soul sets them up in front of you.

Hope the voyage is a long one.
May there be many a summer morning when,
with what pleasure, what joy,
you come into harbors seen for the first time;
may you stop at Phoenician trading stations
to buy fine things,
mother of pearl and coral, amber and ebony,
sensual perfume of every kind—
as many sensual perfumes as you can;
and may you visit many Egyptian cities
to gather stores of knowledge from their scholars.

Keep Ithaka always in your mind.
Arriving there is what you are destined for.
But do not hurry the journey at all.
Better if it lasts for years,
so you are old by the time you reach the island,
wealthy with all you have gained on the way,
not expecting Ithaka to make you rich.

Ithaka gave you the marvelous journey.
Without her you would not have set out.
She has nothing left to give you now.

And if you find her poor, Ithaka won’t have fooled you.
Wise as you will have become, so full of experience,
you will have understood by then what these Ithakas mean.

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What My Kids Listen To: Blood on the Tracks

In the Baldwin household, my kids definitely listen to Sesame Street and Disney on Pandora. They've also got two parents with a very wide range of musical interests, too. I'm going to start sharing the kind of musical ballads I want my kids to grow up with -- very different from what I grew up listening to as well, which was mainly Rogers and Hammerstein musicals, Raffi, classical music, Motown and Evangelical Christian bands/ singers.

**

Blood on the Tracks is my favorite Bob Dylan album.

"Tangled Up in Blue" - this is a wonderful song.

Then she opened up a book of poems
And handed it to me
Written by an Italian poet
From the thirteenth century
And everyone of them words rang true
And glowed like burnin' coal
Pourin' off of every page
Like it was written in my soul
From me to you
Tangled up in blue

Listen here for an amazing live version from 1975; Bob looks a little native in this version. A few years ago, my sister Marianne was listening to this track when she asked me, "What was he doing in a topless bar in the first place?" Topless bars, Italian poetry, New Orleans, revolution and lumber jacks ... what else does this song need?

"Lily, Rosemary and the Jack of Hearts" - here's to walking up to a stranger and grinning. I love this ballad of greed, conquest and revenge.

"Shelter from the Storm" is my favorite Dylan song, period, and its location near the end of the album is the perfect poetry.

I need to mention that the songs are best listened to in order on the album. It's easy to pick out one's favorites; but to really feel the emotional powerhouse this album is, it must be a continuous flow. This is Dylan's magic - the sublimity of story, the allusions of pain, hope and the path of someone else's journey.

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Know Thyself, Own Thyself

Driving back from the Philadelphia airport, Walk the Moon's song "Shut Up + Dance" came on the radio, which resulted in me grooving in the passenger's seat. I can't help it: I feel music. I love dancing and am convinced I should have trained as a dancer.

Even in the dark, Will is smirking at me.

"What?!?" I demanded, my head still bobbing.

"Every girl I know loves this song." (And by girl, he means any female at the hospital - they listen to music during shifts.)

I give him side eye. It's the Zora Neale Hurston effect, when Zora is at a Blues venue with a friend:

"Good music they have here," he remarks, drumming the table with his fingertips. 

Music. The great blobs of purple and red emotion have not touched him. He has only heard what I felt. He is far away and I see him but dimly across the ocean and the continent that have fallen between us. 

Will laughs at me as I argue that this song is a modern ballad set to indie electronic - the story of seeing into the future, desire and action. Plus, it has amazing beat. (Walk the Moon is a great band from Cincinnati, Ohio!)

"I never said it wasn't a great song. Just own it! Own that you like this song. Who cares that other girls like it."

Own it. Yes. Too often, we add qualifiers or apologize for having interests. Am I alone in this? Why do we always try to deflect even minor criticism?
"Oh, I like that because I am a ____."
"Yeah, I'm such a dork because I like ____."

No one needs peer review to decide what to like. No one needs qualifications for having hobbies. We're allowed to change our mind. We don't need someone else's permission to have a dance party. We shouldn't paint our life neutral colors.

I changed my favorite color the other day. I went to a running store, bought new running shoes and am teaching myself how to run with a honking double jogger stroller. I've been thinking how much I used to love drawing with oil pastels, and when I FINALLY clean my office this summer, I'm buying myself a new set.

Sometimes, we all need to stop overthinking what things mean - ooo-hooo, shut up and dance with me!

Own it! Whatever "it" is. Great things can happen.

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Grading Tunes

End of first semester means a lot of grading... and with February approaching (a.k.a. the month of my Mardi Gras/ Lenten bebe), I am trying to do ALL the prep! This is also Will's last week in the intensive care unit {until March, eye roll} so HALLELUJAH! Let's dance!

Here's what I'm listening to:

{for my students and my comments on their papers, esp. re: their thesis statements}

"You Don't Have To Believe Me" - Eric Hutchinson

{so much snow in PA}

"The Sound of Sunshine" - Michael Franti & Spearhead

{always a favorite}

"Roll Away Your Stone" - Mumford & Sons

{a fun poke at politics}

"Big Parade" - The Lumineers

{classic}

"The Shape I'm In" - The Band

{I introduced Johnny Cash to Grace and she loves him; pats her leg and keeps beat}

"God's Gonna Cut You Down" - Johnny Cash

Ahh! This is fun... too fun - back to grading...

{and one more...}

 "All Over Now" - Eric Hutchinson

Happy Sunday, all!

The Thing About Residency

Last night, Will and I put Grace to bed and had our first moments of alone time... barely, before Will had to leave to go to work until 7 a.m. I became a barnacle while he talked to me, and before I went downstairs to fix his dinner and coffee, I begged him not to go.

"Okay, I'll just quit my job," he said, hugging me.

