#write31days: PostPartum Depression - How Did You Know? // Introduction and Rules of Engagement

Last October, I attempted #write31days but without a serious mindset... quantity really- I wanted to write more. And I did! It was great. Today, I am starting this challenge over with a more guided topic. Postpartum depression.

I discussed ideas with a few friends, and this topic came up multiple times. How do you handle PPD as a Catholic women? How do you handle it with residency? How do you handle it with multiple children? What does it feel like? What should others know about PPD? The questions went on and on...

My "rules" for this series are short: this topic is personal and I am currently living in it. This is not an abstract for a dissertation. I do not have 20/20 hindsight yet. I don't need any medical advice, as I keep in close communication with my own PA + Dr., as well as being married to one. My husband and I practice many different types of coping mechanisms as well, which I will write about too. My situation is 100 percent unique and I am writing only about myself. These posts are directed at no one, and still, I am opening myself up to share my experiences. If I can help one person, it will be worth it. Please respect this adult conversation at face value.

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How do you know you are depressed (PPD) and it's not just the baby blues?

This is the number one question many women ask. I am on baby number three in three years. Shockingly to many, this is not the cause of my depression. My depression has to do (mainly) with external factors in my life which I do not have [much] control over. I mention this because I have bonded with my third child wonderfully, just like I did with my other two.

I mention this because many women dismiss their feelings because they do not fall into the normal realm of what depression looks like. If you are taking anything your baby does personally, that should be a warning sign. A baby is for cuddling and feeding. A baby wants love and affection, and cries because something is wrong - or nothing is wrong! All three of my children spent the first month or two of their lives crying "just because"... baby wearing, baby swinging, and being okay with crying.

My main symptoms are anger and irritability. Everything bugs me - but what sends me over the edge is the perpetual whining of my three year old. Grace repeats herself constantly, and this is normal! There is nothing wrong with this! But for me, it was nails on a chalkboard. Combine this with anxiety if the house descends into madness (thanks, Laura); if I've forgotten something I am supposed to do; if I watch time tock by, paralyzed by what I should do...

This is not a normal response to stress. This is, at the very least, a reason to talk to a medical professional. If you have a feeling something is off, your intuition is probably right. Don't ignore it.

I knew something was wrong when Grace began whining and I just had to leave the room; I wanted to punch the wall repeatedly. I called the phone nurse at my OB's office, and as I told her my symptoms, I started sobbing.

I am currently taking medicine, which I will address in another post. Medicine combined with exercise and other coping mechanisms for healthy living is key - we cannot expect medicine alone to "fix" my feelings, anymore than we should think "natural living" is enough for women to cope.

With my first two children, I would feel sad and overwhelmed and stressed from time to time... with Stephen, there were times when I wanted to leave the house. I wanted to punch the wall; I wanted to cry and yell; I wanted to curl up in a ball and ignore everyone. These are not normal response to stress. My medicine is only 20 mg, but it is enough. When I hear whining, I can respond calmly or ignore it. I can find order in the chaos and I can laugh. I am 110 percent a better mother taking medicine, and I feel much more like myself.

And this is really the most telling part of depression - I didn't feel like myself. I didn't know this version of Julie, and I didn't like it. I love my family and I wanted to enjoy these young days. This is why I sought help and now, this is why I am writing about postpartum depression and anxiety. The only thing to fear is *not* accepting help. Don't try to rationalize your feelings or dismiss them. If you need help, ask for it. This is scary, and that is okay.

Before Grace's eye surgery; when I had first started medication

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In Defense of Self-Soothing

Imagine a scene of three children and a mother is reading them the charming "Big Red Barn" book before bed. It's quiet in your scene, I'm sure. Meanwhile, in my reality, Stephen is crying his face off instead of eating. Laura is helping me turn the pages and Grace is reading her own book.

A few months ago (about three, to be exact), if this would happen, my anxiety would SAIL sky high. My postpartum depression did not manifest itself in sadness, but irritability and anger. That kind of crying would send my nerves into overstimulation and I'd shut down and have to leave the room.

Will and I are focusing on my coping mechanisms: food prep, cooking, exercise, sleep, and letting chaos reign. It's okay. Even when it's not.

I remember a friend who, a few years ago, was deeply depressed; but, as a nursing student, she refused to go on medication because she knew it changed her body's chemistry. But she was miserable.

