Snow Weekend

"Snow-flakes" by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Out of the bosom of the Air,
      Out of the cloud-folds of her garments shaken,
Over the woodlands brown and bare,
      Over the harvest-fields forsaken,
            Silent, and soft, and slow
            Descends the snow.

Even as our cloudy fancies take
      Suddenly shape in some divine expression,
Even as the troubled heart doth make
      In the white countenance confession,
            The troubled sky reveals
            The grief it feels.

This is the poem of the air,
      Slowly in silent syllables recorded;
This is the secret of despair,
      Long in its cloudy bosom hoarded,
            Now whispered and revealed
            To wood and field.

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Happy First Birthday, Laura!

Hey, so remember when Laura was born??

Are you my mother?

Yep, you're my mother!!

I think I'm gonna like it here...

It's apparently been a year. Happy first birthday, Laura! 

Fine, so a year ago at this time, I was still in triage. Small details. 

Hooray! It's Laura's day! Time for her very own Camelbak. She liked. 

She got her own box of tissues too, in the tradition of Grace's first birthday... Laura is not the tissue-puller of the family, however; she would much rather have a free pass to play in the toilet. 

This Camelback was the clear winner. There is no water inside it. (Yet!)

She was overwhelmed by the paparazzi. 

Her coping mechanism was to start eating her cake. Mmm, white chocolate. 

My parents came in town for the weekend to celebrate our Lady Laura! 

We sang Happy Birthday, and she suspiciously poked at her cake. Clearly her father's child.

She even handed her piece to Will at one point... but she did eat a few bites of well-deserved birthday cake. 

My parents left early that afternoon to catch their flight home, so we went to the park. It was a very fun transition of Laura walking around the playground!

Happy birthday, my Laura the explorer. 

At one, Laura:

• walks and falls; picks herself up with a grin
• climbs on everything; leans her head back (expects to be caught)
• transitions off couches, beds
• says "all done"; "dada"; "yes"
• babbles and smiles
• teases her sister
• plays with blocks, stuffed animals
• looks through books
• plays chase/ tag 
• initiates peek-a-boo
• has eight teeth
• loves fruit, cheese, veggie noodles
• cuddles with her mama
• head-over-heels for her dad 
• constant playmate of her sister
• shares a room with Grace
• has the sweetest disposition

Laura's birth story

Laura: 0-5 months

Laura: 6 month

Possibly the hardest thing to imagine when you have your first child is how you'll love your second child as much. Laura smashed all doubts. She makes me believe we'll welcome our third with just as eager arms. She has the biggest smile, loves her family so much, and is always ready for the next adventure. 

Here's to many more, my sweet heart! Happy birthday, Laura Kathleen! 

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Days 11 & 12: up, up and up!

Okay, it is officially difficult to post every day. Travel dispensation? We arrived in Cincinnati very late on Saturday evening due to our generous rest stop policy, and today, the girls and I drove to Louisville to spend part of the week with Will's family.

After dinner, a surprise thunderstorm rolled through, and Laura was entranced.

The rain did not stop her from standing up on her own, of course.

She taught herself to stand about a week ago, and I am amazed with how nimble she is now.

Yay! Nothing is going to keep her down.

{almost 7.5 months}

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Day 2: Rejection

This isn't the first time, and it certainly won't be the last.

Feeding Laura baby food is like an act of betrayal. The hurt looks, the confusion, the rejection of said food - from Earth's Best, not Earth's Worst. We've filmed it, laughed over, and raised our eyebrow a few times. Everyone says "keep trying!" ... okay then. I fixed a tablespoon of rice cereal to mix with the pictured apple puree (rejected) only to see the tiny jar almost empty on the table. Laura sat in the high chair, food all over her bib.

"How exciting!!!!!" I said to Will; "So, she ate it?"
"No, Grace got to it," he replied.