"Wait," I replied, turning my head out of his chest. "I can't support you and your extravagant lifestyle. I'll fix your sandwich."

My card sharks

It's the joke that always gets a smile - quitting residency, even though it's what we've talked about since our dating days. The promise of residency started this marriage during medical school. Two graduations later, here we are: and I am ready to be done. Yes I, who only venture into the hospital to provide Dr. Husband with sustenance during long shifts, accompany him while he returns a library book, or wait for him in the lobby to meet us post-shift (if someone - could be Grace, could be me - is feeling the cabin fever), am tired of residency.

Five months in, and it's really not so bad. Will's rotations haven't been the worst, just different. Okay, some of them are the worst. I'm not a fan of these overnights, but this week, he only has three in a row plus a 4 pm to 2 am shift. I think logging is the real time snatcher - hours spent with patient files, detailed and signed. Oh, and having to go from an overnight shift to grand rounds, like husband will do tomorrow.

It always seems like the better thing to do - quitting. I get tired of therapy, tired of teaching classes, tired of Grace's teething interrupting her nap schedule... and then wondering how I'm going to handle the second sweet thing in a few months. Ug, where is my desert island with a Wegmans and an internet connection? When can I nap without a baby monitor?

Then Will tells me about his patients. He tells me the funny stories and the sad stories. He tells me of cases he's proud of, and what he needs to work on.

I tell him about my day - what Grace is eating, how well she's self-feeding (and what she's throwing off her tray today), how therapy went that day (and other general activities we've done together), what I taught during class, how my work load is treating me, and anything I've read that day or thoughts I toss around for discussion.

Using a spoon is so two minutes ago...

Some days, we see each other for a few hours. Other days, the whole day. Today was less time than usual, but more than yesterday. I like doing simple chores with him - cleaning the kitchen, tidying up, feeding Grace dinner, playing with Grace and reading to Grace. After a day of "go-go-go", even being together feels relaxing.

Then he's back at work, and I'm at home, half-working on a powerpoint for my younger kids, and half-blogging. And I realize how lucky we are to be on this journey together. A classmate of Will's has been sick for the past few months, working himself to the bare minimum. I made extra soup, loaded up some favorite sick foods and drinks, and texted him stop over on his way home (we live by the hospital). He kept saying we were being too nice, but why pursue medicine if not to help heal the body--and soul too? To add a quality to another's life?

The thing about residency is that it is hard - yes. This is the last stage of training for doctors. Will calls this the "hand-holding" stage. In medical school, you mostly observed and sometimes got to sew someone up. In residency, you're officially an M.D. with a prescription pad and both you and the patient have the deer in headlights look: What's wrong? No, I'm asking you. Oh, you're asking me?

The other thing about residency is that it is worth it: the kind of satisfaction Will gets from helping his patients is obvious by how hard he studies those ridiculously thick books with little lettering. He's reading his ICU book this month for next month's rotation. He wants to be able - more than capable, more than confident - and the more I think about it, that's what a lot of us strive for, if we choose the challenge.

The ability to be, and do. I love teaching my students. I love talking about history and doing Socratic method discussion. It's not enough to memorize - context is king, understanding is relevant. The same goes for being a mom: do I wish Grace would stop pulling my hair and trying to swipe my glasses? Absolutely. But I can never wish her other than what she is, because taking care of my baby - especially through the harder days - is what gives me deeper purpose. It reminds me that I am here to serve. We are all here to serve

At a dear friend's wedding a few months ago, the song after communion was "The Servant Song"; it was breathtaking way to begin their marriage:

"Will you let me be your servant? Let me as Christ to you? Pray that I may have the grace to let you be my servant too."

As Will and I approach our second anniversary, we feel our marriage is stronger. We have always loved each other, and in two years, that love has manifested in many different acts: the way he takes care of me when I am preggo-nauseous, the way I make sure he eats, our mutual love of playing with Grace, and the way we rely on each other so completely. Will has a complete servant heart, whether he is with a friend, with family, or at work with a colleague or patient. He is a doer - he leads by doing. He blesses me daily with his goodness, love and support, and I have learned to let him take care of me too.

This servant's heart of his is why I try not to bemoan his shift work, or electives. He is learning to better serve the people of our community, and future communities. Many of Will's cases in the emergency room are not emergencies - but they are emotionally urgent for the families. The baby with a low-grade fever who wouldn't stop crying at 3 a.m. The 91 year old lady he spent four hours trying to resuscitate. The statutory rape victim who is 28 weeks pregnant (same as me). The woman who miscarried at 13 weeks. The traumas, the abdominal pains, the headaches.

"We are pilgrims on a journey, we are brothers on the road. We are here to help each other, walk the line and bear the load."

Residency feels hard for the spouse at home, watching the clock, bearing the load of laundry (my nemesis), unloading and re-loading the dishwasher, and forever tidying the same room over and over again, like Sisyphus pushing his rock up the mountain (only to have it roll back to the bottom!). It is essential that I recognize how good my work is too, though I don't need a specialized degree or license to act upon it. I can emotionally support him on the tough days, and provide a safe, loving home. And we hope, by example, that we will teach our children what it means to serve and love, and be able to graciously accept service and love in return.