I can empathize to a certain point. Will and I talked about a timeline for me to go off my PPD medication as well, and I talked to my OB and PA about it as well. I can feel the difference. I can remain calm in the face of my son screaming even though his diaper was changed, he was fed, and he was being held. Sometimes, the baby is going to cry. Sometimes, the baby is going to self-soothe, and fall asleep via crying. Stephen just did. It seems magical now to hear his little snores. He was just *so* tired.

Haven't you ever felt like a baby? So tired you just want to scream and cry and eat ice cream and sleep at the same time? It's okay. I ate brownies for dinner tonight, and now that the kids are down, I'll go eat a second course of pork, rice and salad. Some days, ya know? Gotta eat backwards dinner. Gotta be alone and not talk to anyone and relish that.

It's been a long day, as well as the end of Will's "staycation" (he had a few days off of SICU in a row, which made this month bearable). I'm working on school prep and wondering if a calm normal exists, or if life is a giant exercise in self-soothing and juggling. I'm guessing the latter. It has never slowed down in my 28 years alive, and - if anything! - kids speed up the process. They also help you appreciate the more important things, like being together, laughing and having fun, and loving one another.

Then again, God gave us toddlers to take everyone's pride down a few notches. Toddlers don't give a damn about anything. They will ignore you and dump all their blocks out and look you in the eye while throwing their dinner on the floor. It's amazing. I am no longer crying over dinners [I spent time researching, preparing and serving] being ignored and thrown on the floor since instituting "toddler tapas" and "picnics" to the schedule.

How do you self-soothe? What makes you tick?

I hope you all are well, dear readers. I hope you take time to self-soothe, and time to re-connect. I hope you don't worry about other people's perception of you, and that you love what makes you tick.

I'm off to eat dinner, watch an episode of Elementary, and maybe fix zucchini bread since the air is cooler now. I wish you good eats and many reminders of what a treat life is, truly, for each of us.

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NFP as a Mama of Three

It's the end of NFP Awareness Week, so I'm going to throw in a few cents as a mama with three kids under three.

Natural Family Planning is getting to know the woman's fertility through various means (mucus, hormone monitor, basal thermometer, etc.) and then, making a decision about when to have sex in order to avoid, conceive or whatever. This is called TTA (trying to avoid), TTC (trying to conceive) and TTW (trying to whatever).

We have a child from each of these. Grace was a TTW - we were open to having a baby, and based on where I was in my cycle, we had a 5 percent chance of conceiving. Laura was TTC - we wanted to have another baby close to Grace. Stephen was TTA - the postpartum method we were using was not successful, and his conception was considered a method failure. This does not mean that NFP = children even when you are avoiding. Plenty of people successfully avoid using the same method. To me, this means that God wanted Stephen in our lives. I cannot imagine life without this chunky monkey. Practically, I also changed how I track my fertility postpartum!

This time around, I started charting with my teacher before my 56 days were up. After a lady has a baby, she is definitely infertile for the first 56 days. After that, even if you are breastfeeding, your fertility can come back (as we learned) before the usual six months. It is unusual, but it does happen.

We are currently using the Marquette method and working closely with a wonderful teacher as we navigate the postpartum period. Since I do not have any health problems we have to work around, this is the easiest method for us. Every morning, I pee on a stick (we buy with Amazon's subscribe and save - a steal! Especially with five or more items, you get a 15 percent discount) and my ClearBlue monitor (Also on sale with Prime currently) tells me if my fertility is low, high, or peak.

From the Marquette website:

The Marquette Model (MM) system of NFP brings 21st century technology to NFP by using the ClearBlue Easy Fertility Monitor, a device used at home which measures hormone levels in urine to estimate the beginning and end of the time of fertility in a women's menstrual cycle. The information from the monitor can be used in conjunction with observations of cervical mucus, basal body temperature, or other biological indicators of fertility. The MM was developed by professional nurses and physicians at Marquette University in the late 1990s. A recent (2007) study published in the Journal of Obstetric, Gynecologic, and Neonatal Nursing demonstrated a 97-98% efficacy of the MM in avoiding pregnancy when taught by a qualified teacher and correctly applied.

There is more protocol in terms of how many days one should avoid post-peak, and postpartum pre-peak vs. postpartum post-peak, but that is not what this post is about. This post is about why Will and I choose NFP over other methods.