Grace looks up at me, smiling. Oh well, I think. I scrape the jar, mix the last bit with the cereal, and hear Dylan Moran's voice as Laura gives me another look of despair while I try to finagle the spoonful into her mouth: Rejection.

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Day 1: Baby Bear

In a moment of trying to regain a little sanity, I'm back at blogging for a 31 day writing challenge. Since carpal tunnel and time management limits my time, I'm going to do a series of photo essays on family life as a resident's wife, history teacher and mom. I hope you enjoy!

Laura, our newly seven month old, is trying to stand. This is amazing to me. Our oldest, Grace, has cerebral palsy and never did this at such a young age. But Laura pays no mind to that- she sees her sister move, and she wants to go too (preferably wherever Grace is playing or moving).

This picture was taken soon after returning home from the grocery store - I expected a madhouse since the hurricane is supposed to hit us hard this weekend, but maybe the drizzle kept people at home. Maybe. But not us. All for more yogurt, soup, snacks, and a chance to watch the Wegmans's train go round and round a couple times by Dairy. I even picked up two baby food jars for Laura - she makes funny dislike faces for both yogurt and rice cereal; maybe apples or peas will entice.

Laura's Dad is gone all night - first night in Trauma, this month's rotation. But she climbed all over him earlier while, two floors above, I taught middle schoolers about the Revolutionary War. (I could hear the shrieks of laughter from both girls. Typical with Dad.)

This weekend, we're doing a big clean up of the house, and putting up the new gates, just for Laura. We're still trying to decide where... depending on where this baby bear prowls to next. She's on the move.

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Six Months: Laura

Six months ago, I was having really painful contractions and trying to tough it out before my epidural... six months later, we're playing with baby toes and Laura is pivoting around on the carpet, playing with Grace's tea set.

Most people call her a serious baby, and I do not necessarily disagree - definitely observant. Also, a loving, joy-filled baby. A baby who is content being held and loved; a baby who makes her mama feel so happy to just be her mama. Quality time baby? I think so.

She's also an extremely good sport when her sister climbs into her crib almost every morning.

Grace calls her "rar-rua" and loves her baby sister. Laura even laughs and giggles as Grace tickles her! Sisters, sisters, as the song goes... I love watching them enjoy each other so much.

Laura is growing well - that's the first thing people point out. Yes, physically, of course - and mentally, and in her wonderful personality. We've bonded even more this summer, and Laura is starting to out-smile Grace (if possible!). 

In silly pictures, this is me attempting to get a picture of Laura's one tooth that is poking through the gums, causing her to wail in the evening. Well, it's there!

It was around this age that we really wondered what was going on with your sister - much less interest in moving (at that point). It's amazing watching your body contort and how unwilling you are to stay in one place for too long. Laura Kathleen, keep on moving, trying to crawl, and swim on land. You're almost to the army crawl! (Your 2nd Lt. Uncle Mikey in the Army is going to love that!) You're so strong, intelligent and playful. I'm going to keep enjoying this baby time while it lasts.

Love you so much,
Mama

p.s. but maybe less attempts to roll off couches and beds?

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Laura Kathleen's Birth Story: The Second

This story is also called, The Girl Who Cried Induction...!

In the beginning was the Due Date

The difference between our first baby and our second baby was scheduling. In New Orleans, Will skipped class when I was in labor. His teachers knew I was due and all was fine.

In Bethlehem, we had a very specific window of time because of Will's job and my limited maternity leave with school. This caused a lot of stress on my end, alleviated partially by the presence of my wonderful, helpful mother-in-law (who arrived a week before my due date and stayed a few days after Laura's birth).

Grace came at 40 weeks, 2 days, so I wasn't necessarily in a rush to have this baby. Actually, I remember specifically praying that she would come after my Thursday classes, because then I would be mostly done and my Friday class could watch Thursday's lecture. (Priorities!) I was convinced she would come that weekend...

Bye, bye weekend. Hello, last week of February.