The Wrote and The Writ

"The Wrote and The Writ" by Johnny Flynn

They're taking pictures of the man from God
I hope his cassock's clean
The burden of being our holy fellas
Your halo'd better gleam, better gleam

What of all those wayward priests?
The ones who like to drink
Do you suppose they'd swap their blood for wine
Like you swapped yours for ink, for ink

You wrote me, oh so many letters
And all of them seemed true
Promises look good on paper
Especially from you, from you

The weight of all those willing words
I carried all alone
You wouldn't put your pen to bed
When we hadn't found our own, our own

Your sentences rose high at night
And circled round my head
The circle's since been broken
Like the priest before me is breaking bread

I'm being asked to drink the blood of Christ
And soon I'll eat his flesh
I'm alone again before the altar
Shedding all my old regrets

The last of which I'll tell you now
As it flies down the sink
I never knew a part of you
You didn't set in ink, in ink

The letters that you left behind
No longer shall I read
Your blood's between the pages
And I can't stand to see you bleed

And I'll soon forget what was never there
Your words are ash and dust
All that's left is the song I've sung
The breath I've taken and the one I must

If you're born with a love for the wrote and the writ
People of letters your warning stands clear
Pay heed to your heart and not to your wit
Don't say in a letter what you can't in my ear



{{Music as poetry}}

Five Favorites (v. 6)

A few indulgences in my life lately:

{one}

The Frozen soundtrack

Okay, I've never seen the movie... but I want to; plus, my siblings share all these secret inner stories and loves and knowledge that only movie watchers understand. Brittany wrote a great piece on it for The Mirror Magazine, and I've spent most of today listening to the soundtrack on Spotify.

What's not to love? Sisters, heartache, humor, courage, love and Broadway star Idina Menzel (yes, from Wicked). Swoon, Disney.

I don't know what those little people are, but they're hilarious:

{two}

On that note... here is a hair tutorial for Elsa's braid. I'm always looking for ways not to wear my hair in a ponytail (little fingers hold tight):

{three}

King Cake. Apparently, not everyone celebrates happiness. I mean, Mardi Gras. My husband, for example, did not know what a king cake is before last night when I brought home a delicious one from Whole Foods. But honey, we live in New Orleans... indulge! Lent is in one week! The colors of purple, green and gold stand for justice, faith and power.

Look at dat baby!

Fun fact: down here, they fix more than cinnamon king cakes - praline, raspberry cream cheese, berry chantilly, and more!

{four}

Instagram. Total gramification. Totally in love. Follow me for giggles.

{five}

Today is five months since Grace was born. Love you, smiley baby!

Joining Hallie!

I Will Wait For You, Marcus Mumford - A Review of "Babel"

When I first read “Against Mumford” by Matthew Schmitz at First Thoughts, I wondered if we had listened to the same songs. Schmitz’s review of English folk-rock band Mumford and Sons’s second album “Babel” applauds the negativity of critics and belittles the praise of fans. His snarky critiques are unjust and lack an appreciation for the depth of their lyrical content and the wideness of their audience.

Mumford & Sons on their US Lake Tour

For the sake of clarity, I’ll state my position early on: I love Mumford and Sons’s music. I love their sound, I love their lyrics, and I love the way their music gets under my skin and into my soul. For people looking for real substance in music, this is an excellent band to listen to and truly enjoy. I also think conservatives have a lot to appreciate in Mumford’s art too, and I am intrigued by the men behind the mayhem.

I attended my first Mumford and Sons concert in August 2012, before the release of “Babel”; it was a sold-out event in which thousands of people stood on the lawn through three bands to hear the fourth play loudly into the night. There is no typical Mumford fan. I saw teenagers, twenty-somethings, parents with their kids, the hip, the prep, the jaded, and the older. People sang along, danced, hopped up and down, or swayed. For a concert, it certainly had an element of revival in it. There is something very beautiful about hearing thousands of people around you singing along to “It seems that all my bridges have been burnt/ But you say that’s exactly how this grace thing works/ It’s not the long walk home that will change this heart/ But the welcome I receive with the re-start” with their arms in the air and a smile on their face.

But the sheer beauty and power of these kinds of lyrics does not seem to phase or impress Schmitz. He says,

 ”But Mumford does not demand any public or existential commitment from its listeners. It is the typical suburban song-spinning of popular music, but unlike that popular music it affects to be about something more. Mumford seems to be incapable of writing serious songs and unwilling to write ones that eschew bombast. …Mumford and Sons is a kind of musical Pintrest. They “collect” without really linking together a variety of quaint, beautiful, and touching things.”

If by not writing serious songs, he must be referring to songs with lyrics like these: “In these bodies we will live,/ In these bodies we will die,/ Where you invest your love/ You invest your life/ …You were made to meet your maker.” I can understand where he is coming from, though. With other popular musical artists like the ever philosophical Taylor Swift, who straight-up tells her listeners without ‘eschewing bombast’ that “Oooh, we called it off again last night/ But oooh, this time, I’m telling you, I’m telling you,/ We are never, ever, ever getting back together” and Rihanna’s more poetical “You’re a shooting star I see/ A vision of ecstasy/ When you hold me, I’m alive/ We’re like diamonds in the sky.”

And what of demanding any public commitment from its listeners? Do we here at The Imaginative Conservative demand that all our readers be conservatives or have an imagination? Certainly not. And for that matter, what secular music group anywhere demands public commitment of some sort? It leaves one feeling nauseated that good music cannot be appreciated without a loyalty stamp of approval. Schmitz also needed to do his homework before this piece was published. He writes, “We don’t know if they’re Christian (or indeed if they have any existential commitment), or if they’re just aesthetic reactionaries of a limited type. Eclecticism precludes evangelism.”

This begins a tricky and touchy subject between band mates. In a June 2011 interview with the band, Josh Eells of Rolling Stones wrote

“Listening to Mumford & Sons’ songs, it’s hard not to detect a vaguely spiritual undercurrent. The lyrics – in addition to high-literary allusions to Shakespeare and Steinbeck (Mumford, after all, is a guy who reads 16th-century English historical fiction for fun) – are also full of references to faith, sin and atonement, not to mention explicit exhortations to “serve God” and profound queries like “Can you kneel before the King and say, ‘I’m clean, I’m clean’?” Coupled with the band’s harmonies and a propulsive beat, they can almost sound more like Christian praise songs than modern-rock hits.”