The easiest place to start is our faith. We're Roman Catholic, and as part of our Christian faith, we practice total fidelity. We do not use artificial contraception. The Church does not require us to use NFP, but it does advocate responsible parenthood. "Be fruitful and multiple" does not mean have more children than your sanity, bank account and body can handle. The Church's teaching must be seen through the eyes of total love; it is for communion of body and soul, not a separation.

That being said, NFP is not a Catholic-only method. I know many non-Catholics who use it. Leah Libresco, a Catholic convert from atheism, recently wrote on learning NFP while engaged. She recommends Toni Weschler’s Taking Charge of Your Fertility, which teaches FAM - Fertility Awareness Method, or NFP + barrier methods during avoiding times. TCOYF is the definitive text for learning about one's fertility, reproductive health and charting. This is not only for married folk - charting is the best way to understand how your body is working, and learning to recognize  and interpret changes.

Next, is science. Unlike the popular myth that all NFP methods are the same (or the rhythm method), a woman's fertility is unique and scientists like those at Marquette University, or Dr. Hilgers with his Creighton method, are actively studying women's fertility and have proven, peer-reviewed methods of helping women avoid and achieve pregnancy when practiced correctly. I say "correctly" because this is the danger of NFP - a woman can get pregnant. But this happens to people using birth control methods as well, so I'm nonplussed about this part. I truly think that NFP is as valid a method to avoid and achieve, with the bonus of *knowing* one's fertility (no more guesswork!) and creating an incredible bond with your spouse.

We use the Kindara app to chart - so well organized and a beautiful design. I love that I can add-in more information than what is provided already too.

Finally: love. There is nothing more trust-building than two spouses on board with fertility planning. The husband is equally as involved as his wife; he carries responsibility as she does. This is not always easy. Will and I did not pick NFP because we enjoy this challenge; but is it worth it? Absolutely. We practice fidelity to one another; open communication; incredible vulnerability; respect and acceptance of the total person; value and honor for God's design; true self-sacrifice. The benefits, for us, outweigh the fear.

True love must know sacrifice. This is why our wedding vows speak of leaving our mother and father and joining to our spouse. The current statistics on divorce is about 50 percent**, which is terrifying. NFP users have a lower rate - hovering around 9.5 percent. Having sex is not just for creating a child. It's also for bonding! But the accountability and responsibility is still there, and we take that seriously.

It's hard to be pregnant. It might not seem that way, especially coming from someone who has had three successful pregnancies in three years. We were open to that. We were open to that challenge. I would not recommend this path to most people, but we feel very blessed to have our three children and be in a position to care for them. It should not, however, and is not to be taken for granted. People love asking if we're done now that we've had our boy. Hopefully not! Will and I are still discerning, as is part of our marriage.

**
"Which Method of NFP Is Right For Me?" quiz

**

I love strolling down memory lane. I love thinking about all the walks we went on while dating and engaged; hiking and talking about Big, Philosophical questions and telling stories and discussing what we wanted in life. Will and I decided that we wanted to spend our lives together - eating and grocery shopping; chores and cleaning up after little people; in good times and in bad; in morning sickness and in health. I thought I loved Will when we got engaged, and even more when we got married. And I did. I love him even more now. Be assured that marriage is hard for us too, and NFP is harder. There is a lot of dying to self. NFP strips away the pretension and the pride, and leaves us to face our own reality. Each NFP experience is unique, and I like knowing that it is part of our love story. It's anecdotal evidence, but in the search for fullness of the human experience, what else is there?

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** EDIT: A friend sent me this article, which says that divorce rate is well below 50 now and that this statistic is incorrect. Happy to hear!

Our Marriage Is Stronger Because My Husband Isn’t My Best Friend

Several years ago I attended my best friend’s wedding. She and her husband shared their first dance to the tune of “Lucky” by Jason Mraz and Colbie Calliat. You know, the one that goes, “Lucky I’m in love with my best friend . . .” We hear that sentiment all the time—that marrying your best friend is the ultimate goal. But I find the ideal of my husband being my best friend a romantic notion that sells the love between spouses short.

I did not marry my best friend. My best friend is married, has two children, and is currently visiting Poland with her family. My husband, Will, on the other hand, is the best man I know, the love of my life, and the father of our two daughters. We support each other, discuss the mundane and the extraordinary, play games, work out, have fun, enjoy each other’s company, share everything, and respect each other. But at the end of the day, he is still not my best friend; he is much more.