Will had this week off, and BOTH my in-laws were in town to spend time with the new baby. Bebe Deux, however, was quite comfy inside and I don't blame her. It's cold here in February.

Fine, whatever. Monday. Tuesday? WEDNESDAY. I had an appointment with the OB and I discussed induction. It wasn't my preferred plan but March was approaching and March meant Will's SICU. I was super nervous it was going to be as bad busy as January's MICU rotation. In January, Will left around 4:30-5 a.m. and got home after 8 p.m. Another ICU month also meant he would not have any more time off, and could not wait around for the birth to happen. We decided to induce on Friday evening, if she didn't arrive earlier.

Wednesday, Thursday, Friday... I wasn't teaching class this week. I was off and uncomfortable. I kept having pains, but nothing consistent. For dinner that night, I barely finished my sushi roll. I finished packing and gave Gracie kisses ta-ta.

Since we live within walking distance to the hospital, we walked there in the cold and entered the ER, where triage checked me in, and we were paraded around the Emergency Department, with everyone not with a patient cheered us on. It was pretty awesome. We went up to OB, got settled into another triage room and a resident came in to check me. She and Will knew each other from his OB rotation, and it is always fun watching him interact with the other doctors.

She then told me I had advanced from 1 cm to 3 cm in two days, and when she consulted with the attending, they sent me home. I was too far along.

WHAT.

The part where I went home and contracted

We understand: induce a girl at 8 p.m. and she could be having a baby in the wee hours of the morning... so, no sleep. Still ready, and sadly, I walked home with Will. My in-laws were deciding which movie they wanted to watch on Netflix and YAY! We were home in time to watch it with them. They decided to watch The Terminator, a Baldwin family favorite that I had yet to see.

Yeah. Not my first choice for films to contract to... About halfway through, we take a break for popcorn. I am now regularly contracting, but I had an OB on hand (thanks, FIL!) and he didn't think I was in a rush-back-to-the-hospital situation; my MIL was giddy-excited. Will tried to help me feel more comfortable, and then asked why I did not seem to be enjoying the film.

BECAUSE I AM CONTRACTING. And because I don't get it. (Arnold: why is it so scary?!)

Movie over. I appreciate it more and think how this movie would tie into a post. Go to bed. Contractions.

Wake up at 5:45 a.m. to a phone call from the hospital telling me they are too full and will not be inducing me this morning; they will call me when they're able. NOPE I'VE CONTRACTED ALL NIGHT. Oh, says the nurse. Then come on in!

Hospital, here to stay

Let me begin by being upfront with you: I was in triage for six hours. Apparently everyone in the area decided to go into labor and filled up the previously empty wing. I was hooked up to a monitor, in pain, 100% effaced and...

We both needed coffee BADLY.

The Good:

• Will had a really good month in the OB back in October and so we became a floor favorite of people stopping in to say hi! That's always fun. 
• painting my nails (please see exhibit A)
• hope eternal

exhibit A, in all its glory

The Bad:

• could not sleep (contractions)
• uncomfortable
• no coffee, hungry 

The Horrible:

• lots of contractions, still 3 cm
• waiting

Around 12:30, we arrive in a delivery room. It is large, spacious and fabulous. It was the only room available and I loved it! I promptly got my pitocin. The contractions got worse and really started to hurt. A few hours later, the anesthesiologist came to give me my epidural. This doctor was highly competent and extremely professional, and I have never been in so much pain.

I do not know if the spot did not accept the numbing medication or what, but Will stood in front of me and held me steady as I silently cried into him as the needle went into my back. I am so glad Will was allowed to stay in the room (definite doctor privileges - too much liability otherwise). He was my rock during that time, and helped me relax so as to finish the procedure.

Meanwhile, that epidural was total liquid gold. It was amazing once the line was in; made the rest of the evening much more bearable.

Around 5 o'clock, another resident came to check on me. Even with all the contractions, I was not moving along. They decided to break my water. After that, it was downhill skiing. Every time they checked me, I was closer and closer to 10 cm! Finally. My in-laws had checked in earlier with Grace, and all were waiting!