Two of the band mates, Marcus Mumford and Ben Lovett, keyboardist and accordion player in the band, who has been friends with Mumford since the third grade, had this to say to Rolling Stones:

According to Lovett, a committed nonbeliever, Mumford’s religion made things tricky. “It was always a bit of a stumbling block for our friendship,” he says. “I don’t know if Marcus would see it like that – we were still great friends who played music together. But whenever that stuff would come up . . .”

The band publicly says the band is not Christian as all band mates are not believers, or religious for that matter. 

In a September 2012 interview with NPR,

Mumford grew up a preacher’s kid, and so it’s natural to presume that the new album’s title, Babel, takes on a certain biblical relevance. But the idea is far wider. “There are matters of the heart and sort of spiritual considerations that most humans have — explorative, really,” Mumford says. “We’re inspired by such a range of things between the four of us — almost every genre of music has been embraced by one of us at some time, and just about anything can inspire a song.” Schmitz final attack was suggested a clever ploy:

“The whole problem is well represented by their name, “Mumford and Sons.” It suggests history, tradition, the passing down of something real–above all, the transmission of blood. But Marcus Mumford is not in a band with his sons; in fact, he has no sons at all.”

To that, I have to say “yet.” Marcus Mumford is barely older than me at age 25 and married his childhood sweetheart last year, actress Carey Mulligan. The two met through church and were pen pals as children, before re-connecting after both had established themselves in public careers.

But to continue to the album: it is magnificent. It is not, however, an album which can be picked apart. Listening to one or two songs may be please, but the music is best appreciated when listened to in order. The reason this music is beautiful is not just the instrumentals, or the voices – it is the words. The songs remind me of a prayer journal, which is the power behind Mumford’s publicity. They may deny and deny again, like Peter before the cock crows, but the spirituality in these songs touch people in a way Christian-specific art has not lately affected the culture.

On personal speculation, I think it is the band’s success is viscerally coming at odds with personal beliefs, which is causing the band to take a break for a while. How can you sing about being a “lover of the light” and say “‘Cause I know my weakness, know my voice,/ And I’ll believe in grace and choice/ And I know perhaps my heart is farce,/ But I’ll be born without a mask” and say that these words are just words?

Some people do not like the repetition of the lyrics; these, again, remind me of prayer. The way we repeat the words over and over again (in, say, the Jesus prayer) so as to make it less about the words we say to God and more about our deepest need for communion with God. Mumford tells us, “But I’ll still believe though there’s cracks you’ll see,/ When I’m on my knees I’ll still believe,/ And when I’ve hit the ground, neither lost nor found,/ If you’ll believe in me I’ll still believe.”

The songs cover marriage proposals, regret, death, faith, hope, love, the search for contentment and the roads we all travel on in this life. The lyrics do not shy away from the hardships of life – the way sin entices us, the way life hands us hardships, the hope that we cling to when there is seemingly no hope. In “Hopeless Wanderer” he sings, “I wrestled long with my youth/ We tried so hard to live in the truth/ But do not tell me all is fine/ When I lose my head, I lose my spine.” He goes on to sing how he “will learn to love the skies he is under.”

Photo by James Minchin III for Rolling Stones

There are bad words and divine inspiration; there is humility and a lot of mandolin playing. Mumford & Sons remind me of virtuous pagans who speak truth and see light, though they do not attribute it correctly. And though a few members of the band were raised Christians, I have high hopes and heavy prayers that they will return to the Church with a flourish. Their art is too important to be foolish writings. Their music touches souls and digs deep; it is not just the study of poetry and a wide range of literature. Human nature can not be known as much as it can be felt.

Mumford & Sons are musicians, not theologians, but this does not mean they cannot reach upwards in explaining the Word in action. Mumford sings, “Spare my sins for the ark/ I was too slow to depart/ I’m a cad but I’m not a fraud/ I’d set out to serve the Lord.”

The other members of the band especially deny religious significance, but one listen to this album speaks much louder. I will wait for your next album, Marcus Mumford!

“And I came home/ Like a stone/ And I fell heavy into your arms/ These days of darkness/ Which we’ve known/ Will blow away with this new sun/ And I’ll kneel down/ Wait for now/ And I’ll kneel down/ Know my ground/ And I will wait, I will wait for you.”

Originally posted at The Imaginative Conservative

#7QT: The Music In Our Heads

Join Jen and friends here!

ONE

When my baby sleeps, her arms go up and her hands flick, like she's conducting a great orchestra invisible to the rest of us. I'm currently playing Appalachian Journey for us to keep tempo while she naps/ stares off into space and I write. For the past few days, as we've been driving east, then north, then south, and then back home west, it was a lot of RUSH, classic radio hits, and, sometimes, her wails synchronizing with the car speeding along the highway. And after the wails come the coos, the mouth noises, and a mama singing the "Grace-Grace-GraceGrace" song.

I like to imagine Grace has classical music swirling around in her head, something dramatic and exciting and beautiful, but I imagine it's something more like this:



"Mama, Dada, boop-boop, shoo-wawa!"

TWO

Bright Maidens are at it again! Join us for our November prompt - "How To Cultivate A (Truly) Grateful Heart"!

Write up a piece on your blog and share it on our FB page; we'll share it at-large. At the end of the month, we'll put all the pieces into one post and share them again for all to enjoy!

We're officially over 700 likes by this past weekend - do you like us too?