There is an important distinction between the role of best friend and the role of spouse, and I would be minimizing my husband’s role in my life if I called him anything else. I believe that a spouse and a best friend are analogous but not the same. It may sound nitpicky, but “best friend” can never do justice to the far more intimate calling of the marital relationship.

Monica Mendez Leahy, who has more than twenty years of experience counseling couples, believes that the modern terms we associate with our spouse, such as soulmate or BFF, directly result from a lack of married role models. Many couples these days go the route of living together without being married. “Therefore, younger couples aren't seeing as many examples of marriage and are left to speculate on what a marital partnership consists of,” Leahy says. “The closest thing we come up with is best friends with benefits, plus a legal piece of paper?”

I don’t deny that friendship is critical between spouses. In Leahy’s book, she says, “If you analyze long-lasting, happy marriages, you will see a solid friendship at the root of each one.” She calls it the Friendship Factor. “They treat each other as if their partner was their dearest and best friend in the world,” Leahy says. “And in most cases, that’s exactly what they are.”

If friendship is an important foundation for marriage, shouldn’t married couples strive toward best friendship? Leahy’s answer is no. “If a couple strives to be best friends, they’re aiming too low. The relationship between spouses is so special, sacred even, that there are laws to protect and reward individuals who choose this maximum level of togetherness. The bond between spouses is so highly sought after and rewarding when reached, why get married if you’re aiming to shortchange your relationship?”

The truth is, the partnership of marriage is stronger and more intimate than the decades of history you might have with even your closest friend. In Committed: A Skeptic Makes Peace with Marriage, Elizabeth Gilbert writes, “To be fully seen by somebody, then, and be loved anyhow—this is a human offering that can border on miraculous.” I agree with Gilbert. A loving marriage produces a bond that I know I’ll never have with just a best friend.

During our marriage prep, when my husband and I were prompted to share one instance where we were proud of the other person, we got a glimpse of this kind of miraculousness that Gilbert describes. Will said he was proud of me when I left my desk job for a very different, active job. He was proud of me for taking the risk and trusting myself. His unrelenting support of me—in whatever I choose to do—is what keeps me in awe of him, and I give him the same support.

When I call my best friend to talk, we are sharing our life, thoughts, and feelings with each other. When Will and I share our days, we are talking about our life—the one we are building together. Our marriage is an exercise in trust, but this is not an esoteric exercise; we share real responsibilities and goals. A year and a half ago, our oldest daughter was diagnosed with cerebral palsy. I told Will I was scared, and he helped me summon my inner strength. His calmness, my optimism, and our love for each other have carried us through all the trials we’ve faced.

In my experience, the marriage vows of “for better or worse” are literal; the commitment that spouses make goes beyond any friendship possible. Marriage is a lifelong commitment. This person shouldn’t just know you, accept you, and laugh at your jokes—they are obligated to you financially, legally, and personally. No matter how loyal I am to my best friends, we still have separate lives—and I like that. My husband and I, however, are committed to the life we are building together—career ambitions, children, each other.

We may have moved away from marriages of prudence in favor of marriages of love, but this has not diminished the expectations and responsibilities that come from two people dedicating their lives to one another. We may relate our romantic relationships to friendship because we understand that kind of bond and therefore elevate it. But in marriage, we shouldn’t want another shade of friendship. There is a magic to marriage. Marriage gives us a noble purpose, a relationship to protect and nurture, and new responsibilities to contend with together. That’s why my spouse isn’t my best friend; he’s my husband, and that’s so much better.

Originally published at Verily Magazine

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Picnic Post and Poconos

Hi gang!

We're off to vacation today! We're going to the Poconos (1-2 hours away, depending on who you drive with) with my family and in-laws. My mom and two of my sisters arrived last night, and we'll leave soonish. Wanted to drop a little link love for the next week:

Three billion miles away, no problem: Houston, we have pictures of Pluto! Thanks NASA!

If you've never heard of Sr. Theresa A. Noble, now's the time. A former atheist/ current Catholic nun, she writes (well!!) for Patheos. Her latest is gold: 5 Tips: When Friends and Family Disagree on Gay Marriage

I've been perusing the web for some supplementary reading for my AP kids, and ran across this great piece by Lawrence Reed at The Freeman (publication of FEE, or Foundation for Economic Education) about Anne Hutchinson: America’s First Feminist Was a Radical Libertarian

If you're interested in urban planning, I loved this piece from The Manhattan Institute’s Center for Rethinking Development: Four Jane Jacobs Ideas that Should Have Made a Difference

Laura at Mothering Spirit touched a lot of hearts with her piece "the essay I never wrote"

As a ballet lover and a mother of a child with cerebral palsy, I adored this post on the NYC ballet: "The New York City Ballet Conducts Workshops For Disabled Children"

Nike collaborated with a CP kid to make these shoes too. So cool.

