Fancy-Schmancy School Projects

This is the video my little brother made as part of his project on the Vietnam War. I think it's pretty good and, compliments of my little sister's YouTube account, here it is:



song credit: "Viva La Vida" by Coldplay

Is anyone else nostalgic for the days of poster boards and crayolas?

We're going to start filming for our parents' anniversary video too, maybe I'll put some of those up as well...

"The primary end of marriage is the procreation and the education of children."

While doing research for my thesis, I have the pleasure of reading documents like papal encyclicals. Today I read Pope Pius XI's "Casti Connubii" (delivered in Rome on December 31, 1930) on Christian marriage, which followed the 1930 Lambeth Conference (Anglicans), which loosened the Protestant objections to birth control and, consequently, the binding of a true marriage. I enjoyed reading it immensely and it certainly made me think about many things, including the will of God over the will of Man. There was a passage or two which made the Libertarian in me flair up a little, but there was a comfort in it as well, knowing that one accepts things not because it's easy to understand the whats and whys, but rather because one must, and that understanding and grace to accept and be content will come, because there is God who loves us. He never promised an easy path to Heaven, but He still provided a way to get there.

I feel like life is currently a constant juxtaposition of my closely held beliefs and the actions of people I encounter in day-to-day life. Yesterday, my family attended an engagement shower where most of the couples there were cohabitating and didn't think twice about it. I talked to my parents about it in relation to my thesis (I know, it'll never leave my mind), in relation to Christianity, in relation to Catholicism and in relation to the health of society. It really ruffled me and partly because that kind of knowledge leads me to not be very excited about the wedding, which I know might seem rude, but I don't see this union as the noble institution that marriage is meant to be. One should be excited for marriages but I can't seem to give two figs about it.

Too much emphasis is put today on weddings being perfect. I don't like the term "the bride's day." Uh, I'm pretty sure there's a groom involved too, and two families coming together. With the divorce rate at about 50% too, I think weddings would be more exciting if people prepared more for the actual marriage, which isn't going to be all lovey-dovey. It's going to be Love, yes, wholly Loving the other person for exactly who they are and, from that, creating little souls to play with and educate and Love more than humanly possible, but it's going to be hard and it's going to be work and it's going to be the best part of life, if one lets it to be.

I love the way marriage is seen in the Book of Tobit. In Tobit 8:4-8, right after Tobiah and Sarah are married: "When the girl's parents left the bedroom and closed the door behind them, Tobiah arose from bed and said to his wife, "My love, get up. Let us pray and beg our Lord to have mercy on us and to grant us deliverance." She got up, and they started to pray and beg that deliverance might be theirs. He began with these words: "Blessed are you, O God of our fathers; praised be your name forever and ever. Let the heavens and all your creation praise you forever. You made Adam and you gave him his wife Eve to be his help and support; and from these two the human race descended. You said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone; let us make him a partner like himself.' Now, Lord, you know that I take this wife of mine not because of lust, but for a noble purpose. Call down your mercy on me and on her, and allow us to live together to a happy old age." They said together, "Amen, amen," and went to bed."

Instead, yesterday, the engagement shower seemed more like a thing to do, a time to get gifts, the next stage in the board game. It bothered me knowing they've already had sex, which isn't a novelty these days. I'm not completely naive, even I have been sheltered; I might prefer not to talk about things, but I know most of my friends from home have done it and I know most people I'll work with and meet after college will have already done it as well before marriage. I feel more prepared, however, then I did four years ago. I'm definitely more sure and set in my foundation, having truly grown in my faith; and tripped in my faith, and tried in my faith, and literally pushed to my knees because of my faith, which seemed so much simpler in my childhood catechism days.

I love that C.S. Lewis said “A silly idea is current that good people do not know what temptation means. This is an obvious lie. Only those who try to resist temptation know how strong it is.... A man who gives in to temptation after five minutes simply does not know what it would have been like an hour later. That is why bad people, in one sense, know very little about badness. They have lived a sheltered life by always giving in.” (Nicely said, Lewis.)