THREE

Want to know what your body goes through when you've run a marathon? Wonder if you're up for it today? Here, wonder no more! Pretty sweet infographic, I must say. I'm not one of those people who wants to run a marathon (although rumor has it that child birth is like it, but longer), but I used to run for fun and sports, so the concept still intrigues me. 5ks sound fun to me! Do they have baby harnesses for runners or is that what strollers are for? (Says the lady who was just cleared for exercise.)

FOUR

"I Learned Everything I Needed to Know About Marriage From Pride and Prejudice", The Atlantic Monthly
"Men Without Hearts" The American Conservative
"An Interview with Simcha Fisher, Author of A Sinner's Guide to Natural Family Planning", Ignitum Today

FIVE

" 'Too many Christians... have a tendency to make an ideology, an abstraction, out of Christianity. And abstractions have no need of a mother.' Here again what is said of Mary applies to the Church. The motherhood of the Church no longer means anything to our systems - but we, in order to free ourselves from their abstraction, need to return to our mother." -Henri de Lubac, Motherhood of the Church

(H/T Christine! A very cool lady and one of my favorite blogs.)

SIX

Grace is modeling the newest gift - a bib (and onesie, which is currently too big) from my high school alma mater! It's currently almost as long as her, but it should last her for a long time!

Future Lion?

SEVEN

Sneak peek into life right now... off to eat lunch before going on a walk with Will!

Happy weekend!

Happy Halloween!

We dressed Grace up like a bowl of candy corn today! Around here, trick-or-treaters don't come... the little kids get dressed and go to Halloween parties! The big kids do too - my neighbors sound like they're having a party!

My MIL and SIL are down here visiting, and we'll be having our own party tonight. It's been really fun having the extra company and help. Food too! My SIL is cooking and the kitchen smells heavenly...

Will has an interview in Baton Rouge tomorrow, so he's off cavorting with other applicants, residents and attendings! He'll be home tomorrow in time for All Saints' Day mass; my FIL will be down here by then too! I'm starting to research how to better live liturgically - perhaps by celebrating our favorite saints? Then mass again on All Souls' Day for our dearly departed? I'll write more on this soon.

Family picture before Will left to drive to an interview (dinner)

Today is also my little brother John's big 16th birthday! He's unreachable for a birthday sing until Sunday - he hopped on a bus to Tennessee today for a big regatta in TN tomorrow! He'll be in four boat. My brother Michael's girlfriend Lilah will also be racing there tomorrow at the collegiate level - prayers for both of them and their teams to rock their races!!

Love my little family!

I hope y'all have a wonderfully spooky evening! Do the Monster Mash!

#7QT: Hey Jealousy

Apparently it is Friday... I am losing all track of the days. Thanks to Jen, Cari & co. for keeping "it" going! (psst, look at Cari's awesome post about her awesome book)

ONE

Okay, I am giving myself 15 minutes to write this post as Will paces back and forth with Miss Fussykins, a.k.a. Grace Harriet, the newest member of the Baldwin Bunch. (Birth story here for those late to the game!)

Yawn.

This morning, I woke up with the newest emotion to add to my "new mom emotion spectrum": jealousy. I was wildly jealous of how Grace just plopped to back to sleep after her morning feedings because "someone" kept me up till 2 a.m.

Instead of getting mad, I sang this song instead:



I saw them in concert a few years ago with my cousin Sarah... it was free, and awesome. Grace and I also jump in the car, but the cops don't chase us around. I also thought his song was "Hey Jessie" growing up, but we all know Rick Springfield already tapped that for a title.

TWO

If you want delicious reads to appear in your inbox each day, may I recommend subscribing to Prufrock: Books, Art, Ideas by Micah Mattix via The American Conservative? Just lovely. Subscribe here!

THREE

In college, my Latin professor loved telling us that at school, you could study, sleep or socialize - that is, pick two out of those three. I hated that advice, but maybe because my socialization usually fell through the cracks - clubs, newspaper writing, Kappa, eating, etc.

Now that I am an adult, I wonder: what are the three things one can do in a day, and then pick two of them? I've decided it's clean - write - take care of baby. (Coffee, eating and sleep are non-negotiable!)

What are your three?

FOUR

In honor of Blessed John Paul II's feast day on October 22:

FIVE

If someone told you they were considering converting to Catholicism and asked you to weigh in, what would you say? A friend asked me this week. Now, I've been blessed to have a couple friends convert and talk me through their thoughts, and pray with them, and pray for them. But every person is different, and so my answer is never quite the same... but it always comes back to the Eucharist for me. The whole of life stems from that, what it means, and our physical encounter with Christ.

Perhaps that is why my favorite part of mass is, "Lord, I am not worthy to have you come under my roof; but only say the word, and my soul shall be healed."

SIX

In a fit of exhaustion earlier this week, after finally settling Grace down for her nap, I threw myself on the bed and my glasses broke. Join me in mourning the loss of my dear friends.

I know Grace; I'm really sad too!

SEVEN

Annnnnnnd Grace is still sobbing. But here's a cute picture of her to go! My friend Kate got her a "Future Senator" hat.

Her dad doesn't want her to go into politics; I think she looks smashing in pink!

Oh! Oh! For those who live in places where it is perpetually summer, how do you celebrate Fall?? I miss the leaves changing colors...

Happy weekend!

#7QT: Kill with Kindness

Four days till my due date... and that's all the baby news I have. Holla back to Jen!

{one}

Pope Francis and his awesome interview - my thoughts here at Ignitum Today, "Whom Would Kindness Kill More: Them or You?" on the interview and the spiritual work of mercy of comforting the afflicted.

{two}

This week I made two larger meals out of the ground beef we bought. One was spaghetti and meatballs, the other was a casserole. Will does not like cooked vegetables, which is a good reminder to me to think more before I make a big meal of foods I like, because then I have to finish them. Since we don't eat meat on Fridays, this pushes leftovers back even further. Sadly, I am already over both these meals (and ground beef) and onto my next culinary adventure dreams...