For my vacation week, I bought Harper Lee's latest and am very excited about it. NPR's review is spot-on, especially concerning the initial backlash: 'Go Set A Watchman' Is A Revelation On Race, Not A Disappointment

This is a surprising piece from NYT's Modern Love section about how a couple faces adversity: Superheroes, Just for Each Other

Thanks First Things for this woman-roar!! piece: Learning from Bodies

Finally, this is THE BEST article I have read on marriage, well, ever: The Wedding Toast I’ll Never Give

Cheers from us Baldwins, catch y'all in a week!

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Try Something New-ish: Reader Feedback

I'm home again, home again, jiggity-jig. I fly with two under two (bet you want to read THAT story) and my eyes are adjusting to contacts only until my new, unbroken glasses are ready, and yeah! Messy-ish galore around here, and it just feels good to be home and DONE with grading for the summer. I have a long list of half-written blog posts and a nice stack of books to review.

So! Let's hear from you, my dear readers!

1. Where are you currently situated?
2. What is your vocation?
3. What is your passion?
4. Are you religious?

{A good friend of mine from high school told me last weekend that he likes to read my blog, even though he's not religious. I'm so glad he does (hi Danny!) and I am glad we can all have respect and conversations, since we're all on different life journeys. I'm especially glad this blog isn't pidgin-holed away!}

5. Favorite book to recommend to people?
6. A few of your favorite things?
7. What do you like about The Corner with a View?
8. Anything you'd like me to write more about? Any question you're dying to ask me? Curious about residency, long distance relationships, cerebral palsy, procrastinating, teaching, editing or why I update my instagram more than my blog?
9. What does the phrase "beauty will save the world" mean to you?

Answer 1 or 9 or none, but at the very least, watch this video of fifth grade boys as they synchronize swim on land. Hilarious!

Hope you're having a great week, y'all! Praying and reflecting a lot on what happened in Charleston, and very glad to see the awesome sense of justice and mercy rising up. It is not the multitudes of failures that define our country, but the inherent goodness of our people in spite of tragedy.

UPDATE: A few of you are having trouble submitting comments - feel free to message me or comment elsewhere, like on the FB page!

Julie 101: The Top Twenty

A combination of things, so first: the sweet Sarah Babbs tagged me on Instagram to share 20 fun facts about myself; I'm sure this isn't kosher buuuut I cannot type on my phone for that long right now AND my IG has a habit of shutting down on me at inconvenient times, and I just can't lose another post that I spent more than 2 minutes on... here goes!

1. I don't believe a person can peak. It limits potential.

2. I played lacrosse in high school.

3. I was in a sorority in college; still very proud to be a KKG!

4. Alfred Sisley is my favorite painter.

5. I am a champion hug giver. Friends call them "Julie hugs"; sort of a tucking in motion.

6. My life mantra:

7. At age 23: I was offered my dream job - an editorial writer at a major D.C. newspaper - and I turned it down because I wanted to stay close to Will. Not a very modern attitude, but some things are worth missing in exchange of a better possibility. 

8. After finishing a review session with my AP kids on Saturday afternoon though, I think I'm living a very cool, very real dream. I never thought I'd be a teacher. I love it.

9. When I taught my kids about the Korean War, I was able to show them pictures of the country when I took a  two week trip to Asia to visit April (May-June 2011). It was my first trip overseas and I adored every day of being there. Here is Geoje Island:

10. Favorite genre: mysteries.

11. I was a wicked good penpal in college - I loved writing friends! Especially if I needed a break from writing papers without losing my mojo, I would write a letter. Since college, I have severely tapered off, but not for lack of want. April, of course, is National Writing Letter Month. Quick! Writing a few tonight!!

12. I prefer listening to books on tape, especially long novels - Anna Karenina, Harry Potter series and All the Kings Men were excellent. Excellent narrators only, please.

13. The End of the Affair by Graham Greene is my favorite book; The Habit of Being by Flannery O'Connor is my favorite collection; "The Four Quartets" is my favorite poem; Introduction to Christianity by Joseph Ratzinger/ Papa B is my favorite apologetics read.