I know everyone's faced the good, the bad, and the ugly, and it is in this way that I look forward to leaving my Hillsdale bubble and being counter-cultural (like a salmon perhaps); part of being Catholic is living in the world without being of the world, and I'm almost ready to embark. I think. Almost. Okay, not yet, but I know God will provide me with the fortitude when the time comes.

Anyways, I've also been reading speeches by LBJ and company, but I don't feel like sharing his words of wisdom. They are motivated from quite a different source than where the Pope drew his inspiration. I hope you like and read more--it really is a beautiful open letter.

Casti Connubii excerpts:

"We have decided therefore to speak to you, Venerable Brethren, and through you to the whole Church of Christ and indeed to the whole human race, on the nature and dignity of Christian marriage, on the advantages and benefits which accrue from it to the family and to human society itself, on the errors contrary to this most important point of the Gospel teaching, on the vices opposed to conjugal union, and lastly on the principal remedies to be applied. ...We hereby confirm and make Our own, and while We wish to expound more fully certain points called for by the circumstances of our times, nevertheless We declare that, far from being obsolete, it retains its full force at the present day."
...

"This subjection, however, does not deny or take away the liberty which fully belongs to the woman both in view of her dignity as a human person, and in view of her most noble office as wife and mother and companion; nor does it bid her obey her husband's every request if not in harmony with right reason or with the dignity due to wife; nor, in fine, does it imply that the wife should be put on a level with those persons who in law are called minors, to whom it is not customary to allow free exercise of their rights on account of their lack of mature judgment, or of their ignorance of human affairs. But it forbids that exaggerated liberty which cares not for the good of the family; it forbids that in this body which is the family, the heart be separated from the head to the great detriment of the whole body and the proximate danger of ruin. For if the man is the head, the woman is the heart, and as he occupies the chief place in ruling, so she may and ought to claim for herself the chief place in love."

...

"These, then, are the elements which compose the blessing of conjugal faith: unity, chastity, charity, honorable noble obedience, which are at the same time an enumeration of the benefits which are bestowed on husband and wife in their married state, benefits by which the peace, the dignity and the happiness of matrimony are securely preserved and fostered. Wherefore it is not surprising that this conjugal faith has always been counted amongst the most priceless and special blessings of matrimony."

...

"All of these things, Venerable Brethren, you must consider carefully and ponder over with a lively faith if you would see in their true light the extraordinary benefits on matrimony - offspring, conjugal faith, and the sacrament. No one can fail to admire the divine Wisdom, Holiness and Goodness which, while respecting the dignity and happiness of husband and wife, has provided so bountifully for the conservation and propagation of the human race by a single chaste and sacred fellowship of nuptial union."

...

"All of which agrees with the stern words of the Bishop of Hippo in denouncing those wicked parents who seek to remain childless, and failing in this, are not ashamed to put their offspring to death: 'Sometimes this lustful cruelty or cruel lust goes so far as to seek to procure a baneful sterility, and if this fails the fetus conceived in the womb is in one way or another smothered or evacuated, in the desire to destroy the offspring before it has life, or if it already lives in the womb, to kill it before it is born. If both man and woman are party to such practices they are not spouses at all; and if from the first they have carried on thus they have come together not for honest wedlock, but for impure gratification; if both are not party to these deeds, I make bold to say that either the one makes herself a mistress of the husband, or the other simply the paramour of his wife.'"

...

"Evil is not to be done that good may come of it."

...

"Those who hold the reins of government should not forget that it is the duty of public authority by appropriate laws and sanctions to defend the lives of the innocent, and this all the more so since those whose lives are endangered and assailed cannot defend themselves. Among whom we must mention in the first place infants hidden in the mother's womb. And if the public magistrates not only do not defend them, but by their laws and ordinances betray them to death at the hands of doctors or of others, let them remember that God is the Judge and Avenger of innocent blood which cried from earth to Heaven."