Crock pot time!

Will requested a rump roast, and I found this recipe for Pioneer Woman’s Perfect Pot Roast; its only flaw is that it lacks potatoes, though, which we have an abundance of - it seems like I could add more vegetables too (for my own benefit).

Natalie of The Busy Budgeting Mama posted Round 3 of her freezer crock pot meals, and they look delicious. She also posted the recipes + grocery list, because she is an angel.

I also found this recipe for balsamic vinaigrette, Will's favorite dressing, so we can eat happy salad this week. BOOM. VEGETABLES.

Do y'all have any favorite crock pot or make ahead meals?

{three}

The Myers-Briggs test - have you ever had yourself personality tested? Will and I took it at our pre-cana retreat, and I'm glad I wrote it down for reference! I am an ISFJ (married to a ESTP! Which, I was thrilled to read later, is the natural pair to my personality - isn't that fascinating?).

I mention it because Jen asked in her 7QT, if our personality was a song, what would it be?

I've picked Natalie Merchant's "Wonder":



What is your personality type?! What is your song? (It's subjective - just pick one!)

{four}

The coolest part of reading my personality "portrait" were my different career starting points:

ISFJs have two basic traits which help define their best career direction: 1) they are extremely interested and in-tune with how other people are feeling, and 2) they enjoy creating structure and order, and are extremely good at it. Ideally, the ISFJ will choose a career in which they can use their exceptional people-observation skills to determine what people want or need, and then use their excellent organizational abilities to create a structured plan or environment for achieving what people want.

One of my possible career paths is child care, and as silly as it sounds, it was exactly what I needed to read today. Nannying for almost two years was my most favorite job - more than writing, more than editing. I have high hopes for this mommy job!

{five}

Here is a just found picture from my MIL's camera! Will and I where we got engaged, 6 months into our marriage, right before we moved to NOLA.

{six}

Okay people, taking a poll about my bloggy-blog. I'm thinking of changing the name to "The Julie View" (same as my Twitter handle) from "The Corner with a View" (for simplicity's sake). I'm not in the mood to start a new blog, just fixin' up the original for now. May even add a tagline... and an actual, personalized header!

{seven}

I miss my family! But they're having a good time anyways.

Four of the six of us

The dogs in my sister's high school uniform shirts

Oh hey, E!

Happy Friday, everybody!!

Five Favorites: Take Two

Editing articles is leaving me in need of a brain break... linking up with the fabulous Hallie!

ONE

Disney (Children's) Radio on Pandora. 

Yes, Pandora. I have a Spotify too, but there is nothing more fabulous than this station, especially when I am under deadline. Disney songs and soundtracks, as well as the likes of a Motown mix, Jack Johnson, Regina Spektor, A Fine Frenzy, New Republic, Joshua Radin, Florence + The Machine and even Adele.

More importantly, though:



and



Et cetera, et cetera - more where that came from!

TWO

Netflix.

I know, we're terribly behind on this. Will and I opened our own Netflix account because we wanted to watch the fourth season of Arrested Development after re-watching the first three seasons. We are pretty disappointed with how it started, so we took a break and watched Sherlock. ZOMG. Now we're watching the sixth season of Burn Notice, in between viewings of childhood favorites. We watched the Great Mouse Detective a few nights ago -- still fabulous!

We love our Amazon Prime, but daaaaang guurl. Netflix, you fine.

THREE

Care packages.

My mom sent me a hug in a box! Two jars of jam (blackberry from my uncle's farm; tart cherry from Michigan), peanut butter cookies (more Michigan love), gummy bears for me (devoured), gum for Will, a maternity shirt, a few pieces of non-forwarded mail, and letters from the family.

Overly happy picture I sent my Mom

I adore mail of all varieties, and feel very blessed with the correspondence family and friends have been keeping up with us since we moved down South almost two months ago! I am trying to keep up with writing thank you and regular cards; e-mails too!

FOUR

Will.

Okay, maybe unfair to put him under my "favorites" since we're married, but how else can I categorize this drawing he did during birth class?

Let's just say, things got interesting once he added the shark.

Or how he asked the nurse unnecessarily complicated questions during birth class... (hopefully not sparking terror in any of the ladies there!)
Or the straight face he kept when she queried about his level of knowledge about sutures...
Or the crazy grin on his face when the nurse confirmed that we could skip the tour of the postpartum ward... (He gave me the breakdown anyways: bed, table, desk, bathroom, chair/couch, bed for baby. Bam.)

Then, in the midst of swinging my arm ridiculously high as we sauntered down the hall away from the other suckers couples, we began to literally skip away from class 30 minutes early. That was his favorite part of class: leaving!

My husband is a good sport during this whole third trimester adventure. He makes sure we go to the pool almost every day so preggo here can get my 30 minutes of movement in; he lets me sleep in past 7 a.m.; he asks me how the baby is doing and humors me when I tell him to LOOK! THE BABY IS MOVING!!!!! (but mostly, never when he is looking); he attempts to not give me a technical medical answer when I am looking for an emotional/ empathetic one; he is always up for the adventures I propose, be it an impromptu walk outside, trying out a local snow cone shop, or a triple whammy library/ art museum/ bank day.

See? Favorite.

FIVE

The Mirror Magazine.

Mary C. Tillotson and Joy Pullmann, two college friends + reporter colleagues, and I started a new online publication: The Mirror Magazine. It's still new and budding, and I just love it. "Women speak about living traditional values in the modern, post-feminist world" is our mission statement. We're taking submissions, we're on Facebook and Twitter, and we're gearing up for the long-haul. We'd love for you to read along!