The last hiccup in waiting for Laura was my blood sugar. In all this time, I hadn't eaten anything since the night before. I had been given water and weak broth, and I was fading.

This is not a meal.

I felt silly, but talked to the nurse about it anyways. She checked my blood sugar and it was super low. She followed up with my attending, who ordered full-fat beef broth, jello, ginger ale and tea. I devoured it all. I watched Mulan with Will (who was studying), and texted my sister (who saved the screenshot):

Eventually, I ended up falling asleep after a boost of pain meds. My first real rest - and that felt good. Then, Will woke me up. He was positive that I was 10 cm by now and found the attending. He was right! It was time to push!

I had a full-troop in my room: my attending, a resident, a nurse and a nursing student (and Will!). The nursing student and I had bonded earlier, and now she was holding my hand and encouraging me. It was such a positive environment and I am so grateful for that. 18 minutes later, at 9:33 p.m., Laura Kathleen was born.

APGAR: 9 and 9.

8 lbs, 5 oz. and 20 inches long.

It was all very surreal. My parents were having a dinner party with their college friends, and when I texted my sister the news, everyone started celebrating and drinking to Laura. My MIL was in the waiting room, and got to meet her a few minutes later.

Will stayed for a bit, brought me flowers (tulips!!!) and then went home to sleep. Just Laura and mama time. I could tell this was the beginning of a beautiful adventure together, my Bebe Deux and me.

Grace's Birth Story

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Lady Laura: 0-5 Months

Oh, sweet lady Laura, my little love duck! There is simply not enough written about this baby.

Laura is an excellent example of an individual. When I was pregnant with Bebe Deux, people liked to give me a heads up: this baby is going to be a handful. 

So far, their prediction is completely wrong. This baby is an utter delight. Even when she is teething and crying, her sweetness is overwhelming. You just want to comfort her, and kiss her. It is so gratifying looking into the face of this little girl and having her eyes light up, and reach for her mother. I am glad we have this summer time to extra bond, and the time while Grace sleeps to have our own Laura-Mama time. 

Newborn

One Month

Two Months

Three Months

 Four Months

Five Months

This baby:

• rolls
• smiles
• grasps
• amuses 
• watches
• coos
• pivots

She is our little lady, and we all love her immensely. Grace is an especially sweet big sister - kisses and hugs her, and even called her "La-La" (once!). Laura is so strong - tummy time champ, and is trying to crawl on her belly. I suspect that is coming soon... I've also put her in the exersaucer, and she goes to town! She loves it a lot more than Grace did, and Grace is now re-newing an interest in said toy. It all rather amusing. The jealousy monster comes over for play dates!

Laura Kathleen was born during a very busy period of my life, and yes, I'll try to finish her birth story soon. If you are wondering about two under two, mamas, have no fear. Is it an adjustment? Of course. Is it hard? At times. Is it worth it? Yes.

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Laura: One Month

Lady Laura is one month (and two weeks!!) old. Unbelievable.

I decided to take a few pictures with her month sticker from Lucy Darling Shop. I did this after I put Grace to bed and before Will came home from the hospital. It had been a long day for both of us, apparently.

Laura was clearly not in the mood.

So, I nursed her. A little better on the Baldwin front.

Sort of.

At one month, Laura is:

• 11 lbs, 1 oz. 
• 22 inches
• an active observer
• seemingly serious
• socially smiles at her Dad the most
• placid with Grace's taps on the bottom, belly, and back.
• the recipient of Grace's thoughtfulness and kindness (e.g. big sister often tries to put her pinky back in her mouth)
• happiest when held, awake and sleeping
• very strong - kicked so much during her ultrasound (for a hip click) that the technician knew she was fine ((and still checked with the doctor -- Laura is perfect!))
• the most content baby

Love you, little ladybug.