...

"This, however, is not the true emancipation of woman, nor that rational and exalted liberty which belongs to the noble office of a Christian woman and wife; it is rather the debasing of the womanly character and the dignity of motherhood, and indeed of the whole family, as a result of which the husband suffers the loss of his wife, the children of their mother, and the home and the whole family of an ever watchful guardian. More than this, this false liberty and unnatural equality with the husband is to the detriment of the woman herself, for if the woman descends from her truly regal throne to which she has been raised within the walls of the home by means of the Gospel, she will soon be reduced to the old state of slavery (if not in appearance, certainly in reality) and become as amongst the pagans the mere instrument of man."

...

"To conclude with the important words of Leo XIII, since the destruction of family life 'and the loss of national wealth is brought about more by the corruption of morals than by anything else, it is easily seen that divorce, which is born of the perverted morals of a people, and leads, as experiment shows, to vicious habits in public and private life, is particularly opposed to the well-being of the family and of the State. The serious nature of these evils will be the more clearly recognized, when we remember that, once divorce has been allowed, there will be no sufficient means of keeping it in check within any definite bounds. Great is the force of example, greater still that of lust; and with such incitements it cannot but happen that divorce and its consequent setting loose of the passions should spread daily and attack the souls of many like a contagious disease or a river bursting its banks and flooding the land.'"

...

"But not only in regard to temporal goods, Venerable Brethren, is it the concern of the public authority to make proper provision for matrimony and the family, but also in other things which concern the good of souls. Just laws must be made for the protection of chastity, for reciprocal conjugal aid, and for similar purposes, and these must be faithfully enforced, because, as history testifies, the prosperity of the State and the temporal happiness of its citizens cannot remain safe and sound where the foundation on which they are established, which is the moral order, is weakened and where the very fountainhead from which the State draws its life, namely, wedlock and the family, is obstructed by the vices of its citizens."

Elusiveness in Eliot, Middlemarch Madness and Thesis Thursday

My Dad sent this to me near the end of my freshman year with a fresh box of tea to keep me going during finals. That was obviously before I started drinking coffee my sophomore/ junior year. I love post-it notes. They are so multi-purposeful! Heather and I, for example, have a quote wall where we write funny things we say or hear people say on post-it notes. People like to come in our room and read them, even when we're not there. We also prank people with them (usually the inhabitants of KKG 10), write to-do lists and leave little encouragements around the room for each other. The are like mini-epistolary communications!

Monday I had a precis due for my Southern Lit class on my research paper, Tuesday I had a paper due for my journalism class and Friday my thesis is due. It is easy to say I have been a busy and highly caffeinated little bee lately! Last night was the Trace Buncy concert, which was awesome and then Taylor, Zach and I had a thesis writing party into the wee hours of the morning (say, 5 a.m.? That made my 8 a.m. interesting, to say the least), with guest appearances by Mitch, Trevor and Henry, the Delts' mascot. I've made really good progress and am feeling good about it. I started my entire thesis over because I decided to re-organize the information. This is easily my 8th draft/ version to better follow the format of the Moynihan Report. We'll see how far I get today.

No matter what happens tonight though, I'll be home tomorrow, and that's what's pushing me through. Spring Break is coming very late this year. It normally happens around my birthday, which is nice, because then A) I'm home to celebrate my birthday with my family and B) Dad and I could have gone out to the pub for a beer on St. Pat's Day, like we did last year. That would have been really great. Oh country roads, take me home! This SB10, I'll be writing two papers, two articles and catching up on reading, etc. so it won't be a relaxing break per se, but I will be home with my family, dog and friends, and what will be wonderful. :)

Thursday poem: "Macavity: The Mystery Cat" by T.S. Eliot

Macavity's a Mystery Cat: he's called the Hidden Paw--
For he's the master criminal who can defy the Law.
He's the bafflement of Scotland Yard, the Flying Squad's despair:
For when they reach the scene of crime--Macavity's not there!