Here is one of our readers, and one of my new favorite blogs: This Felicitous Life. Laura, this is my public shout-out that I can't wait for you to write for us too!!

Happy Wednesday, y'all!

Adventure Is Out There

As seen at The Mirror Magazine

This one's for the independent gal, wondering where her life is going - wondering what's she's doing, and if she's missing something, and where her time is truly going.

Adventure is out there! And you are fearfully and wonderfully made. You are not intended to stand still, unless it is to feel the breeze or catch the rain. You are never "stuck" - and if you find yourself waiting, use the time well.

10. Read a book.

What is more precious than developing your mind? Catch up on old favorites (Ella Enchanted, anyone?) and new finds. Move away from the laptop and your phone, and just fall into the coziness of reading (or listening to books on tape, if that is better!).

9. Drink and be merry! 

Sometimes, a good beer can just hit the spot. Or chilled red wine with dinner - divine. Even better - visit a winery, or a brewery, or a distillery, if that's more your flavor. Take a friend (or family member), sign up for a tour, and enjoy yourself.

8. Find purpose in your work.

Why are you working in that job? It is one thing to make money (which is a very important); it is another thing to find joy. Yes, there are hard days, and there will be worse days, but what makes you keep at it? What makes you tick? How do you feel after doing a good job? Do you need more feedback? Are you open to criticism? Talk to your boss; be on the same page so that you can be the best member of the team possible.

7. Keep up with friends.

In this age of technology, do more than a "what's up?" text. Keep them updated on your life via e-mail, handwritten letter or phone call, and be just as earnest to talk about their life. Be open to friends not being close to you any more, and open to finding new friends as well. There are so many people on this adventure - stick to the ones who stick to you.

6. Explore possibilities.

As an introvert, it can be very daunting to try new things, but very rewarding as well. I took tennis lessons when I was younger and enjoyed them, but never got particularly good as my family plays for kicks and giggles. After college, since I am never going to play lacrosse again, or soccer seriously, I decided it was time for a new venture. I took lessons at our swim club, and lo and behold! I was not the worst or the best! And I made a few tennis buddies of my own.

The biggest hardship for many people is remembering that, more likely than not, people are interested in making friends. You will not click with everyone, and having a good conversation does not mean you're destined to be BFFs-forever-and-ever, but as Rudyard Kipling says,  "One man in a thousand, Solomon says,/ Will stick more close than a brother./ And it's worth while seeking him half your days/ If you find him before the other." Take a genuine interest in other people; it'll be nice to step outside yourself for a while.

5. Accept second-best and pursue your passions.

If you want to learn how to knit, do it because you want to, not because you must create the perfect hat on the first try. If you want to learn to fish, you might not catch any fish the first few times. If you go canoeing or kayaking, you may tip over. If you learn calligraphy, it might look like you got drunk with a fancy pen. And that's okay. Do what you love, or think you're going to love - why wait?

4. Travel!

This is the best part of the adventure - going on your own. Traveling is not limited to outside the country, either; there are so many beautiful places in America, even if you go an hour away to a big state park for a picnic lunch and a short hike - what a trip! Outside the country is great as well, but is a different sort of adventure, complete with higher expenses, a possible different language barrier, and less spontaneity.

Of course, if your co-traveler speaks the language... even better!

I also highly recommend traveling with a loved one, both family and friend. The memories you'll make are irreplaceable!

3. Be content.

There is no one made like you, and your challenges are unique. They are hard, and they are going to flavor your life in their own way. But don't let them overwhelm you! Everything can be conquered: poverty, poor self-image, sadness, lack of direction. Be kind to yourself, wonderful you! You're

2. Be brave.



Keep the door open for change! Take a job that isn't your dream job, write on your blog, go out with someone who isn't "perfect", volunteer, speak your mind, respect others, and be open to whatever comes your way -- especially if it's not part of "the plan"! Sometimes, those detours are the most fun.

(Hat tip to my sister, who sent me this video - and cheers to one of the bravest people I know!)

1. Keep it loose, keep it tight.



Amos Lee sings, "But sometimes,/ We forget what we got,/ Who we are./ Oh who are are not./ I think we gotta chance,/ To make it right."

Don't forget who you are, dear reader. Don't get caught up in other people's passions or problems. Don't let another person's dark cloud find its way over your head. Don't let Pintrest make you feel inadequate. Don't let another person's happiness take away from your own. We're all on a different journey, and yours is amazing.

Any more ideas for adventures, dear readers?

A Husband Is Not The Answer

Or a wife. Or a significant other. Or a boyfriend/ girlfriend. Et cetera, et cetera, et cetera, as the King from The King and I liked to say. (I'll be approaching this article as girl to girl, in terms of pronouns, but I presume men can relate too!)

I saw a #singlegirlproblems post which bothers me excruciatingly - that the girl only wanted a husband, not friends. Without channeling Ya-Ya Sisterhood on y'all, I could not disagree more, and here's my basic breakdown of why: husbands are mortal, friends are backboards, you are irreplaceable.

Husbands, Mere Mortals

In Disney's Hercules, Meg is adamant about not being in love.



In the end, she folds. Okay, she's in love. Thanks, Muses. I suppose we all reach that point: we want to be with the one our soul seeks. We want love, the glory of love, the feelings of love, the need and want to be loved, and to love in return. Think of all the Pintrest projects you could attempt if you were in love! We women want to be the jelly to his peanut butter, the other half of his heart.

But already, you're aspiring to an ideal. You are thinking about your side of the bargain; and what about his?