14. Favorite modern lit? The Hunger Games trilogy, hands down. Will asked me to read the first one as his birthday present (to him - so we could see the movie together); I read the first one waiting for my flight to ATL (off to visit Vivian!) and live-texted him the entire time. It was an incredible read, though the second (Catching Fire) is my favorite.

15. I went to Germany with my sister for a week, and it was awesome. (My sisters K&M are flying there now for 10 days!) It was my first trip to Europe.

16. My favorite food is fruit pie (especially cherry, apple and peach).

17. I always thought I wanted lots of sons... but so far, I am not disappointed. I am seriously smitten with these two.

18. I try to keep an open mind to life - I'll try most things once, food included:

Tokyo street vendor cuisine

Tokyo fish market

^^That was a mistake/ Korean specialty.

(And some things are worth repeating!)

19. Fangirl moments:

I've met Justice Clarence Thomas (June 2009):

and Rep. Ron Paul! (February 2009):

Bucket list includes: Justice Scalia, J.K. Rowling, the Holy Fathers (Papa B and/or Papa F - a girl can dream, right?!)

20. Culinary claim-to-fame: I'l fix you the best grilled cheese you've ever tasted.

Anything else y'all want to know? Hey ho!

My View (vol. 30)

What I am reading: The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing by Marie Kondo

And a couple dozen essays by students...

Love what I am eating: yogurt, carrots + hummus, Baptism cake, almond and apricot Kind bars

Meal planning: 

I need ease and comfort for this next week, plus dishes I can send to work with Will.

• Tilapia, pesto pasta & carrots
• Baked chicken, rice & green beans
• Broccoli Quiona Casserole
• Enchilada Pasta

This week in history:

Jonathan Crombie died at age 48. Crombie played the character of Gilbert Blythe (my literary crush) in the 1980s miniseries Anne of Green Gables and Anne of Avonlea, based on the the Anne of Green Gables series by L.M. Montgomery.

Gilbert Blythe is the school competitor/nemesis/ friend/ spurned lover/ friend/ dearest love of Anne Shirley, protagonist of Anne of Green Gables. This series was one of the most important reads and re-reads of my girlhood, and Crombie's portrayal of Gilbert in the mini-series was perfection.

Here are a few articles/ tributes I enjoyed:

Jonathan Crombie, Anne of Green Gables actor, dead at 48, CBC News

Why We Loved Gilbert Blythe, The New Yorker

Love Lessons from ‘Anne of Green Gables’, Acculturated 

25 Times Gilbert Blythe From “Anne Of Green Gables” Melted Your Heart, Buzzfeed

12 Reasons No Man Will Ever Live Up To Gilbert Blythe From “Anne Of Green Gables”, The Frisky

“Gilbert, I’m afraid I’m scandalously in love with you.” - Anne Shirley (and every girl)

I will be in denial forever. Jonathan Crombie was Gilbert Blythe! (And the third Andrew Sullivan movie never happened!!) To the best of my knowledge, Anne and Gilbert are still living in Canada and did not age past the last book...

Otherwise, the girls and I are having a lot of time together! Here is Grace sneaking Laura's binky because time with her dino wubbanub is being severely limited. She is giving me the grumpy face?!

Laura land:

One of the sweetest things about Grace is how much she loves her family. She will crawl into your lap and hug you, she will snuggle when it's sleep time, and Heaven forbid Laura lets her binky leave her lips... Grace will stuff it securely back in her mouth.

Summer is coming:

For all you wonderful readers - yes! A surprise! Updated blog layout by college friend/ bestie's sister Margaret McCarthy Design and new header by another college chum - the very talented Anna, who is opening her own shop soon! It's clean, whimsical and lovely.

Just like me! Wink.

Prayers: All those affected by the earthquake in Nepal! So tragic.

For us - Will is sick and I am injured (pulled chest muscle, possible carpal tunnel) and we have to keep going. For Grace and Laura to stay safe and well; their energy levels are up, up, up! (Fortunately, we're never too tired for many a dance party!)

Next week, I am going to: Survive. Will has Monday off (day of rest!), but the rest of the week is non-stop, including three night shifts in a row.

Any plans next week, readers?

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Weekly Wallpaper! {pretty, free}

Blessed Is She's Erika created a beautiful wallpaper for this week (or maybe longer, in my case, because I like it so much) based on yesterday's Gospel!

