I do most of my work online, so I find myself at the computer often - and it's starting to really drain me. When Grace goes down for a nap, I open up my computer to type-type-type till I hear the familiar Call of the Awakened Beast. More often than not, however, I find myself reading home improvement and interior design sites. I find them fascinating. They're so organized! They're so original!
I read words like "decor scheme" and I think, What is my decor scheme?!?
Our apartment is cozy - it's big enough for us three, and a little snug when company comes over - we invite everyone anyways. Part of the Christian life is hospitality, and I want our house to be as inviting as it is beautiful.
But first, something we each must answer is the call of the present. We must do the dishes; take a shower; complete our work; attend mass; love our family, friends, neighbors and self; eat; sleep.
As the move approacheth, I've been overwhelmed by the piles I create around me. In my efforts to organize, I create more work. The logic is, the more I organize, the more organized I will be! Instead, I am exhausted by the ring-around-the-rosy activity. So, yesterday, I started conquering piles. It was also exhausting. But more satisfying - thank you notes, check. Packing up three boxes, check.
As I enter my real, grown-up life, I still feel my sea legs wobbling when it comes to meal planning or laundry or decorating or organizing. I suppose the reason I am most excited about our new home is that it will be just Will's and mine, and we'll both have income, and we'll have more space to grow as a family.
Still: the move looms. The computer distracts. And as I prayed to God, begging him to help me be more organized, I recognized a voice distinctly God's: Julie, stop procrastinating. You're not going to pack perfectly or complete your to-do list on time. Get over it and get moving.
Perfection is the opposite of progress.
Today in the Gospel, we were told that God would never (ever!) orphan us. We are his family - he created us to love, out of love. This is essential to faith - the knowledge that, even when we do not feel loved, we are. Mightily loved. He even loves people who try to be perfect not as our Heavenly Father is perfect, but as HGTV Magazine is perfect.
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| Pretty perfect, but earthly standards. |
Sometimes, what we have now is enough to carry us forward. Packing boxes is less glamorous than perusing the interwebz, but infinitely more rewarding and helpful. Say yes to love and less to self - it's a good way to serve God by DIY, y'all.
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