Macavity, Macavity, there's no on like Macavity,
He's broken every human law, he breaks the law of gravity.
His powers of levitation would make a fakir stare,
And when you reach the scene of crime--Macavity's not there!
You may seek him in the basement, you may look up in the air--
But I tell you once and once again, Macavity's not there!

Macavity's a ginger cat, he's very tall and thin;
You would know him if you saw him, for his eyes are sunken in.
His brow is deeply lined with thought, his head is highly doomed;
His coat is dusty from neglect, his whiskers are uncombed.
He sways his head from side to side, with movements like a snake;
And when you think he's half asleep, he's always wide awake.

Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macavity,
For he's a fiend in feline shape, a monster of depravity.
You may meet him in a by-street, you may see him in the square--
But when a crime's discovered, then Macavity's not there!

He's outwardly respectable. (They say he cheats at cards.)
And his footprints are not found in any file of Scotland Yard's.
And when the larder's looted, or the jewel-case is rifled,
Or when the milk is missing, or another Peke's been stifled,
Or the greenhouse glass is broken, and the trellis past repair--
Ay, there's the wonder of the thing! Macavity's not there!

And when the Foreign Office finds a Treaty's gone astray,
Or the Admiralty lose some plans and drawings by the way,
There may be a scap of paper in the hall or on the stair--
But it's useless of investigate--Macavity's not there!
And when the loss has been disclosed, the Secret Service say:
"It must have been Macavity!"--but he's a mile away.
You'll be sure to find him resting, or a-licking of his thumbs,
Or engaged in doing complicated long division sums.

Macavity, Macavity, there's no one like Macacity,
There never was a Cat of such deceitfulness and suavity.
He always has an alibit, or one or two to spare:
And whatever time the deed took place--MACAVITY WASN'T THERE!
And they say that all the Cats whose wicked deeds are widely known
(I might mention Mungojerrie, I might mention Griddlebone)
Are nothing more than agents for the Cat who all the time
Just controls their operations: the Napoleon of Crime!

First Things is hosting a Tournament of Novels! (Middlemarch Madness, shall we say?) Definitely vote, it's good fun. Warning: there are lots of good books, you may be forced with near moral dilemmas picking between them.

Here's some music to soothe y'all through Thursday and into Friday...

Johnny Flynn's "The Wrote and the Writ"


Regina Spektor's "Laughing With"


The Band's "The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down"


and this was good to hear since we're entering into the specialization of science epoch in History of Science and Christianity:


Happy Thursday! One week till Holy Week officially begins!

"Lent is a time when we relive the passion of Christ. Let it not be just a time when our feelings are roused, but let it be a change that comes through cooperation with God's grace in real sacrifices of self. Sacrifice, to be real, must cost; it must hurt; it must empty us of self. Let us go through the passion of Christ day by day."
--Blessed Teresa of Calcutta

post-midterm poem

"Southern Literature" by Andrew Hudgins

She hunched in the backseat and fired
one Lucky off the one before.
She talked about her good friend Bill.
No one wrote like Bill anymore.

When the silence grew uncomfortable,
she's count out my six crumpled ones
and ask, noblesse oblige, "How ah
your literary lubrications

progressing?" "Not good," I'd snarl. My poems
were going no where, like me--raw,
twenty-eight, and having, she said,
a worm's eye view of life. And awe--

I had no sense of awe. But once
I lied, "Terrific! The Atlantic
accepted five." She smiled benignly,
composed and gaily fatalistic,

as I hammered to Winn-Dixie, revving
the slant six till it bucked and sputtered.
She smoothed her blue unwrinkled dress.
"Bill won the Nobel Prize," she purred.