Download here!

I Declare This A Good Day

These girls:

This guy:

My Mom:

These links:

8 Picture Books for Lent and Easter at Carrots for Michaelmas
What to read next if you want to branch out from your usual genres at Modern Mrs. Darcy
Arnold Lobel’s Frog and Toad Stories at Crisis Magazine
The Problem with Quiet Times at Christianity Today
Finding Beauty: A How-To at The Irish Rover
What Are Your Favorite High-Quality Freezer Staples? at The Kitchn

What We’re Watching: Revisiting the Moynihan Report at Education Next (I wrote my senior thesis on the Moynihan Report - super fascinating, even 50 years later!)

After Seven Years by Raymond Moley (pdf)

"Written by an adviser to FDR who helped assemble the president's "brain trust", After Seven Years is a must-read for anyone claiming to be a student of the New Deal. Written in the midst of man-made economic calamity, Moley supplies an insider's account of the twists and turns in policy responses to the Great Depression, about which he for many good reasons ultimately became disillusioned." --Mises.org

How I Work Now:

(Thanks PhotoBooth!)

(This is actually pretty difficult/ a lot of one hand typing.)

Today is my last day of maternity leave - back to teaching classes on Monday. My mom leaves tomorrow, and we'll have a family night once Will wake up after his night shift nap (because he works day shift on Sunday!). This night float month for SICU already feels better than the month in MICU; maybe because I am asleep for half his shift? Maybe because I get to text him in the wee hours of the morning while nursing?

Last night, Will and I went out to a local tapas restaurant and shared a pitcher-ish of sangria. Mom stayed home and watched Chicken Run with Gracie and Laura. It felt really good to have us/ non-stress/ shared alcoholic beverage time time.

Right Now:

Laura snores her thanks for y'all reading!

#5Faves: Second Baby Buys

We do not need a lot for this baby - but a few things were in order for Bebe Deux:

{one}

(Her very own) Wubbanub

Before Grace's first Christmas, we drove from New Orleans to Lexington, KY and Toledo, OH for two residency interviews before arriving home. On the way up, we stopped at a family friend's house for the night. Will's best friend from medical school and his wife Whitney gave Grace her wubbanub. Whitney was in her intern year of pediatrics and said these were a big hit. Honestly, I was dubious. A stuffed animal attached to a binky? Really...interesting?

Then, we stopped by Will's aunt and uncle's house for his UK interview. His little cousin M "borrowed" Grace's little binky and we couldn't find it. Desperately, I gave her the wubbanub and life was wonderful again!

Over a year later, Grace is still enamored with her dino. Sure, it looks silly - but the animal is light enough to carry around, sits on the baby's chest, helps the baby learn to grab on, and becomes a fast friend in the middle of the night.

And for all those times when Grace just needs some time to relax, her wubbanub and her blanket are there.

{two}

Baby Starters Textured Dot Blanket with Satin Trim

Grace has this blanket in blue, and it is her most favorite possession (after her dino wubbanub). Satin on one side and velvety on the other - this blanket is super soft and cuddly. Machine washable to boot!

{three}

Angelcare Bath Support

This just arrived in the mail - and with all the rave reviews, and I am very excited to try and use it! We do not have the sink space we did in New Orleans, so the babies have to be washed in the tub - but small babies are slippery and small. This is the perfect solution: mildew resistant, light, contorts to hold baby slightly upright.

{four}

Schwinn Discover Double Swivel Stroller

This is the gift of all gifts. We are being given this beeeeeautiful stroller, and will be celebrating spring by walking in the Life Without Limits 5k in Philly this April (for cerebral palsy research!). It's also going to give me few excuses to get outside with the girls every day during the summer, and a nice outlet for exercise and freedom.

It'll also be a good reason to revive my postpartum Couch to 5k training!

{five}

Extras!

• Baby month stickers: still looking - any cute suggestions? I like this one and this one the most so far (I should probably order soon!)
• Noodle & Boo products: Your baby will smell like Heaven.
• Baby Shea Moisture lotion: when the mean cold winds dry out baby's soft skin!
• Boudreaux's Butt Paste Diaper Rash Ointment: yep.
• More bibs! These are perfect spit-up/ teething bibs - and so pretty too! These are the best for messy food.
• Diapers and wipes - we buy Luvs and Pampers.

Anything you splurged on for your baby? Any basics you're re-stocking?

Linking up with Jenna - hey-oh!