My husband and I complement each other very well- but we're very different. Different food preferences, different cleaning preferences, different schedules, different aspirations. I know, and understand, that I do not fulfill life for him. I'd be more enthusiastic to exercise, more competitive, a better tennis player. But he's a good sport, and goes swimming with his wife the preggo whale.

I don't know what's happening, but it's silly

I love Will just as he is - which is hardly perfect , but perfect for me. Will is human, which means, for as much as I adore him, he'll never fulfill me. And that is why we go to mass with each other every Sunday, and worship and pray before the only human-and-divine man who could possibly satisfy: our Lord, Jesus Christ.

I do not mean this in a cheesy way. I mean this in a very real way. If you have not found your significant other, you are not being punished. You are just as worthy as the girl next to you. You were made in the image of God, which is to say, your soul contains the logos, a piece of the infinite. God is with you, and he will always be with you. This life you're experiencing? It's a journey. There is no end point until Judgement Day, where we will be able to finally know and understand the awesome love and mercy of God.

Being single is a vocation, and it can be a very heavy cross. In this age of social media, it is hard to see pictures of engagements, marriages and babies popping up on every news feed. But do not forget that people in tough marriages or struggling with infertility are also seeing those pictures, and they have their own cross to bear as well. No one is excluded from hardship in this life. Life is hard, and worth pressing on through - more than pressing on, even: enjoying!

There are small joys everywhere - try to find them in the every day, not the grand gestures.

Friends, Backboards (and sometimes backbones)

Ever wonder if a guy is for you? Ask a good friend. She'll tell you straight. You might disagree with her (just a little bit), and then realize (slowly, sooo slowly) that she is right. Near the end of another relationship, my bestie Julia gave me the same advice I had given her a year or so earlier: let it go, and let God. 

Ug. Let what go? My want to be married, and my frustration that my wants were not aligning with another's stars. 

I began earnestly praying, begging God: please let me bear fruit in my single life. Please let me be happy.

And God totally turned my world upside down. In a strange turn of events, I quit my job, I moved home, I sponsored a girl in RCIA, I met my future husband, I co-started the Bright Maidens. These things may not look connected, but they are through God's grace.

I could have done none of the above without my friends. I was encouraged to quit (and stand up for myself) after being treated badly, I was encouraged to move home when I wondered if that was the best decision (YES), I was inspired to sponsor by friends who were actively involved in other types of Church ministry, I met my husband through mutual friends, and I made two very dear friends as we started a new adventure of online evangelization.

Most importantly, it was friendships which kept me grounded in my growing relationship with Will. He met my friends, and I met his. We all got along, and we all learned different sides of each other. And since Will and I continue to be different people (none of this combining names or FB accounts, etc.! Personal autonomy!!), we will both continue to be better friends to each other, as well as cherishing old and new friendships together.

Here is a friend we both have, who always reminds me of why friendships are so important, in addition to marriage and familial relationships - he makes us laugh, he makes us cry, and he reminds us why friends are the ones who love us no matter what (even if we have abrasive personalities):



You Are Irreplaceable

Cue a Michael Buble song. It's so easy to be envious. It's so natural to want to be in the next stage of your life. But you're being given a gift right now: it's not a man, it's an opportunity. Pursue yourself. Pursue your dreams, goals, desires. There is nothing holding you back, except the time it takes to prepare.

I recently stumbled upon a couple interviews I did for my Theology of the Human Heart class in high school. I interviewed my cousin, my aunt/godmother, my mother, and my grandmother. The two that especially struck me were my aunt's and grandmother's - my aunt got married in her later 30's, and loves how much she was able to pursue her career and travel. My grandmother got married in her low 20's, and said that if she could have pursued a career path, she would have enjoyed being a t.v. anchor. My own mother got married at 25 and pursued a Master's instead of an M.D. She made that decision so that she and my Dad could have a bigger family with a more flexible schedule. Everyone made the right decisions for them, even though they came at different points in life, and for different reasons.

Photo credit: madeinhisimage.org

As for me, I've had to overcome being envious of not working for a regular publication full-time. Instead, I'm starting to take freelancing more seriously because that is the path I am currently on, as well as continuing to write book reviews and cultivating my pet projects. My current focus is supporting my husband, keeping house and finance control, and - soon enough - taking care of my little one. I'll be where I want to be eventually, and I'm learning to enjoy a different pace of life. I'm happy, even with the lumps of life. They certainly add perspective and reasons to stay grateful.

When I was single, I worked multiple jobs and I traveled, because that was my post-college plan. I also audited a class at the local seminary, spent time with my family (who I miss terribly right now), wrote, and prayed for my future spouse. This last part is especially important for me, because as much as I prayed, I was extremely humbled to hear that my future MIL had been praying for me as well. Never underestimate the power of prayer, or the miracles that can happen within when you spend more time with our Lord and less time consumed with pettiness, envy, sadness and anger. I'm working on this too, and dear reader, I am praying for you.

God works in mysterious ways, but we are all part of his glorious tapestry. Today, I continue to pray for my spouse. Life is better with him, but not easier. Everyone has challenges, and it is too simple to wish them away by adding in another person. No one can make you happy except you. More money will not make you happy. A different job will not make you happy. If you cannot find happiness within yourself, and accept your circumstances, and work every day to be a better person and a follower of Christ, then having a husband will be like a band-aid over a gaping wound. You need stitches. You need hope. You need to believe that life is an adventure, and you're in for a ride. You need to know that you are worthy of wonderful things happening to you.

A husband is a wonderful companion, but you are irreplaceable, and your happiness is contingent on you.

Why do you say, O Jacob, and speak, O Israel, "My way is hid from the Lord, and my right is disregarded by my God"? Have you not known? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary, his understanding is unsearchable. He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength. Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength, they shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint. (Isaiah 40: 27-31)