If I laid rubber to the interstate,
and started speeding, how long, I wondered,
how long would she scream before she prayed?
Would she sing before I murdered her?

Would we make Memphis or New Orleans?
The world is gorgeous now, and bigger.
I reached for the gun I didn't own.
I chambered awe. I pulled the trigger.

Dr. Somerville read us this poem on the first day of class and I love it. We had our midterm yesterday and it was quite difficult, but I feel decent about it. I know I switched one of the IDs (the quote's speaker was Ran MacLain, but I said it was Eugene MacLain, his twin brother-- wah-wah). I do know, through class survey, that I am the only one who got the Caroline Barr question right. Caroline Barr, since you're so curious, was William Faulkner's black mammy whom he dedicated 'Go Down, Moses' to.

I am currently in the Chemistry lounge in Strosacker with Vivian, working on the thesis. If the science people know I'm not one of them, they're not calling me out. I like it here because I can usually get away with working past 3 a.m., even though most buildings on campus close down earlier (library at 1, classroom buildings at 2) because once I'm back at Kappa, my mind starts to shut down for the night or I start talking to Heather. Pure will is going to make me stay here to push through a couple more thesis pages, because I am exhausted and it's barely 10:30 p.m. It is crunch time, though. No excuses or justifications at this point, only results.

In other news, LBJ may be my new most disliked president, but the Mumford and Sons station on Pandora is pretty great.

Happy Pi Day!

“We shall come back, no doubt, to walk down the Row and watch young people on the tennis courts by the clump of mimosas and walk down the beach by the bay, where the diving floats gently in the sun, and out to the pine grove, where the needles thick on the ground will deaden the footfall so that we shall move among the trees as soundlessly as smoke. But that will be a long time from now, and soon now we shall go out of the house and go into the convulsion of the world, and out of history into history and the awful responsibility of Time.”
--Robert Penn Warren, 'All the King's Men'

My first post as a 22 year old, so I think the quote appropriate. I've had two people tell me know how bland 22 is, and though I only into my 22nd year by 2 days, I respectfully disagree. People who say life is dull or say that they are bored are missing out. There is so much to know, so much to learn, so much to experience in this finite lifetime and 22 is exactly the kind of year that is going to prove fantastic, if not also hard and trying. Every year is a new kind of adventure: when I was 10, I entered the double-digits and my responsibilities began to double. I was the oldest of 5 kids by the time I turned 10. Over the next 8 years, I would become a second mother to my little siblings. That also didn't mean life stopped for me: it meant more people to take along for the ride.

The three little kids particularly still talk about the summer between junior and senior year, the summer of Queen and Bob Dylan sing-alongs and trips to the parks and aquarium. That was also the summer after a difficult school year. My junior year, my mother had a herniated disk and was bed-ridden, so I had to buy the groceries and pack the lunches, hold hands, give kisses, and trust that everything would be okay; it was also the year my lacrosse team won our division; the year I took AP US from Mr. Elliott (the first teacher to push me to think critically-- the reason I am an American Studies major); it was the year I began to seriously run long-distance; the year found out who my true friends in high school were. Yet that was my 17th year, the year everyone said would be boring because it was the year after I got my license but before I became legal. That certainly wasn't a boring year for me.

My sister and I were talking about that on my birthday, what it means to be old. She called me up and teased me about how that day was a special day, that March 12th; she just couldn't put her finger on why. What is old? An age or a mindset? There is, of course, the old one sees in grandparents, a growing frailty of body. Then there is the old of mind, a sage wisdom one acquires with study and experience. There is, of course, maturity and there is cultivated taste, but I think the old most people recognize is age, that tangible mark where one's years on earth are counted and celebrated. Age is a ticking of a clock (biological or otherwise), and an awful responsibility, joy and hope time brings with it. Every year older in one year closer to Christ, and one year closer to the Resurrection. It's our job now to be worthy of such an honor.

Speaking of time, back to typing furiously.